The piano sounded horrible. Apart from that, I'm not a fan of rap but the instruments were cool. If it was instrumental I'd definitely listen to it again and again but the voice kinda over-shadows everything. A good idea you've got going, but I think the actual rapping could have some better production, and the piano definitely needs work on the sound. It sounds as if you've ripped it from a MIDI file or something, maybe produce it with a VSTi like Tru Pianos or something.

You definitely need a better beat than that to make this interesting. It's not a bad piano part and hip-hop ballads are always fun, but the track needs to have more "oompfh!!" and variation. The rap also needs to work on the flow, at times the delivery sounds hesitant. That might fit well with the subject matter but it makes the listener lose what little groove there is. In hip-hop production and flow is everything and this track has neither right now. Re-track and throw every production trick you have in there and it will be better.
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