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#1
Inspired by coreysmonster thread.

Is it better to be unattractive? Now, I'm not talking about troll ugly or anything, just someone you wouldn't give a look back if you were passing in the street.

reasons.

1)This way you wont have people talking to you just because of your looks. You'd need to develop a fairly good personality and character to hold your own against the attractive individuals.

2)You would be a lot more free to date who you'd like to, because you wouldn't have to worry so much about social conventions. Lets be fair, attractiveness is relative, isn't it? As in a 60 year old has know problem marrying another 60 year old.

3)If you do manage to bag yourself a beautiful woman/man at least you know that you're getting the full package. they're clearly not a shallow or fickle person. You'd also know why she took and interest in you in the first place. Because you're interesting or whatever.

I have some more reasons, but i want to know what you lot think.

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#2
i think plain is attractive in itself. average is supposedly attractive because it's the "norm" and that's what we apparently strive for.
but i think it's probably better to develop a better personality rather than living a fake life and realising it when it's a bit late.
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#6
I'm in the mentality of 'I am me. Don't like me. I don't care'

some people don't like it. some people do.
but I don't generally date, not really interested in that at the moment, more interested in making sure i do well at uni and get the grades i need
i'm Ginger its fun
#7
I don't get why attractiveness is linked with being stupid so much on here. I'd say more of the ugly people i know have bad personalities and i find them more boring. Of course you're going to get a few mint girls that are morons and don't have a clue about anything, but being attractive doesn't mean that you're stupid and fake.
#8
Quote by Burningritual
I don't get why attractiveness is linked with being stupid so much on here. I'd say more of the ugly people i know have bad personalities and i find them more boring. Of course you're going to get a few mint girls that are morons and don't have a clue about anything, but being attractive doesn't mean that you're stupid and fake.



I 100% agree, mate. But when you're attractive the world is your pony isn't it? people want to do stuff with you and be near you. That shit is inevitably going to change your personality.

Not a rule though...Not a rule at all.

Quote by Karl Pilkington
Jellyfish are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful."
#9
But what about if people don't talk to you anyway? Then being plain/unattractive just cocks that one right up
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#10
well attractive just means that you like the person doesn't mean that they have to have the perfect face,body or whatever it's whatever perks your interest for that individual... most of the time it's the personality and the mood and what not that does it for people but they make sure that their not marring a goat or something.... it's just whatever that certain person likes in the other individual
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#11
They're some good reasons, and I agree that real love and a real relationship is built on personality and what you have in common, not just because they are both good-looking people. But an old saying I heard is that 'looks catch the eye, personality catches the heart'. And this is true, it helps to be slightly attractive(I'm not talking best looking person in your year type, but just not that you can't be looked in the eye due to your ugliness) so you can catch the eye of someone, but then your personality must do the rest to make the other person love you.
#12
If you're a guy, definitely. If you're a girl, it's a bit more questionable. I only say that because girls are less appearance-oriented in regards to the opposite sex. If you're confident, witty, secure, and funny - or even just one of those things - you can bag just about any girl. If you're a girl and you aren't noticeably attractive your choices become much more limited. But then again, you may avoid most of the douchebags that way. So I dunno, maybe it does even out; though, either way I'd say in the long run that it is an advantage to be "plain."
We're only strays.
#13
1)This way you wont have people talking to you just because of your looks. You'd need to develop a fairly good personality and character to hold your own against the attractive individuals.

Surely you would develop a better personality by talking to more confident, better looking people? You would in turn become confident, witty and feel good about yourself.

2)You would be a lot more free to date who you'd like to, because you wouldn't have to worry so much about social conventions. Lets be fair, attractiveness is relative, isn't it? As in a 60 year old has know problem marrying another 60 year old.

If you are attractive then that definitely helps to get a date. Of course you need a good personality too but I'm sure being attractive offers a wider spectrum.


I can't fault your third point, I agree with it! I just can't imagine why anyone would rather be unattractive instead of good looking. In my eyes it offers alot more oppertunities that you would have to work hard at if you were ugly. There may be more attention on you coz of your looks but most people seem to have a confident outlook on themselves and this isn't really a problem.
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#14
I'd rather date an avaeragely attractive girl any day of the week over a ridiculously hot girl.
#15
Quote by richie7410
They're some good reasons, and I agree that real love and a real relationship is built on personality and what you have in common, not just because they are both good-looking people. But an old saying I heard is that 'looks catch the eye, personality catches the heart'. And this is true, it helps to be slightly attractive(I'm not talking best looking person in your year type, but just not that you can't be looked in the eye due to your ugliness) so you can catch the eye of someone, but then your personality must do the rest to make the other person love you.



Jesus. "so ugly you can't look them in the eye"

Can i use that in future?

Quote by Karl Pilkington
Jellyfish are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful."
#16
I'm ugly, and it's fucking awesome.
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#17
Quote by Jiggzy.UK
Jesus. "so ugly you can't look them in the eye"

Can i use that in future?



Go for it.
#18
Great, another debate starter
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#19
one other thing i'm pretty shy so i only tend to speak to people if i know them, which makes getting to know people quite difficult, and I'm at uni studying music, part of it is performance, so at the performances this year (they're open to the public) this girl who likes me came to watch, obviously she knew i was shy so she stood out of my eyeshot (I tend to stand to Stage Left so she was at stage right) and when I've got my guitar I'm not shy at all, I'm all over the place and really confident, she couldn't understand that and got really angry after just yelling at me because,
quote
"You're really confident on-stage, yet when we hang out you're shy as anything, even your best friend hadn't seen that side of you and she knows you better than anyone"

am i weird?

or is shyness in RL different to confidence in a band.... but that seems to make people go away with me. and sometimes i dont want them to.. i know i look like a picasso painting :/ but still
i'm Ginger its fun
#20
Quote by Jiggzy.UK
As in a 60 year old has know problem marrying another 60 year old.


Some would have even less problems in marrying a 19 year old.


It does help to be attractive, in some ways. It shouldn't, but it does, especially if you know how to use it.

People who are mentally hollow and shallow can cruise through life on their looks.

Although saying that, ugly but brainy people can get far to, it just leads you down different paths.
#21
Quote by Bearded_Seth
I'd rather date an avaeragely attractive girl any day of the week over a ridiculously hot girl.


Same
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Man, thank God the russians created UG. Otherwise, how would I have gotten this information?
#22
Honestly, in a perfect world, it wouldn't matter if we're beautiful or not, people would take interest in us for whom we are. Sadly, this isn't true. I don't consider myself pretty in any sense of the word, but i'm not going to call myself ugly either, having said that, girls don't approach me, and if talk to them, they usually just don't want to get to know me, weird thing is that if they do, i usually get told "you're amazing", sadly, it's only in a friend manner.
#23
Everyone is ugly in their own way.

I don't know if it's "better" to be unattractive. Being beautiful has some clear advantages and disadvantages (not that I'd know). Plain people don't really have any advantages or disadvantages, none based on their looks anyway.

I don't know if that made sense.
#25
Quote by Jiggzy.UK
1)This way you wont have people talking to you just because of your looks. You'd need to develop a fairly good personality and character to hold your own against the attractive individuals.


I wouldn't really say this is a general rule or anything. Attractive people have attractive personalities, that's what makes them attractive. Sure there's alot of girls who are just physically attractive, but then again they'll mostly attract tools.

Quote by Jiggzy.UK
2)You would be a lot more free to date who you'd like to, because you wouldn't have to worry so much about social conventions. Lets be fair, attractiveness is relative, isn't it? As in a 60 year old has know problem marrying another 60 year old.


I don't know if people think like that, I haven't really found it to be so.

Quote by Jiggzy.UK
3)If you do manage to bag yourself a beautiful woman/man at least you know that you're getting the full package. they're clearly not a shallow or fickle person. You'd also know why she took and interest in you in the first place. Because you're interesting or whatever.


Hopefully you're interesting, or it's gonna be a short marriage
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#26
Quote by Sparky-MMA
one other thing i'm pretty shy so i only tend to speak to people if i know them, which makes getting to know people quite difficult, and I'm at uni studying music, part of it is performance, so at the performances this year (they're open to the public) this girl who likes me came to watch, obviously she knew i was shy so she stood out of my eyeshot (I tend to stand to Stage Left so she was at stage right) and when I've got my guitar I'm not shy at all, I'm all over the place and really confident, she couldn't understand that and got really angry after just yelling at me because,
quote
"You're really confident on-stage, yet when we hang out you're shy as anything, even your best friend hadn't seen that side of you and she knows you better than anyone"

am i weird?

or is shyness in RL different to confidence in a band.... but that seems to make people go away with me. and sometimes i dont want them to.. i know i look like a picasso painting :/ but still



Nah, you're not weird, you just have your confidence peaks at weird times. But if that girl really liked you, then she would have given you a chance. If she saw the confidence you have when you're on stage, then she knew that confidence was in you, you just don't know how to show it when you're off stage. Anyone who knows these two sides of you probably understand this.

You're lucky though, I'm the complete opposite. I'm quite confident off stage, despite my bad looks, but as soon as I get a guitar in my hands with several people around, I just freeze up and mess up a lot, and make myself look worse than I am.
#27
Quote by Sparky-MMA

am i weird?

or is shyness in RL different to confidence in a band.... but that seems to make people go away with me. and sometimes i dont want them to.. i know i look like a picasso painting :/ but still


i have the same thing, but why did she get angry?
#28
Well,I have to say I'm not "ugly" but I am a little overweight so that it self is really a deal breaker with the girls,and because of that I have developed a funny, respectful, caring personality.Unlike my friend who is "good looking" and has a bad personality,at least concerning women,he thinks he can play with their emotions and their heart just because he can.But needless to say....he get's all the pussy
#29
At least concerning people who aren't shallow or tools, I've found that self-confidence and personality are much more effective in attraction than just looks alone.
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#30
Quote by MatthiasSch
i have the same thing, but why did she get angry?



because i'm not like that offstage. i just sat there let her rant on then got up and walked away.
i'm Ginger its fun
#31
Quote by Sparky-MMA
because i'm not like that offstage. i just sat there let her rant on then got up and walked away.


Mate, it's obvious why you're confident on stage.


It's because you know you can play guitar well, you're sure of yourself. You clearly don't think you're as good at talking to folks as you are at guitar.

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Jellyfish are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful."
#32
I feel like plain people (such as myself) are more likely to be thrown into the friend zone much quicker than the attractive people so that could be a major disadvantage. Plain people do generally have a better personality though so i guess it really just depends on how quickly you make your move
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#34
I think the odds are in your favor if you're attractive. it seems that people are more willing to approach someone they find attractive, or who is generally considered to be aesthetically pleasing.

if you're unattractive, sometimes there's a feel of desperation that draws the wrong kind of attention.
Last edited by MakinLattes at Jul 25, 2010,
#35
Quote by RobinTrower12
This
Same here.

And, you can't develop a personality.
#36
Quote by Jyrgen
Same here.

And, you can't develop a personality.


Yes you can.

Quote by Karl Pilkington
Jellyfish are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful."
#38
Quote by Jyrgen
How?


I'd bet that you're probably a different you now than you were 6 months ago. Who you are is constantly changing based on shit those goes on around you....IMO

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Jellyfish are 97% water or something, so how much are they doing? Just give them another 3% and make them water. It's more useful."
#39
^this
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#40
Quote by Jiggzy.UK
Mate, it's obvious why you're confident on stage.


It's because you know you can play guitar well, you're sure of yourself. You clearly don't think you're as good at talking to folks as you are at guitar.



This is true, the only thing that does annoy me is the last girlfriend i had broke up with me on the grounds that 'I was sleeping with my best friend' her reasons for thinking that were

1, i spent more time with Emma (best friend) than Kerri (ex gf), which is true, the fact that me and Emma are at the same uni, on the same course, studying the same modules, and in the same band, means we spend upwards of 50 hours per week together, but me and Emma are like brother and sister. so that one sorta failed.

2. I wasn't as quiet with Emma. which is true but when you spend all day with someone you tend to get to know them well enough to be yourself. we're both shy so we both get uneasy with new people so at the start of uni we sorta gravitated towards each other, and became inseperable within a few days.

so maybe thats it, my best friend is holding me back...
i'm Ginger its fun
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