#1
This is for a contest, so I'm on a deadline so it's definitely not perfect in my eyes, but I thought I'd see what you guys think of it. And even though it was unintentional, after I came up with about the first bar or two of the solo I started feeling a Marty Friedman/exotic vibe so I went for that. I'm not exactly sure what's going on with my time sigs in the intro, but i don't feel like changing it around, becuase since the guitar's alone when I play it nobody will be able to tell the subdivisions. And don't mind the little bit of drums, I started coming up with something but realized it would take me way too long to complete them. The bass is also pretty basic, but only using the bottom guitar strings as a bass I didn't feel like coming up with really unique lines either.


EDIT: Updated, though still no drums
Attachments:
git 2.gp5
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Last edited by bsoates at Jul 23, 2010,
#2
13 bar sounds like a mission imposible theme =D

30-44 I would make this part a bit more complex, something like DT style with open chords or smth

I'm pretty sure adding harmony/tiard/octave to the main riff in some parts would sound awsome

that's pretty much it oh and yea, a smoother transition in the intro would be nice
smile
#3
Something I don't understand in your song is that you begin with a catchy lead, use it here and there, but never develop it! Why not ? For me it's only somekind of weak transitions.
Here you can listen an idea of what you should do with this lead:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypCdGNe3Bvs

Also the end is bad. Try to remove bar 115. It doesn't fit here.

But the rest is really good. Nice work on leads. You have a solid song for a contest.

(From bar 83 it sounds like the Call of Cthulu/Hangar 18... and it definitely lacks drums.)
#4
Sounds like a video game theme lol, especially with instruments playing.

Alot of it was catchy, but the intro could certainly be a lot better. That lead lick in bars 1-4 that repeated throughout doesn't make any sense to me. I dunno how to describe it other than that it doesn't feel like it fits with the rest of the song. What I would do is completely remove the first four bars, and then before the main riff comes add a transition from the new intro into that so it doesn't start so suddenly.

The other leads are very good and don't extend for too long, with the exception of bar 25. It sounds great until bars 28/29, too much of a pause and it takes away a lot of the energy. I would just remove those completely.

The rest of the song is really great as I said, very catchy throughout with the exception of those spots I pointed out. I especially like bars 19-24.

Drums would probably make it sounds better too, like someone else mentioned.

Seriously though, and I don't mean this in a bad way, this should be a video game boss fight theme(maybe that's what you were going for?). Overall 8/10

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1340260
#5
Thanks for all the critiques guys. Some remarks/comments

For the intro, I'm just gonna delete the tapping part altogether and for now start with the main riff for the song. But should I straight up begin at the verse, begin with the two power chords before the verse, or begin with the first note of the rhythm guitar and have that whole bit before the verse?

In regards to the video game feel, well I wasn't going for it but knowing that the bosses' you are talking about are from japanese games and Marty Friedman's big on that style, and I tried to encapsulate some of his style....
Not to mention that the verse riff I felt a Paul Gilbert/Racer X vibe going, and Japanese are big on that stuff also...

Will post my update soon!
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#6
Yeah it flows a lot better now. The break in verse 92 still kinda feels off tho. I would just delete that measure. As far as the two power chords, it's good but imo it would sound better(after playing around with it a bit) if you went D5-G5 and used 16th notes instead of quarter notes so the pace is the same as the main riff. Sounds good either way though.

For drums you could just rip them from some Megadeth song and they probably wouldn't sound too bad

edit: And for the ending I think it would sound really cool if you ended with the 5-7-9-5-7 bit.
Last edited by guitarhero_764 at Jul 23, 2010,
#7
I liked the song overall, especially the technical aspects and the catchy feel.

The intro was terrible in my opinion but hopefully that is just guitar pro making it sound alot worse than how it would sound on a real guitar, unless your going for a sort of a nasty feel.

I liked the verse though i think it could use a lead guitar that is a little more different than what is already there, the harmonies sound extremely good but were a little to similar to what is already there.

The pre-chorus was good and i liked the lead guitar alot, it works really well and flows from the verse great.

I loved the chorus but i felt the transition between the pre-chorus and the chorus wasnt up to par with the rest of the song, it lacked the flow of previous chord progressions that makes the song feel natural. The chorus also has one other flaw in my mind, when you palm mute the 7 on the A string i feel like it should be more of a gallop rhythm rather than the eighth notes you have.

The transition between the chorus and verse did not work for me either, maybe with drums it will sound better but it was still missing something.

I liked the solo after the second verse but i think it was overall too fast, some fast riffs are good but i felt it was missing the slow catchy notes that connect phrases.

I loved how you ended the solo with the long soaring notes up high on the neck.

The following part was my favorite of the whole song, i just loved it, nothing to change at all.