#1
Hey folks, got a new song up. It's a revision of some older material. I'm aware that the lyrics are kind of dumb, my bassist wrote em' lol. Vox by me and my bassist. I kind of suck at vox, I'm panned on the right, this is my first time so don't be too harsh. Tell me what you think and I'll crit back! Thanks.
Last edited by v2a2n2g2 at Jan 6, 2010,
#2
i like the intro with the vocals, that sounds very nice.

good riff at ~1:00

Luckily for you I cannot understand the vocals, so no comment about the lyrics

guitars sound very trebly and thin, bass sounds good and full though.

clean part ~2:05 is nice, almost sounds like an interlude in a cynic song

i like the acoustic riff at 2:36 alot, but i dont like the transition into it, it just comes out of nowhere.

really great riff at 4:05, and i love the blast beats at that section. the buildup makes me appreciate it when the blasting starts. i really enjoyed that part.

overall this is pretty well done and you definitely have some good ideas, but i feel like it lacks a certain amount of structure. it feels like a chain of ideas strung together almost randomly rather than a cohesive piece of music. this was an interesting piece though, good work

crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1255942
#3
music sounds good. its decent quality. i cant understand the singing or lyrics. and that takes allot away from the song. better to have it as an instermental if you cant understand it you know. find a singer for the band, or bring the vocals up front more. it has allot of potential. just needs to be polished. cetchy though, and kind of scary in a good way haha. great guitar playing. it seems a bit long though too. good job guys.

crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1256981
#4
It's a bit weird hearing the Children of the Grave riff (0:52) with black metal vocals. Your vocals aren't terrible, so you can mix them more in the front, I just can't understand a word you say. The riff at 2:34 is great, just think of a better way to introduce it, rather than just cutting off the riff before it. Also, I like the Opeth structure: vocals, instrumental break, vocals. Overall it's a good song, keep practicing those vocals.
#5
whatever effect you have on the vocals take it off, and raise the up a bit. So far the song is very cool. guitar tone isnt very clear, maybe a tad more mids. the first kind of acoustic interlude was very cool man. I would try clean singing at some parts, as i feel it would fit better than the growls. tremelo part at the end was pretty cool. Ending was very nice. overall pretty good job man, but if you remixed this with better quality im sure I would like it more.