#1
so i wrote this song today..
i think its a great song, but since im the author , then why shouldnt i think that?
so i wondered if you guys could look at it and tell me your opinion, any critics is welcome, just keep it serious

Thanks!

From the sea they rose
To serve the gods of ancient times
Delievering the message of your impending doom
Children of man, your time has come
Now is the time to make a stand

The withered corpses of something that was
Buried within the legends of ancient heroes
Arise from the earth, once again to slay
The non-believer and his kin
The servants of god, your doom is at hand

The army of evil arise
Their eyes burning bright with hate
Swords and armor, painted with blood
Burning your villages to the ground
Punishing you , for your belief in the false god

Nostrum Causa Est Justus
Nostrum Causa Est Justus
Nostrum Causa Est Justus
#2
good old pagan fury is always great. the only line i have a problem with is "now is the time to make a stand," which is too plain and common.
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

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#3
Quote by dopelope
lol, very emo, god wont hurt you. not bad tho


I strongly disagree, I don't think it is anywhere even close to emo. I think it's a solid song, I'm curious to hear how it would be sung though.
#4
Quote by dopelope
lol, very emo, god wont hurt you. not bad tho


but Thor will hurt you for believing in God. and for incorrectly labeling this emo.
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

Like melodic, black, death, symphonic, and/or avant-garde metal? Want to collaborate? Message me!
#5
Quote by vIsIbleNoIsE
good old pagan fury is always great. the only line i have a problem with is "now is the time to make a stand," which is too plain and common.


What about "Your death is at hand"?

btw, thanks for the feedback guys, nice to hear other opinions (:
#6
Quote by andersen92
What about "Your death is at hand"?

btw, thanks for the feedback guys, nice to hear other opinions (:


i would have preferred this, but you use "your doom is at hand" later on.

anything else is probably better than "make a stand." it has a really adolescent feel which brings the viking-esque glory of the rest of the thing down.
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

Like melodic, black, death, symphonic, and/or avant-garde metal? Want to collaborate? Message me!