I'm currently learning Marquee Moon by Television (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jlbunmCbTBA )

And a basic part is played like this:

E ---7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7-------|
B ---7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7-------|

B ---7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7-------|
G ---7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7 p 5 h 7-------|

I just can't seem to do it and get it to sound good/clean. I'm doing the h-on/p-off with only my third finger, is this the way I should be attempting it?

Any tips on correct technique?

Originally posted by Lorddrg7
If crap came in a package, it would probably be wrapped in this
I know what you mean. The E&B notes are easier. If you've been trying for a while, and have experimented with a few different fingerings, there's not really much more you can do, unless you feel like playing:
Which is a bit harder but you won't have to worry about accidentally hammering the E string when you're doing the GB strings, as that's what I'd do as I barre the hammers with my 3rd finger, 1st finger barring the two 5's. The only other way I'd do it is use my second finger to hammer as well as my 3rd and press them against each other, so that the 3rd finger, which like you is my stronger hammering finger, controls the movement of the 2nd.
What I would do is keep your first finger barring the 5th fret the entire time, then use whatever finger is most comfortable to hammer and pull off the 7th.

A lot of times, if I can't get a great sound with just the hammer ons and pull ofs, I might strum the fret I'm pulling off to make sure I get the stronger sound I'm looking for. (some call it cheating, but whatever works...)

That's just what I do, you could try that and it may not work for you, what you're probably going to have to do is just experiment with different ways of doing it until you find the way that works best for you.
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