Poll: Has he done anything immoral?
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View poll results: Has he done anything immoral?
Yes
112 30%
No
219 58%
Unsure
45 12%
Voters: 376.
Page 1 of 9
#1
So, there's been threads that question whether or not it is okay to have sex with a woman if she's drunk and shit. But I wanted to change the scenario a bit.

So I was wondering this scenario today:

Consent certainly is a very important factor when question whether or not sex under certain context is okay or not. So lets say a guy goes out with this girl that he's just friends with, and they're going to a party or a wedding or some shit.

This guy says a little before they get to the party to his friend "Hey, I'm just gonna warn you; Don't drink too much...Because there's a good chance I might take advantage of the opportunity, if you know what I mean". And the girl's like "Yeah, whatever."

So after she has one drink, the guy is like "Hey, don't forget what I told you". And she just says "Yeah, I know, I know..."

So she gets drunk, the guy uses his charm, and they fuck like rabbits.

So do you think the guy has done anything immoral? Since he did warn her of the consequences of her getting drunk? And assume the girl wouldn't want to have sex with this guy if she was sober.

And for the record, no, I didn't do this to a girl.
Last edited by The Madcap at Jun 9, 2010,
#2
As far as I see it, if both parties are inebriated, anything goes. But in this specific case, no I don't see anything immoral about it.
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#8
If both parties are drunk anything goes, your under the influence you dont think with a straight mind. But if one person isnt, it is extremely wrong if the person that isnt drunk goes in for the kill, doesnt matter if they say that shit beforehand (which no normal person would say "hey if you get drunk i might take advantage of you"), if the drunk person starts it, i say go for it, you can just say they were pressuring you.
#9
in this specific case yes he has because he clearly uses the words take advantage of. essentially he lets his intentions known. On the other hand if two people get drink and it just happens then its not really immoral in my opinion.

If he was really worried about having sex with her then he would either let her go home with one of her girls or he would actually put forth some effort to keep her from getting to that point. but its pretty clear from the description that he let her get drunk to make it easier to bed her down.

as for consequences he should probably might expect her to feel like you took advantage of her (especially if she makes it perfectly clear that you are "just friends" aka in the friend zone which also means no sex under normal circumstances).
Last edited by Zayrank at Jun 9, 2010,
#10
Well, legally he still raped her. Morally though? I don't feel like giving warnings to a bad behavior is any excuse for that behavior. I could see an argument for consent, but if that were to happen in a real life scenario, I imagine the girl would assume that he's joking.
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#11
Nothing wrong with it. All women are *****s anyways, they love being taken advantage of.

Fun fact: all women have rape fantasies.
#12
Quote by Våd Hamster
Consent under influence is still consent.


Not under the law of the United States, and I'd assume there are date rape laws in most Western countries, if not most countries.
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#13
She was drunk... He was not. He even told her he was going to take advantage of her, and by using those words it sounds like he knew he was doing something wrong. So yeah, it's immoral IMO
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#14
Quote by AzureNight
Nothing wrong with it. All women are *****s anyways, they love being taken advantage of.

Fun fact: all women have rape fantasies.



Quote by tayroar
Not under the law of the United States, and I'd assume there are date rape laws in most Western countries, if not most countries.


I must admit I haven't really looked into the legal aspect of it. Are saying that if you are under the influence of alcohol, you cannot consent to sex?
Last edited by Våd Hamster at Jun 9, 2010,
#15
I would just think it's ****ing creepy if a guy tells me he'll 'take advantage of me' if I get drunk.
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#16
the guy seems like kind of a slime ball because it seems that he sees nothing wrong with taking advantage of drunk chicks as long as he tells them he'll take advantage of them first, assuming he's sober it is immoral in my opinion
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#17
its probably considered rape but if the girl had any sense, she should have booked the second 'taking advantage of you' was thrown into the equation.
#18
I get myself drunk too, so that way I don't feel as guily
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#19
Let's look at this closely. Also I'm gonna edit this to suit my fancy, because I don't care what you say, this is a Someone Who Isn't Me story.
Quote by The Madcap

SWIM says a little before they get to the party to his friend "Hey, I'm just gonna warn you; Don't drink too much...Because there's a good chance I might take advantage of the opportunity, if you know what I mean". And the girl's like "Yeah, whatever."

Why would he say this? Plausible deniability. He's basically yelling surprise. You could use this as evidence that he planned to get her drunk and take advantage, which is date rape. Of course, she isn't taking him seriously, but the ONLY reason to do this, is to stave off a rape accusation. Red flag.

So after she has one drink, SWIM is like "Hey, don't forget what I told you". And she just says "Yeah, I know, I know..."

Same.

So she gets drunk, SWIM uses his charm, and they fuck like rabbits.

So do you think SWIM has done anything immoral? Since he did warn her of the consequences of her getting drunk? And assume the girl wouldn't want to have sex with SWIM if she was sober.

1. SWIY basically says, "if you get drunk, I'm secksing you up."
2. Woman blows it off as a joke, gets drunk.
3. SWIY seckses Woman up.
4. Woman would not have consented, was she sober.

It's a fucking dick move. Is it legally rapey, probably not, maybe if he was sober... but I have to tell you, I've got a burning hatred for guys like SWIY.

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#20
Drunk women aren't in full possession of their senses, so if they say no it doesn't count.
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#21
Quote by SteveHouse
It's a fucking dick move. Is it legally rapey, probably not, maybe if he was sober... but I have to tell you, I've got a burning hatred for guys like SWIY.
Took the words right out of my mouth.
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#22
Legally: rape. They constantly drill into our heads at my school that a sober yes is the only type of consent. (My school is 60-40 girls to guys and there have been issues of sexual assault and stuff)

Did he do something wrong? Yeah, I think it's pretty weird/creepy/wrong to say "if you get drunk I'm going to take advantage of you[\i]". Should he be punished? If he was pushing her to drink- yes, if she was getting hammered on her own accord, no.
#24
To Freshoutta:

In my experiences though the girls had stated previously that they wouldn't mind being with me. One I was kinda into and the other was into me. So there was advanced consent before inebriation came forth. In my context; there was an agreement before, hence, the offer still stands.

I'm not speaking for the general public though.
#25
Quote by Våd Hamster
I must admit I haven't really looked into the legal aspect of it. Are saying that if you are under the influence of alcohol, you cannot consent to sex?


Yes and no, it really depends on how you feel about the sex the next morning. Taking a girl to the bar, and getting her drunk, and having sex with her can easily be considered rape, and if she were to press charges, you would be prosecuted under charges of rape. This even goes if both parties were drunk.
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#26
Holy shit 2002

This thread is now about cyco_bob.

[IN PHIL WE TRUST]


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#27
Quote by bellamy_morello
the guy seems like kind of a slime ball because it seems that he sees nothing wrong with taking advantage of drunk chicks as long as he tells them he'll take advantage of them first, assuming he's sober it is immoral in my opinion


Well then apparently she thinks there is nothing wrong with getting drunk knowing she might consent.

IMO if you get drunk then consent/make a mistake you have to accept the consequences. You know what you are getting into when you begin to drink.
#28
Quote by tayroar
Yes and no, it really depends on how you feel about the sex the next morning. Taking a girl to the bar, and getting her drunk, and having sex with her can easily be considered rape, and if she were to press charges, you would be prosecuted under charges of rape. This even goes if both parties were drunk.


Shrödinger's rape.
#29
Quote by KingJustinian25
Well then apparently she thinks there is nothing wrong with getting drunk knowing she might consent.

IMO if you get drunk then consent/make a mistake you have to accept the consequences. You know what you are getting into when you begin to drink.


i just think the guy should have tried to control himself if he knew he would try to take advantage of his friend
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#30
TBH i think that's kind of a risk you take when you get drunk. I'll probably get shit for saying that, but it's the way I feel.
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#31
Let's change the question a little to put the morality to the test, then see how you feel.

Your buddy comes up to you before a wicked party and says "Dude, I hope you know I'm getting totally plastered, and I hope you don't, cause if you get drunk, I might 'steal your car and rob your house,' if you know what I mean."

That's cool?

Being drunk is not a 'get out of jail free' card, nor is it an excuse to act stupid. Your behavior is still your behavior. Saying "Oh, well I was drunk" doesn't make you less guilty, it just makes you less decent a person.

And before you flood with "Straight edge opinion forcing Bible beater" or some crap like that, I've done my share of partying. I've just never been such a tool that I'd blame my actions on it.
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#32
Quote by SteveHouse
Let's look at this closely. Also I'm gonna edit this to suit my fancy, because I don't care what you say, this is a Someone Who Isn't Me story.

Why would he say this? Plausible deniability. He's basically yelling surprise. You could use this as evidence that he planned to get her drunk and take advantage, which is date rape. Of course, she isn't taking him seriously, but the ONLY reason to do this, is to stave off a rape accusation. Red flag.


Same.


1. SWIY basically says, "if you get drunk, I'm secksing you up."
2. Woman blows it off as a joke, gets drunk.
3. SWIY seckses Woman up.
4. Woman would not have consented, was she sober.

It's a fucking dick move. Is it legally rapey, probably not, maybe if he was sober... but I have to tell you, I've got a burning hatred for guys like SWIY.



this. my first thought when reading the OP was 'why would you even say that?' and then steve took care of all the stuff im not articulate enough to say myself
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#34
Quote by strat0blaster
Let's change the question a little to put the morality to the test, then see how you feel.

Your buddy comes up to you before a wicked party and says "Dude, I hope you know I'm getting totally plastered, and I hope you don't, cause if you get drunk, I might 'steal your car and rob your house,' if you know what I mean."

That's cool?

Being drunk is not a 'get out of jail free' card, nor is it an excuse to act stupid. Your behavior is still your behavior. Saying "Oh, well I was drunk" doesn't make you less guilty, it just makes you less decent a person.

And before you flood with "Straight edge opinion forcing Bible beater" or some crap like that, I've done my share of partying. I've just never been such a tool that I'd blame my actions on it.



And that doesn't apply to the girl because...?
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#35
Quote by Våd Hamster
Consent under influence is still consent.


If you analyze the entire scenario, it appears that she gave him consent before she was drunk to have sex with her when she was drunk
#36
i'm starting to think that this is more of a question of the guy's character, he does something he knows is wrong but he thinks its fine because he gave warning
It's always the last day of summer and I've been left out in the cold with no door to get back in
#37
To the guys saying "that's the risk you take when getting drunk" are you serious? Does their bad decision really excuse your inappropriate behavior? I mean that's really no different than raping a woman, and saying "she deserved it for wearing that short skirt." It's an immoral action.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#38
Just so you guys know, I got the idea for this thread from watching That '70s Show this morning, and Fez and Jackie were going to a wedding, and Fez just goes "Jackie, I'm just warning you not to drink too much...........because I will take advantage."
#39
Quote by DeadlyIllness
If you analyze the entire scenario, it appears that she gave him consent before she was drunk to have sex with her when she was drunk


Well she did blow it off as nothing instead of slapping him in the face, you could argue that's consent.

But

So she gets drunk, the guy uses his charm, and they **** like rabbits.

sounds like consent to me.

Quote by tayroar
To the guys saying "that's the risk you take when getting drunk" are you serious? Does their bad decision really excuse your inappropriate behavior? I mean that's really no different than raping a woman, and saying "she deserved it for wearing that short skirt." It's an immoral action.


It's a very grey area is what it is. Say she's totally fine with it while she's drunk, but changes mind during the next morning. What then? is it rape?
Last edited by Våd Hamster at Jun 9, 2010,
#40
Quote by tayroar
To the guys saying "that's the risk you take when getting drunk" are you serious? Does their bad decision really excuse your inappropriate behavior? I mean that's really no different than raping a woman, and saying "she deserved it for wearing that short skirt." It's an immoral action.



I didn't say he wasn't at all at fault. I just have a hard time having sympathy for people who get so trashed they can't tell up from down, and then they proceed to ruin some guy's life because they consented to sex UTI. And considering how damaging it is to a guy to even be accused of rape, I stand by what I said.
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