Now that's a powerful start.

The B part makes me think you would make a fine djent composer (are you into bands like Periphery and fellsilent?), but I would take the build-up section away if I were you: it seems kind of pointless after D. Great song, hope to hear more from you soon.
My name is Jagayama. I spin for a living.
Great song.

Good to see someone actually using interesting rhythms and chords. and a rhythm backing that isnt just strumming.

41 is great. Reminds me of a local/friends band, Elora Danan.

B also rules. Didnt like the high register chords coming in.

Noooo a breakdown?

Eeriness is goood. Piano is used amazingly.

'Piano Breakdown?!?!' haha. my thoughts exactly. should put that where the old generic breakdown is.

Layering on C is really good.

Lead could be alottt better on D.

Cutting out the build up and going straight the to Big Finish works much better. 'Cause the big finish is rad.

Now just put a good screamer and a beautiful vocalist over this and the kids will go crazy haha. If thats what youre going for.

Ill give you something to crit once the PHC comp is over.