I don't know if this is in the right forum, but it didn't really seem to fit into any of the other categories so here it is:

A little background:

Myself (guitar), two of my close friends (bass and drums), and a rhythm guitarist that I didn't know too well formed a band for a school talent show awhile ago. We were looking for a singer, so we picked up a "new guy" - a friend of my bassist's that he knew from our high school's theater department. After playing the talent show, we decided to become a full-time band and ditched the freshman rhythm guitarist because he could never make it to rehearsals. At first we took the direction of a jam band but recently decided to start recording some of our stuff.

The new guy brought his $3k PRS guitar to the first day of rehearsal, and, without a word, started trying to weasel his way into the role of lead guitarist. He pried direction of the band from me and my bandmates, and began to demand that our jam band record note-for-note covers of some of his favorite songs. He got us to agree to "Pinball Wizard", and we had our first rehearsal while our drummer was out of town. That night we were at the new guy's house, and he spent the entire time that we were there glorifying his multi-million dollar guitar rig and criticizing my acoustic guitar technique while pitching low-shots and veiled insults at me under his breath so that the bassist woudln't hear. The night ended with him literally escorting me to the door, apparently for fear that I'd somehow manage to steal some of his dad's precious equipment out from under his nose.

A few days ago, we had another rehearsal, this time with the drummer at his house. The new guy showed up, put down his equipment, then realized that he couldn't find his mic. As he walked out the door to look for it in the street where he'd unloaded his gear from the car that dropped him off, he said aloud "Fine, I'll go look for it, since I'm the best thing that ever happened to this band." Our drummer wasn't in the room, but the bassist and I heard it and we weren't surprised when the new guy came back with the mic, and, seeing the looks on our faces, tried to pass it off as a "joke." The rest of us decided to let it slide and we turned on the mic and began to play. About half way through the song, the new guy lost his place and missed about three lines of lyrics, but kept it rolling and picked back up a few lines later. That didn't bother me at all.

After the key change towards the end of the song, the bassist cued him in and he started singing, but despite the printed lyrics in front of him, screwed up the first line of the last verse, then tried to repeat it two or three times, causing the rest of the band to lose our places and the entire song to fall apart. Three of us stopped, but he kept singing and I had to stand up to catch his attention and get him to stop. I calmly explained to him that when he makes a mistake, he can't pick up the same line again and again and expect the band to realize what he's trying to do and repeat that part of the song. At first he didn't acknowledge his mistake, but after I tried to explain the situation again, he lost his cool and screamed "BUT I FIXED IT" with all the awkward rage of an angry 14 year old kid. At this point, I dropped the whole calm, understanding thing, told him to calm the **** down, and, when he opened his mouth again, looked him dead in the eye and said "don't you dare yell at me, kid." That shut him up pretty well, after which we both apologized and he decided to take a "break" and abscond with some soda from the drummer's refrigerator. The drummer compared the general atmosphere at that point to the band equivalent of "daddy hitting mommy in the kitchen", and when the new guy came back from his break, he finished the night with a compete and total lack of enthusiasm.

After rehearsal, I called the bassist and drummer up, and we agreed that we should sit the new guy down as soon as he walks through the door at our next rehearsal and explain that what happened last time can't happen again. We plan to set some terms, make them clear, and, if he doesn't agree to them, for the drummer to tell him to get the hell out of his house. What do you think?
Bandleading forum. Link to it has already been posted.



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