#1
'right I just scribbled this down on a note pad and I know what it means, but I'm not sure what it is, it started out as a song basis, but I think it kinda evolved into something else in my crazy mind, but here it be anyway lol, oh and c4c

===============================================

I'm passed by the slowest that I can see
Like a messed up creature in a long day dream
With no where quite to go, to fit in

And there's a crazy woman who is living oh, out the back
And everybody says, oh i'd tap that
But when I say it, it's just not the same

And then the 123 met the 456
We all had a fight it was won with a stick
And then a strange, but mellow air, ran arounf

And then we all pretended just to sit down stairs
While a special type of lazy it fell on deaf ears
And a sigh that's just louder than the moans

So don't be silly as you sit right there
Just know your the only one that thinkgs we don't care
Because everyone is a little bit blue

But since the blue it has been washed away by sin
I guess I'll have to think of another thing
To say when you're not around

Cause I'm a little bit crazy but you just don't know
About the way that my mind spins when I think of you
But that's cause I know, that I, Love you
#2
i like the concept.
could maybe use some more fleshing out.
but i'd have to hear it in action,
to make an actual judgment on it.

grade; solid "b" my friend.
i am the lamb.
point me to the slaughter.
#3
Quote by miloh.core
i like the concept.
could maybe use some more fleshing out.
but i'd have to hear it in action,
to make an actual judgment on it.

grade; solid "b" my friend.


That's the thing though, I don't think it'll work as a song for me, so I'm not exactly hasty to flesh it out more, when I say I wrote it in a note book, I mean like, mins ago. Thank's anyway
#4
I like to use pieces like this when I'm songwriting as my brain storming method to find images and potential sounds for new songs.

for me I like the lines

A Crazy woman who is living out the back

and I like the image "special type of lazy" that's a cool line

actually when I think about it you could easily combine the too ideas into a hook

She's a special kind of Lazy
Living out of the back of my car

etc etc I'm sure you get the idea
Last edited by jabbertooth at Jun 28, 2010,
#5
Quote by jabbertooth
I like to use pieces like this when I'm songwriting as my brain storming method to find images and potential sounds for new songs.

for me I like the lines

A Crazy woman who is living out the back

and I like the image "special type of lazy" that's a cool line

actually when I think about it you could easily combine the too ideas into a hook

She's a special kind of Lazy
Living out of the back of my car

etc etc I'm sure you get the idea


*Picks up notebook and starts looking through through all the lines*

That's a brilliant Idea.
#6
No prob...

She's a special kind of Crazy
Living out of the back of my car
A special kind of Crazy
Baby I don't know who you are
She's a special kind of Crazy
A little touched in the head
A special kind of woman
...

quick lyric
Last edited by jabbertooth at Jun 28, 2010,
#7
Yeah, I just picked something out of it as a chorus, Gonna flesh it out a bit now, get some solid verses and then get a little bit of music to it :-)