#1
older poem i found. may do more with it. may not.


spelunking near Happiness Pt.
a cave that swirls beneath Jameson Lake,
soot-stained corduroys,
weird blue sweater,
some colored moccasins-
it reminds me of when we’d
climb up our chimneys as kids-
when we got to the top you’d always smile and
ask for a boost, and I would gladly do it,
so naively fascinated with the soft feel of your
upper legs-so anxious just to give us a little
push...
Last edited by rushmore at Aug 13, 2010,
#2
this is lovely. I wonder about that "us" in the 2nd to last line, as opposed to "you".
#3
Do more with it. Yes, that's a compliment.
the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones that never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn


#4
jordan- i went back and forth with 'you' and 'us' before i went with us. still kind of undecided though.

cobre- thanks, i haven't decided what to add yet, if i do.