#1
This is a part of a song I'm writing.

It's untitled by the moment.

Verse:
I guess, that the spaces between my fingers,
were made so you could fill them in.
I know, how you felt last night,
cause i can feel it too.


We share, a moment forever,
though we might never meet again.
And if, we should find each other,
I would hold you through the night,
say what I feel is right.
Nothing can hurt you anyway.

Chorus: (Not finished)
Cause you're my angel without wings,
if you find love you gotta give,

What do you guys think?
#2
Seems like a cliche at this point, a love song...
I'd try to give some more rhyme to it, but that depends on what kind of music you'd want to go with it I guess..
I like it, but try to put more emotion or w/e in it, 'cause at this moment, it looks like a plain love song [to me], as if it has nothing special in it, nothing that shows that it's your song. But that's just me. ;P
"One bourbon, one scotch, one beer" *And one deadman, walking this land, with nothing, but a drink in his hand.*

C4C ?
And that's life , Empty Shell
#4
Well, I can't really tell ya, since I have no idea....this just feels like you've watched some romantic film or w/e and wrote it, I don't get the feel like you've put some emotion into it. Are you writing the song for someone ?
I don't know, maybe it seems to me like this, cause it's somewhat rhymed and isn't rhymed as well and that gives me a weird 'feel'.
Crit someone's song and ask for C4C, maybe someone else will give you a better opinon or explanation ;p
"One bourbon, one scotch, one beer" *And one deadman, walking this land, with nothing, but a drink in his hand.*

C4C ?
And that's life , Empty Shell
#5
Well in my opinion, I didnt get the feel of a love song. I got the impression of a one-night stand. Comparing MateusM's statement and mine, it means that your message is quite vague. Other then that, I like your word usage by not using complicated words to make the message even more vague.
#6
I was kinda with thinrocker on the whole one-night stand idea until I read the chorus. What you say gives me mixed ideas of what this piece is really about, which makes me believe that you didn't really have a clear plan when you started writing this.

Also, the "spaces between my fingers" line instantly brought 'Fireflies' by Owl City to mind. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it does show a lack of originality. I think you have a really good starting point for something, that with a little development could really be great.