#1
Sup Pit. You all fap (or schlick, as it may be to the .01% of the female population here). This thread is for all your techniques!


I just tried this the other day and it was AMAZING.




Reveal the ways of the fap.
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#2
Not sure if serious. You've actually done that?
daytripper75

Bullieve


Quote by Amuro Jay
I'm gonna need specific instructions again on how to properly dance with my pants on my head.
Quote by lolmnt
First you put your pants on your head.
Second you dance.
Third you wipe off all the pussy.
#3
With my hands.

EDIT: That seems like a waste of perfectly good ramen.
Last edited by crazy8rgood at Jun 7, 2010,
#5
Quote by JayT44
Not sure if serious. You've actually done that?




just the once.
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#6
Quote by fearofthemark


just the once.

I will try this. And think about you.

EDIT: v
daytripper75

Bullieve


Quote by Amuro Jay
I'm gonna need specific instructions again on how to properly dance with my pants on my head.
Quote by lolmnt
First you put your pants on your head.
Second you dance.
Third you wipe off all the pussy.
Last edited by JayT44 at Jun 7, 2010,
#7
Quote by crazy8rgood
With my hands.

EDIT: That seems like a waste of perfectly good ramen.


You can always eat it afterwards
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#8
Quote by fearofthemark
Sup Pit. You all fap (or schlick, as it may be to the .01% of the female population here). This thread is for all your techniques!


I just tried this the other day and it was AMAZING.

*brilliant idea.img*


Reveal the ways of the fap.
Took me a minuet to figure out if goes from right to left.

But i'v heard all kinds of stuff, (and tried a lot of it) but none have worked better then a clenched fist. However, i want to try cutting a hole in an eggplant and going to town on that. I hear it's wonderful.
Quote by MakinLattes
I'd kill you and wear your skin.
Quote by Siv During Livh
To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet's nest is a very bad idea,

Voted UG's worst cross dresser.
Also voted #95 on UG's Top 100 2013. Like it means anything....
#10
Quote by muffinduck01
Took me a minuet to figure out if goes from right to left.

But i'v heard all kinds of stuff, (and tried a lot of it) but none have worked better then a clenched fist. However, i want to try cutting a hole in an eggplant and going to town on that. I hear it's wonderful.


Daytripper75 laughed at me for mentioning that in another thread
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#11
in your closet, and under your bed occasionaly
Quote by Teh Traineez0rz
if the rest of us wanted rhino porn we would've looked for it ourselves.


Quote by BlacksailsTippa
That's one large penis I'm frightened


Quote by Dwight.Schrute
I had sex with my dad.
#13
You know, that is an interesting way to make a male sex toy. But the Japanese would definitely be the ones to think of that. They actually have "masturbation cups" for sale. Like the Tenga series, made by the same folks who make those masturbation eggs someone posted here a few months ago:



I just fap with my hand reversed. It feels better to me. Sometimes I do the "rosy palm," which is when you rub the glans around in your palm, which feels AWESOME. It's pretty intense.
Last edited by Holy Katana at Jun 7, 2010,
#15
Quote by darkcheef
No thanks, I'm not letting spicy sauce go into my dickhole and burn.


you obviously wouldn't get the cajun chicken flavor

Quote by Holy Katana
You know, that is an interesting way to make a male sex toy.

I just fap with my hand reversed. It feels better to me. Sometimes I do the "rosy palm," which is when you rub the glans around in your palm, which feels AWESOME. It's pretty intense.


I can never get to completion with the rosy palm. It's crazy intense, but I can't do it for more than like 10 seconds.
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#16
Idea just popped into my head:
Hollow out a vibrator, and wear it.........in public.
Quote by sadSTATUE
Uhmmm... Well, apparently I was mentioned in a thread called "Japan and Lesbians."

Quote by Unknown_Biskit
Try typing "potatoes" with your dick then submit it.



My cover of Manchester Orchestra's "I Can Feel Your Pain"
http://www.mediafire.com/?jfvt54j4mkiiq99
#17


man o man
Sell and Promote your music TuneHub!



wy is yer mad at muy gramhar fer?


Quote by jimmyled
jimmybanks youre a genius.


aparently i ar smrt?
Quote by dyingLeper
jimmybanks youre a genius


GO SENS GO
#18
Quote by Holy Katana
You know, that is an interesting way to make a male sex toy. But the Japanese would definitely be the ones to think of that. They actually have "masturbation cups" for sale. Like the Tenga series, made by the same folks who make those masturbation eggs someone posted here a few months ago:



I just fap with my hand reversed. It feels better to me. Sometimes I do the "rosy palm," which is when you rub the glans around in your palm, which feels AWESOME. It's pretty intense.



Urban Dictionary: "Feels enormously great if you can reach orgasm..."

...I will try this.
#19
Lonely?
No Girlfriend?

NO PROBLEM
<FLESHLIGHT PICTURE REMOVED>
On playing the Paul Gilbert signature at the guitar store extensively, my missus sighed:
"Put it down now, It's like you love that guitar more than me!"
In Which I replied.
"Well it has got two F-Holes!"
Last edited by Nameless742 at Jun 7, 2010,
#20
FFUUU - to the man who already posted the "I love noodles"

and generally, just hand, basic "Jerkin It" motion.

I've heard something about a vaccum cleaner, but I'm not going to risk it...


████████████
████████████








RBY CYOA
#21
Quote by fearofthemark
you obviously wouldn't get the cajun chicken flavor


I can never get to completion with the rosy palm. It's crazy intense, but I can't do it for more than like 10 seconds.

At first I couldn't, but eventually I got more used to that amount of stimulation. I don't ever use the rosy palm by itself unless I have the house to myself, though, because it makes me moan, and I'd rather not embarrass myself like that.
#22
^ that will probably get you banned

edit/ up a few
Sell and Promote your music TuneHub!



wy is yer mad at muy gramhar fer?


Quote by jimmyled
jimmybanks youre a genius.


aparently i ar smrt?
Quote by dyingLeper
jimmybanks youre a genius


GO SENS GO
#23
Quote by Thrill-house
My gf does it for me.



+1
Gamertag: ThruEyesOfDeath
Games: CoD4, GoW2, RB2, MW2
#24
Quote by MonkeyLink07
FFUUU - to the man who already posted the "I love noodles"

and generally, just hand, basic "Jerkin It" motion.

I've heard something about a vaccum cleaner, but I'm not going to risk it...


haha

And I.....eeeI.... will always love...
NoooooOoooodles!
On playing the Paul Gilbert signature at the guitar store extensively, my missus sighed:
"Put it down now, It's like you love that guitar more than me!"
In Which I replied.
"Well it has got two F-Holes!"
#25
Quote by Nameless742
Lonely?
No Girlfriend?

NO PROBLEM
*flesh light*

Wait, they ship with a stop watch???
Quote by MakinLattes
I'd kill you and wear your skin.
Quote by Siv During Livh
To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet's nest is a very bad idea,

Voted UG's worst cross dresser.
Also voted #95 on UG's Top 100 2013. Like it means anything....
#26
i never thought of using noodles that way

TS, you deserve a lol stack for this one



Quote by metaldud536
...I mean if indians stood naked in front of me, i couldn't tell if they're hispanic or native american. unless they put on clothes

At first he was like...
Quote by Twistedrock
I love you, man. No homo

But then, he was like...
Quote by Twistedrock
I love you even more now. Slightly homo
#27
Quote by Nameless742
Lonely?
No Girlfriend?

NO PROBLEM
<FLESHLIGHT PICTURE REMOVED>

The Fleshlight?

Nah, man, you want a Meiki. They've even got one modeled after Maria Ozawa's pussy. Like, not just the outside, but the inside, too.
#28
vacuum cleaner?

>.>

<.<

no clean up necessary....

first hand experience...
Quote by jimmyled
You have a Badger Song avatar!!!!!

Quote by Oprah
VAJAYJAY


Monkey Ball Sack

#29
Quote by Holy Katana
The Fleshlight?

Nah, man, you want a Meiki. They've even got one modeled after Maria Ozawa's pussy. Like, not just the outside, but the inside, too.


*googles*
...
...

Whoa
On playing the Paul Gilbert signature at the guitar store extensively, my missus sighed:
"Put it down now, It's like you love that guitar more than me!"
In Which I replied.
"Well it has got two F-Holes!"
#30
Quote by Nameless742
*googles*
...
...

Whoa

It also comes with a little bottle of lube that's chemically identical to Maria's pussy juice. I swear I'm not making this up. Apparently they had her advising them to make sure it was accurate.
#32
Try this next Mark.
Quote by SomeoneYouKnew
You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

Quote by Axelfox
Yup, a girl went up to me in my fursuit one time.

Quote by Xiaoxi
I can fap to this. Keep going.
#33
Quote by Holy Katana
The Fleshlight?

Nah, man, you want a Meiki. They've even got one modeled after Maria Ozawa's pussy. Like, not just the outside, but the inside, too.

Just did a Google search of her.....

DAMN!!!

I cant imagine that toy being too good though if she's a porn star....but if your a fan of hers, who knows. Maybe if the made a model of her to go around the fake vag....

Quote by Metallizach
vacuum cleaner?

>.>

<.<

no clean up necessary....

first hand experience...

Thats one of the few things i refuse to try. I have heard some horror stories....
Quote by MakinLattes
I'd kill you and wear your skin.
Quote by Siv During Livh
To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet's nest is a very bad idea,

Voted UG's worst cross dresser.
Also voted #95 on UG's Top 100 2013. Like it means anything....
#34
Quote by Jackal58
Try this next Mark.


The dirt would irritate

and the aluminum would cut me


WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME
Quote by guitarxo
I had a dream about your avatar once, so yes of course.

Quote by Bladez22


every time i see that twirling electrode avatar of yours I know that the post is worth reading or the link is worth clicking


#35
I don't know... Some of these are a little wierd. I'm sure most of you have already read this.

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Guts

Don't say you weren't warned.


████████████
████████████








RBY CYOA
#36
Quote by MonkeyLink07
I don't know... Some of these are a little wierd. I'm sure most of you have already read this.

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!

Guts

Don't say you weren't warned.

Even if you do read it, dont be stupid like me and try stuff that was featured in there. Not pleasant at ALL.
Quote by MakinLattes
I'd kill you and wear your skin.
Quote by Siv During Livh
To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet's nest is a very bad idea,

Voted UG's worst cross dresser.
Also voted #95 on UG's Top 100 2013. Like it means anything....
#37
Quote by muffinduck01
Just did a Google search of her.....

DAMN!!!

I cant imagine that toy being too good though if she's a porn star....but if your a fan of hers, who knows. Maybe if the made a model of her to go around the fake vag....


Thats one of the few things i refuse to try. I have heard some horror stories....

http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/a_few_choice_words_about_tightness

And yes, every time I see a pic of Maria, it reminds me of this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erDwXMBYcjA