#1
Wondering if this is epic enough.

I'm trying to mix Dream Theather, Meshuggah, Blotted Science, Cloudkicker, and Behold... the Arctopus all in one track. I've got the first two down...
Attachments:
Introduction.gp5
#2
nice!
it needs that synthetic feel if you want a Prog feel
I say you should add a guitar and syth melody that can be the theme to the song get me
overall cool intro
#3
Quote by XdeathcardX
nice!
it needs that synthetic feel if you want a Prog feel
I say you should add a guitar and syth melody that can be the theme to the song get me
overall cool intro


Yes it does need a synth. I was bringing in the chord backups from In the Presence of Enemies at the beginning, though I don't want too many elements of that brought in to the point where it sounds like a copy, that sort of leaves me with a dilemma...
#5
Quote by 4stringedMetal
boring


Reading your comment bored me. Especially the part where it was no help at all.
#6
That one riff was cool at first, but the more you repeated it, the less impact it had from a listener's standpoint. And to be honest, it was a pretty cliche' riff to begin with.
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#8
Drums weren't good, they need rewriting.
My songs are all located here .
Feel free to drop by and crit a song.
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Colossus
#9
Quote by COBHC728
That one riff was cool at first, but the more you repeated it, the less impact it had from a listener's standpoint. And to be honest, it was a pretty cliche' riff to begin with.


I was hoping the backup would change that. The solo backup riff will probably be different, it's kind of hard to write a solo over it without it sounding out of place.

Now for being cliche', either I write riffs that are so hard to follow (Atonal Tech Metal), or ones that are easy to follow. I'm trying to do both in one track, so it will move from being cliche' to completely unheard of (that's basically where the Behold the Arctopus influence comes in). The middle doesn't satisfy me as much, I'm not sure why, but I never manage to reach that middle.

Quote by frankibo
Drums weren't good, they need rewriting.


I thought the drums were the best part. In what way do they need rewriting?
#10
Quote by WizMystery

I thought the drums were the best part. In what way do they need rewriting?


Well the tom rolls at the start were fine but when the riff proper comes in the sporadic cymbal hits prevent the riff from really flowing and getting a good rhythm.
My songs are all located here .
Feel free to drop by and crit a song.
Leave a link and I'll return a crit



Colossus
#11
Quote by frankibo
Well the tom rolls at the start were fine but when the riff proper comes in the sporadic cymbal hits prevent the riff from really flowing and getting a good rhythm.


I see. The cymbals were placed on beats other than the first beat to make it interesting, but they are a little loud and take up the riff.
#12
It's a bit hard to crit so little, but anyway.

It wasn't a bad effort, just not what I expected.

I can't see anything Epic or Progressive about it at all.

It is a pretty cliche' riff, I was expecting a less generic picking pattern considering the influences you mentioned.

I agree with you, the drums were the best part.

Crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1304686
#13
Quote by Kade2910
It's a bit hard to crit so little, but anyway.

It wasn't a bad effort, just not what I expected.

I can't see anything Epic or Progressive about it at all.

It is a pretty cliche' riff, I was expecting a less generic picking pattern considering the influences you mentioned.

I agree with you, the drums were the best part.

Crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1304686


Of course it isn't progressive yet, it's just the intro, there's no way it could have possibly progressed anywhere. The mix of DT and Meshuggah are there, not the others, so that's maybe why it wasn't what you expected.

I'll be glad to crit yours.
#15
Quote by WizMystery
Of course it isn't progressive yet, it's just the intro, there's no way it could have possibly progressed anywhere. The mix of DT and Meshuggah are there, not the others, so that's maybe why it wasn't what you expected.

I'll be glad to crit yours.



=S I have heard progressive intros before.

Anyway, It will be interesting to hear it when you've finished it =)
#16
Quote by WizMystery
Of course it isn't progressive yet, it's just the intro, there's no way it could have possibly progressed anywhere. The mix of DT and Meshuggah are there, not the others, so that's maybe why it wasn't what you expected.

I'll be glad to crit yours.

This counteracts your argument there.

I'll update with a crit later.
#17
Are we all on the same page that this is the introduction to a single track?

Maybe "first riff" fits this better.

I'll get to the crit on your upload soon, Kade. I want mine to be in depth :P
#18
Quote by WizMystery
Are we all on the same page that this is the introduction to a single track?

Maybe "first riff" fits this better.

I'll get to the crit on your upload soon, Kade. I want mine to be in depth :P


Yeah, "first riff" as the title would have been more appropriate.

If you have any full length songs I'll return the favor =)
#19
Quote by Kade2910
Yeah, "first riff" as the title would have been more appropriate.

If you have any full length songs I'll return the favor =)


I'm new at writing guitar pro tracks so I don't really have anything finished.
#20
I mean its pretty simple, if you want to sound like Cloudkicker use more synth and guitar layers, that riff can go somewhere but there needs to be some riffs throw in between to make it interesting, if you want it more like Meshuggah it needs to be way way more syncopated and the drums need improvement as stated above. As of right now all I am hearing is Dream Theater.
#21
Quote by BoTpBeAtMh
I mean its pretty simple, if you want to sound like Cloudkicker use more synth and guitar layers, that riff can go somewhere but there needs to be some riffs throw in between to make it interesting, if you want it more like Meshuggah it needs to be way way more syncopated and the drums need improvement as stated above. As of right now all I am hearing is Dream Theater.


Dream Theater never uses riffs like that o.o
#22
Just trying to help. It just sounds to me like something Dream Theater would play, you don't have to be pretentious about it. It actually sounds nothing like any of the bands (except Dream Theater) you mentioned because its just way too simple and boring.
#23
Quote by BoTpBeAtMh
you don't have to be pretentious about it.


What... are... you... talking... about?
#24
Quote by WizMystery
Dream Theater never uses riffs like that o.o


I was referring to this statement, you just sounded like a dick. Dream Theater uses plenty of riffs that somewhat resemble the riff you used.
#25
Quote by BoTpBeAtMh
I was referring to this statement, you just sounded like a dick. Dream Theater uses plenty of riffs that somewhat resemble the riff you used.


I...

How did I sound like a dick? All I was doing is mentioning the fact that Dream Theater doesn't use riffs like the one I used, and there was another influence in there...