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#1
What's the worst thing to wake up to?


I think for me it would be the Cryptkeeper fapping.
Attachments:
Crypty.jpg
Quote by slash_GNR666
You sir, are a giant c*** and you finger will forever haunt my dreams.


Quote by Kind, Non-Existant User
Coco-Loco is the finest bit of meat on the butcher block.
Last edited by coco-loco at May 18, 2010,
#2
This thread.
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I'm coming for you with a castrator!
You sick bastard.



Watch that video below

If this video reaches 1000 views before Christmas, I'll play with my titties on cam.

#3
Napalm. Sure it smells like victory, but victory burns your skin off. I think napalm sucks in the morning.
Quote by ozzyismetal
Neopowell, that's because you are a pumped-up sex offender.
Quote by Kensai
You're exactly the kind of person who'd have sex in a bar drunk
Quote by Zero-Hartman
You're a terrible, terrible man. This is a new middle for you.

I write things. You can read them.Essay on UK student riots
#4
Your mom ripping the covers off of your bed while you have a raging boner popping out of your boxers.
Check out my band Disturbed
#6
worst real experience: waking up and knowing that the girl lying next to me was no longer my girlfriend and would be leaving soon.

worst imaginary experience: this guy
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
#7
I'd say getting set on fire by your best friend. While you're asleep.

That, or waking up to a punch in the face, getting pepper sprayed, tarred and feathered, then all the people around proceed to piss on you and degrade you, THEN they set you on fire. At least you're not sleeping while you're on fire!

The first one happened to me. The second I made up.. Hopefully.


...was that a dream.. God I can't remember...
#11
Finding Dio was dead.
Warwick freak of the Bass Militia. PM Nutter_101 to join

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Damn you and Warwickyness

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gm jack knows everything
+1
#12
Quote by the bartender
worst real experience: waking up and knowing that the girl lying next to me was no longer my girlfriend and would be leaving soon.

worst imaginary experience: this guy



I was gonna say cot death

but that guy trumps cot death :\
#13
Another Davrosssss thread.
Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
#15
So far waking up to hangovers have been pretty bad.

Waking up to my mum having a go at me straight away is also quite bad, possibly worse than hangovers.

"You got home so late, you only got 5 hours sleep last night!"

"Ugh, I know..."
#17
I once woke up with a penis in my mouth. Someone broke in one night, they stole everything then decided to be a real dick, and cut off my penis, and put in my mouth. Asshole. Yes, I am a very very deep sleeper, and yes, I now have a vagina feel free to call me.
anybody wanna put anything here just let me know
#18
This is the worst thing you could wake up to, not the worst thing you have woken up to, yes? As there's obviously a massive difference.

I think I'd know shit was amiss if I woke up to see me. Not a mirror image of me, but a whole different me. It could lead to sexy shenanigans with twins and the like, but at that moment it'd freak me the fuck out.
#19
Quote by societies_worm
I once woke up with a penis in my mouth. Someone broke in one night, they stole everything then decided to be a real dick, and cut off my penis, and put in my mouth. Asshole. Yes, I am a very very deep sleeper, and yes, I now have a vagina feel free to call me.


Aren't you the guy who takes pictures of his junk?
I'd advise against having them developed, if I were you.
Quote by Zero-Hartman
Damn you, bodyheatseeker

Quote by Paramore.
bodyheatseeker, I will NEVER forgive you.

#20
Waking up to go to work.
Gear:
MXR Super Badass -->
BOSS SD WAZA -->
FENDER CD 140 SCE -->
MXR M300 REVERB -->
TC ELECTRONIC FLASHBACK
ESP EC 401 VF TSB -->
BOSS KATANA HEAD 100 WATT -->
MILF Tease
#21
Your dad throwing you to the ground saying that he heard gunshots in a nearby house is pretty bad.

Turns out it was just a flashbang from police raiding this guy's house.

Yeah we don't live there anymore
maybe if you had a
revolver
you'd
suck less

press
↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B Areceive bacon

Gamertag: Seanslaught
PSN: BeastlyBassist
Steam: Beastly396
#25
Being woke up in general just sucks so much.
Some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say there is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of God's grey Earth as that prince of foods:



the muffin!
#26
Quote by bodyheatseeker
Aren't you the guy who takes pictures of his junk?
I'd advise against having them developed, if I were you.



I use to be that guy. I haven't since the day I woke up with my own penis in my mouth. by the way, I took a picture of that.
anybody wanna put anything here just let me know
#27
A neatly coiled turd on the pillow, next to your head, when you're alone in the house.
#29
arabian goggles. /thread
2009 Gibson Explorer - 2008 Washburn Idol WI45f - 1965 MiJ Ibanez Salvador Classical
Bogner Alchemist 40w 1x12" - Marshall MG10CD
#30
waking up feeling your butt hurts and when you turn around there's some dude lying there((( and you can only hope that he was wearing a condom
#32
Quote by Grimriffer
waking up feeling your butt hurts and when you turn around there's some dude lying there((( and you can only hope that he was wearing a condom


you get used to it after a few times .
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
#33
alarm clocks, i'm telling ya they're evil...
Quote by Duff_McGee
Everyone knows that the day the Metallica ends, the world ends.
#35
Quote by davrossss
Your point?


I'm confused...

GET BACK ON TOPIC!!!


lol
Quote by slash_GNR666
You sir, are a giant c*** and you finger will forever haunt my dreams.


Quote by Kind, Non-Existant User
Coco-Loco is the finest bit of meat on the butcher block.
#36
"Come on! It's *insert time that's too late here*!" That just plain sucks. Getting woken up to be told that my grandfather had died and I was going to Florida in half an hour also sucked.

Now, I'm procrastinating about finishing a paper that's due tomorrow so I'll tell a story about the weirdest way I was woken up. Years ago, before our chimney had a screen on it to prevent occurrences like this, a flying squirrel got into my house. My dad was running after it with a hockey stick, because he thinks having a hockey stick handy at all times is always necessary, and my cat was trying to catch it. I woke up to my mom running into my room screaming bloody murder and just the general commotion of a flying squirrel chase.
#37
Quote by bloodtrocuted93

Now, I'm procrastinating about finishing a paper that's due tomorrow so I'll tell a story about the weirdest way I was woken up. Years ago, before our chimney had a screen on it to prevent occurrences like this, a flying squirrel got into my house. My dad was running after it with a hockey stick, because he thinks having a hockey stick handy at all times is always necessary, and my cat was trying to catch it. I woke up to my mom running into my room screaming bloody murder and just the general commotion of a flying squirrel chase.


That is a household I wish I lived in lol.
Quote by slash_GNR666
You sir, are a giant c*** and you finger will forever haunt my dreams.


Quote by Kind, Non-Existant User
Coco-Loco is the finest bit of meat on the butcher block.
#38
last night i had a dream my mom was licking me. i woke up to my dads friends dog licking my face.
im not sure which was worse.
#39
Quote by GoodnightHero
last night i had a dream my mom was licking me. i woke up to my dads friends dog licking my face.
im not sure which was worse.


where exactly was your mum licking you >.>?
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
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