Mother # 3

ten, eleven, twelve…
there, she sleeps.
her neck rests, well presented,
the best bet :
she’ll be the December tree
when the letters of September
weep green, green, green.
perfect reject
the gentle sleep
hell’s here
hell’s here.
Last edited by circular.parade at Jan 13, 2010,

A pleasure, as always, sir.

"Success is as dangerous as failure. Hope is as hollow as fear." - from Tao Te Ching

thanks guys.

Cory, I don't think I'll experiment much further with the lipograms, Christian Bök did it better than I ever could. This just kinda happened. Well not really, but you know. Maybe in a few months.

I might post the other pieces of the series but it's a little too much for me now. love to read you guys. Dylan, I'll check your album out when I'm not that lazy.
read aloud it sounds seamless
really good sonically and stylistically

the lipogram idea seems fun and is done very well, though my experience with lipograms is non-existent. I'll check out this christian bok character- the stuff on the website google gave me looks pretty interesting.
the more i think about it the more i like it and dislike it (dislike in a silly way haha) for giving me trouble (from the month part specifically) but a lot of intriguing ideas. I'm still trying to grasp it completely but I feel like I'm close and I know you dont just throw stuff out there without having a reason. I like where its coming from.

great to see you poking in.
Anatomy Anatomy
Whale Blue Review

Park that car
Drop that phone
Sleep on the floor
Dream about me
Last edited by jiminizzle at Jan 11, 2010,
dude this is great

I'm reading it and like, "ok I kinda see where he's going" and the end hits and i'm like, "wow"
"The mind is everything. What you think, you become."
Thanks a whole lot, guys. Please leave a link so I can get back to you, I'm lazy as hell.

edit : tweaked bed for neck.
Last edited by circular.parade at Jan 13, 2010,