#1
So a new piece. I haven't posted anything in a while, and I really like this piece. I'd love some constructive criticism here. So shred away folks.

Your in transit, i'm in free fall
Delusions of grandeur, in the middle of that hall
A misjudge of confidence, or a lapse in time
I can only wonder what could have been mine.
Step out into the lights outside
And close my eyes and swallow my pride

A way to guide me and a piece of mind
Walking around for a face to find
Names are nothing, or worse, a lie
My chance is blown as you say goodbye

Your all I see, nowhere to be found
I make a start, as I ask around
Person to person, a hint of denial
With only your existence questioned on trail

Walking amongst me, for a brief period of time
Stealing my attention, was never a crime
A nervous glance, and a flirty wink
My heart and head are out of sync

A way to guide me and a piece of mind
Walking around for a face to find
Names are nothing, or worse, a lie
My chance is blown as you say goodbye

I make my descent from the clouds
Back home as the darkness surrounds
It's the unknown that hurts the most
Not knowing when we'll be close
World's apart, or just cross town
I surrender as you hold me down
#2
Not bad, but it strikes me as your typical prog metal lyrics. Keep it up, man.
Epi Les Paul
#3
I think it's a little to vague... I have that problem to though, it's like you don't really have a message (at least that I can find). But it's written well, I'll give you that!
Quote by leg end

"Roses are red,
Violets are bitchin'
Goddammit woman,
get back in the kitchen"