Page 1 of 3
#1
So, like many I'm sick over the BP oil spill. And like most people ranging from geniuses who know everything and anything about engineering to idiots who think a giant bendy-straw would fix everything, I've been trying to think of a way to fix things.

So, I had an idea that actually seems not completely stupid, and I wanted some thoughts on it.

Bring an SR-71 Blackbird(For those who don't know, basically the pre-ALS Jason Becker of planes. Able to do things no other plane ever could. Still a badass 12 years after retirement and 46 years after it's first flight. World record holder despite being decades older than most modern dogfighters. Faster than most of those dogfighters too. Flies so high that for all intents and purposes it's a spacecraft. NASA's flightsuits are actually just SR-71 flightsuits adapted for the Apollo program. Rather than being able to take a hit from a missile or hide from a missile, it outruns missiles. If Chuck Norris was a plane, he'd be an SR-71) out of retirement. Task the US air force, who have a fairly good record of doing in months what private firms do in years, on engineering a plug for the hole. Equip this plug to an SR-71 and take it to maximum altitude. Then, once it's above the longitude and latitude of the pipe, have it perform the nosedive that is a common method of it's pilots to gain speed, and while it does so, launch the plug. Pull up, then let the plug, now fast enough to be unaffected by the currents and the force of the oil, fall into it's place as, well, the plug.

BP makes billions in a few months, so I guarantee they can afford to commission the plug and either rent or have a new SR-71 manufactured.

I'm sure I'm missing something huge, but I figure it's not the worst idea ever. Plus worst comes to worst, all that'll happen is a little more debris on the sea floor and maybe a few waves on the gulf coast

So, thoughts? Again, I am in no ways qualified as an engineer, so I'm sure I'm missing a few huge flaws, but I figure I'd give it a shot.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
Last edited by necrosis1193 at May 23, 2010,
#2
daytripper75

Bullieve


Quote by Amuro Jay
I'm gonna need specific instructions again on how to properly dance with my pants on my head.
Quote by lolmnt
First you put your pants on your head.
Second you dance.
Third you wipe off all the pussy.
#4
That would never work. That requires an insane amount of precision that isn't possible.

Plus it seems like you have a hard on for the SR-71 Blackbird.
^^The above is a Cryptic Metaphor^^


"To know the truth of history is to realize its ultimate myth and its inevitable ambiguity." Everything is made up and the facts don't matter.


MUSIC THEORY LINK
#5
I just got a great gif from this thread.

Edit: It is worth a try it's not like they are actually going to stop it soon. BP is basically sitting on their ass and so is the U.S. government.

Edit: "I don't belive in a lot of things, but I do believe in duct tape" Lost bitches
Last edited by Zephyr-Chills at May 24, 2010,
#6
Your kidding. Right? You want to take a plane and nosedive it into the ocean? The plane wold disintegrate upon impact with the water.

Maybe I misunderstood.

Edit:
Quote by rockingamer2
Plus it seems like you have a hard on for the SR-71 Blackbird.
Plus this. You went on way too long about the Blackbird. Kind of weird.
THE OHIO STATE BUCKEYES

Drive! Drive on down the field, men of the scarlet and gray...
I'm an
Engeneer
Enginere
Engenere
I'm good with math.

a0/2 + ∑ an cos(nπx/L) + bn sin(nπx/L)

ĤΨ(x,t) = iħ ∂Ψ(x,t)/∂t
σx σp ≥ h/2
Last edited by Got Guitar? at May 24, 2010,
#7
Quote by Dirge Humani
Sounds just as plausible as anything else that's been thought up so far.


I have a bunch of ABC gum we could use to fix it. But I think the only way to fix it is with underwater duct tape...
Random Metal-X fact:

Metal-X now sponsors: Blood Culprit!


"Ass Fuckingly Loud"

\m/^_^\m/ New Songs Up!!! \m/^_^\m/
#9
Better solution: resurrect a bunch of pterodactyls Jurassic Park-style and use them to carry a giant bucket to the oil spill, and then fill the giant bucket with the oily water. Repeat as necessary.
#10
Edit: ^Now that is an idea I can get behind.

Quote by rockingamer2
That would never work. That requires an insane amount of precision that isn't possible.


The idea BP tried failed when the dome froze. I'm not sure there are really any good ideas left.

Plus it seems like you have a hard on for the SR-71 Blackbird.


You would too if you saw one in-person.

Quote by Got Guitar?
Your kidding. Right? You want to take a plane and nosedive it into the ocean? The plane wold disintegrate upon impact with the water.

Maybe I misunderstood.


Aye, you drop the plug then pull the plane up, you don't drop the plane in.

Edit:Plus this. You went on way too long about the Blackbird. Kind of weird.


Once more, I admit to it.

Quote by ShallowEndings
Never would've thought of that.



THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 75-87
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 3-3
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 52-39
Last edited by necrosis1193 at May 24, 2010,
#11
Wouldn't have thought of it..but I could've gone without all that SR-71 felatting you did...

I say we just take buckets out there to get the water-oil mix, bring it on-shore, strain out the water, take the water back to the ocean, keep and refine the oil...

My idea= just as absurd as everything else proposed...
I'M IN THE FIGHT TO CURE CYSTIC FIBROSIS...MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!


Quote by JustRooster
I'm a straight man, but I'd put that surfcaster right in my mouth.



Quote by JD2k9
Well, life is like a penis.
Women make it hard.
Also, it's short but seems long when it gets hard.
#12
Jesus someone just wanted show off his erection for that plane. Wouldn't work because it would go ridiculously off course once it hit the water and that's even if it was directly on target which it wouldn't be.
Last edited by stephen_rettie at May 24, 2010,
#13
Mad deja vu. i just learned about the SR-71 yesterday.

Quote by necrosis1193
Rather than being able to take a hit from a missile or hide from a missile, it outruns missiles.


Also, it used to have a machine gun but it got removed because it kept flying into its own bullets.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
Your post was the only bright spot in this disgusting piece of thread.

Quote by lexanirider78
You have balls. I like balls....(awkward silence)

Quote by SeveralSpecies
I waited for the rape.

...


...but the rape never came
Last edited by ryan_nadon at May 24, 2010,
#14
Seriously? You want to nosedive a "spaceship" to launch a plug into a 21 inch hole? Not gonna happen.


My idea is to get a 21 inch or larger tube and send it down there. Now, on the end of this tube, is about 8 inches of flexible material ending at a band that is elastic in nature and has a diameter small enough to fit inside the pipe. Once placed inside the pipe, the elastic band is stretched so that it rests against the inside edge of the pipe.

The only problem is finding a way to stretch the band to full size.
Quote by MakinLattes
dwelling on past mishaps is for the weak. you must stride into the future, unabashed and prepared to fuck up yet again.
#15
Quote by Just_a_picker
Wouldn't have thought of it..but I could've gone without all that SR-71 felatting you did...

I say we just take buckets out there to get the water-oil mix, bring it on-shore, strain out the water, take the water back to the ocean, keep and refine the oil...

My idea= just as absurd as everything else proposed...

Your idea needs moar pterodactyls.
#16
Quote by rockingamer2

Plus it seems like you have a hard on for the SR-71 Blackbird.


I did a report on the plane in elementary school. It's badass.

As for the idea, LOL.


In my restless dreams...
I see that town.
Silent Hill.
You promised you'd take me there again someday.
But you never did.

Well, I'm alone there now.
In our 'special place'...
Waiting for you.

#17
With wind and ocean currents it's likely that this plug will be off target. Also a plug can only be so effective because as more oil rushes to exit, pressure builds. In the end it will explosively launch the plug outward.

Also, as the Blackbird enters its nose-dive for velocity and drops the plug, wind resistance will rapidly (and I mean hella rapidly) decrease its velocity unless it is massive enough for its inertia to carry it to the ocean floor. Getting the plug to be this massive will be difficult when the hole is so small and the plane being designed for velocity, not hauling capability.
Last edited by Seref at May 24, 2010,
#18
Quote by Holy Katana
Your idea needs moar pterodactyls.


I started typing before that post even came up, I like the idea of using pterodactyls much, much more.
I'M IN THE FIGHT TO CURE CYSTIC FIBROSIS...MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!


Quote by JustRooster
I'm a straight man, but I'd put that surfcaster right in my mouth.



Quote by JD2k9
Well, life is like a penis.
Women make it hard.
Also, it's short but seems long when it gets hard.
#19
Last I heard they were trying to jam the line to make it stop. You'd think they would put a cut off valve somewhere on it
Random Metal-X fact:

Metal-X now sponsors: Blood Culprit!


"Ass Fuckingly Loud"

\m/^_^\m/ New Songs Up!!! \m/^_^\m/
#20
The gigantic bendy straw idea was much better than this idea. At least they could cement the hole once they contain some of the flow. Launching a streamlined projectile through a huge collision and 2000 feet of ocean doesn't make sense.

EDIT: Also, the hole in the pipe is not vertical. It's parallel to the surface. Good luck dropping a plug at an angle.

And to the guy that mentioned the emergency shutoff, that was the problem with the initial explosion. The shutoff didn't work.
Warmoth Strat w/ Lace Holy Grails
'07 Roadhouse Strat
Washburn WD-21 all Koa Acoustic
Marshall JCM-2000 TSL-122
Bugera V-5
Last edited by Rogue Hermit at May 24, 2010,
#21
Too much aim involved lol
R.I.P. Ronnie James Dio. Supplied amazing music to both me and my mother.

He will be missed.
#22
We could take a page out of Armageddon and send a nuke in to the hole. If it goes down exactly like Armageddon, the biggest casualty will be France, so it's win/win.
#23
better yet... send an x wing down their and use the force to shoot a proton torpedo into the leaking whole. That should fix the problem
#24
Quote by necrosis1193
Aye, you drop the plug then pull the plane up, you don't drop the plane in.
Ah, alright. Yeah, that's about a good idea as any right now.

Definitely still won't work though.

THE OHIO STATE BUCKEYES

Drive! Drive on down the field, men of the scarlet and gray...
I'm an
Engeneer
Enginere
Engenere
I'm good with math.

a0/2 + ∑ an cos(nπx/L) + bn sin(nπx/L)

ĤΨ(x,t) = iħ ∂Ψ(x,t)/∂t
σx σp ≥ h/2
#25
Quote by necrosis1193
BRather than being able to take a hit from a missile or hide from a missile, it outruns missiles.


Quote by ryan_nadon
Also, it used to have a machine gun but it got removed because it kept flying into its own bullets.


The SR-71 is... the most interesting plane in the world.
#26
You don't realize that something hitting the water at 3000 miles an hour could cause a massive title wave
Last edited by Minion2580 at May 24, 2010,
#27
Quote by Minion2580
So you think someone should fly an SR-71 into the water at mach 3? Thats retarded
No. He cleared that issue up a few post up. However, yes, the whole idea is still, indeed, retarded. I'll give you that.
THE OHIO STATE BUCKEYES

Drive! Drive on down the field, men of the scarlet and gray...
I'm an
Engeneer
Enginere
Engenere
I'm good with math.

a0/2 + ∑ an cos(nπx/L) + bn sin(nπx/L)

ĤΨ(x,t) = iħ ∂Ψ(x,t)/∂t
σx σp ≥ h/2
#28
Quote by firebird103
better yet... send an x wing down their and use the force to shoot a proton torpedo into the leaking whole. That should fix the problem

Someone get this guy a medal!
#29
Quote by Minion2580
You don't realize that something hitting the water at 3000 miles an hour could cause a massive title wave


Not to mention that whatever is hitting the water at Mach 3 will have to be built out of Unobtanium or some shit to not disintegrate on impact with the water's surface.
#33
Quote by firebird103
better yet... send an x wing down their and use the force to shoot a proton torpedo into the leaking whole. That should fix the problem

Use your harpoons and tow cables to plug the hole.
Quote by Yakult
If I get a boner I generally pass out due to the massive amount of blood having to be redirected from my brain


Quote by DubStar92
I like to video record myself when I'm drunk. It's like a mini-movie. I love fapping to the sex scene.
#34
Quote by larrytheguitar
Too much aim involved lol


I just read your sig. Epic! You just summed up that whole episode with plenty of Lulz.
Warmoth Strat w/ Lace Holy Grails
'07 Roadhouse Strat
Washburn WD-21 all Koa Acoustic
Marshall JCM-2000 TSL-122
Bugera V-5
#35
Quote by Minion2580
You don't realize that something hitting the water at 3000 miles an hour could cause a massive title wave


Depends how big it is (not defending this bat-shit crazy idea I assure you)

Also you know it's tidal right?
#37
Quote by Holy Katana
Better solution: resurrect a bunch of pterodactyls Jurassic Park-style and use them to carry a giant bucket to the oil spill, and then fill the giant bucket with the oily water. Repeat as necessary.

F****** GENIUS
#38
Just as a note bout the Blackbird:
It leaks fuel at low altitudes. They would take off with only about 1/2 to 3/4 of fuel and then be refueled by a tanker mid-air.
So you'd also be putting jet fuel in the water as well?

Blackbirds are Badass though.....
28
"Here we are, Juggernaut."

/C/R/A/C/K/ my anti-dru...
#39
Quote by rockingamer2
That would never work. That requires an insane amount of precision that isn't possible.

Plus it seems like you have a hard on for the SR-71 Blackbird.


It's not impossible. I used to bullseye womp rats in my SR-71 back home, they're not much bigger than two meters.
sɹǝʇndɯoɔ ɥʇıʍ poob ʇou ɯı uʍop ǝpısdn sıɥʇ sı ʎɥʍ pob ɥo
Last edited by Outerspacegrass at May 24, 2010,
#40
That might have been the most retarded idea I've ever heard. Blackbirds weren't armed, and they don't have anything that can carry armaments let alone a giant "plug".
Also, hitting the water at high speed is the same as hitting solid ground.

Quote by ryan_nadon
Also, it used to have a machine gun but it got removed because it kept flying into its own bullets.

Wut. Where did you hear that?

Why would a reconnaissance plane that was designed to avoid combat have a gun?
maybe if you had a
revolver
you'd
suck less

press
↑ ↑ ↓ ↓ ← → ← → B Areceive bacon

Gamertag: Seanslaught
PSN: BeastlyBassist
Steam: Beastly396
Page 1 of 3