#1
thanks, ill need it. i miss ya! im so tired when im posting this, but I can’t sleep. ive had a lot of trouble with that lately. and for some reason, you keep coming to mind. this sucks. id be creeped the hell out if it was vice versa with someone that I disliked as much as I think you dislike me. it all feels like a ruse. a very complicated, very elaborate ruse. and its all been done SO many times before. you have no idea. I can’t think of the right words to come to my head so that I can make this seem realistic and genuine. I can’t just spout them out, because it might sound wrong. its like I look at your friends and I look at my friends and I feel like mine are always there, and yours always hurt you. but yours are prettier. and you have more of them. even though mine seem to care more, you have the sociologically defined ‘better’ friends. and im inferior in every way. you’ve changed so much since I last saw you in England, face to face, and I feel like im the same exact person. you listened to august burns red and my chemical romance and I don’t even remember what crap I listened to, except that its crap. and I cant even bring myself to say that yours was crap too, even though it was. and im tired. and its because ive been wearing girls like clothes. I always told myself that I should be able to do better than you. I felt like I never did anything when I was with you, and that was why you never liked me much at all. so I went out and did something with someone else who I didn’t even really care about, and I told you. and then a while later, the day obama was elected president, you tell me you ****ed some kid rj and that it hurt since it was your first time. I make some comment about how you would be a sexy nun. its funny how things like that stick in my mind, but I cant even remember kissing you. I remember the way you would sound purposefully exasperated and the quirks and how your best friend was Melanie, still is, and you would say that a lot, and how your sister said I was hot when we got out of the movie theater after seeing that godawful movie meet the Spartans. I remember hearing you and amy in the theater talking about how you should just KISS me and the tension, and the way I would bs later about how I didn’t realize it and how I would be better, that I would make myself better. I remember loathing it when jake called you a ***** in seminar but him not caring. he’s bitter and jealous and he likes you a lot. im immature and sad and I never mean anything that I say, and I like to pretend that im sophisticated by listening to obscure music. but I like it so much that it doesn’t even really matter to me anymore. all the songs I listen to remind me of you. it doesn’t matter what they’re about, they just do. and all the girls ive ever kissed or done anything I shouldn’t say here because your parents might check – well all of them reminded me of you, in that they were all hopelessly lesser than you. its 3:03 now. I started this on my computer in Microsoft word at 2:37. and none of the words make sense when I read them back to myself. why cant I leave you alone? I can’t even tell if you want me to. I can’t tell anything. I just want this all to fade away. but I could never stand it if I didn’t talk to you ever again. I need to talk to you right now. I don’t know what ill do if I can’t talk to you on the phone in the next ten minutes. do you really care if I go to college? that’s what this was about in the first place, right? well Wyoming looks good. hows south Carolina?

I miss you Hayley
#2
holy shit man... an-hero


or, find a new chick, you'll eventually see that one person in this world doesn't mean nuthinnnn. hangout with some old friends, set up a strict work out regimen, eat healthy and you'll feel better in weeks tops. exhaust yourself to the point where it isn't worth thinknig about it and you'll soon forget it
#3
I'm not going to read this, but I agree with the above comment. OP: you're an hero.
Marshall amplifiers are the truest purveyors of rock and roll known to man.

"And give a man an amplifier and a synthesizer, and he doesn't become whoever, you know. He doesn't become us."

Holy crap, check this out!
#4
Quote by seemeel
I'm not going to read this, but I agree with the above comment. OP: you're an hero.


you really need to go back to /b/. we don't need you here.

anyway, this wasn't very poetic, there wasn't any real technique or flowery language applied, but i'm sure you know that. it was just honest, and it's something i relate to so much right now that it hurts a little to read. this is one for the diary and not the portfolio, but that doesn't make it any less affecting. thanks for posting.
#5
Touching stuff.
Seriously.
Like the guy above said.. it really isnt music or lyric,
butfor a moment it put me into the exact position you are in.

You will pull through..
#6
Quote by Marboo
Touching stuff.
Seriously.
Like the guy above said.. it really isnt music or lyric,
butfor a moment it put me into the exact position you are in.

You will pull through..


^ This. Comes from the heart.. We are all with you. It has this strange ability make you read until the end. May this post and our command help you!
Rainy Afternoon
Dark Punk Piece
Dead On The Sand
C4C
Member Of Paradox Empire (Singer/Guitarist).
Quote by T.s.e
Assholes aren't really more successful, it's just that they yell the loudest, therefore you notice them more than the nice people.
#7
I'm glad this isn't any kind of flowery. Thank you for posting something so honest. Can't say it's good writing, but I can say you're good human.
Quote by Arthur Curry
it's official, vintage x metal is the saving grace of this board and/or the antichrist




e-married to
theguitarist
minterman22
tateandlyle
& alaskan_ninja

#8
It's be a lot nicer if you added proper capitalization.

That being said, it was definitely an interesting and, in my opinion, memorable read. Nice work.