#1
Does this make any sense?

How did he do it?
With a straight face
Nothing but aces
Left in the hole
A damaged soul
Always being
Brought Down
Just so others
Could get around

Where was he?
as a child
When teachers
told
him stories of love

How did he?
rise above
the pain
heartaches
bring
Last edited by bjonesapostle at Aug 22, 2010,
#2
it makes more sense than, say, the beatles i am the walrus.
music is the only protection from the woes of the world; a citadel it shall stand evermore
#3
It makes enough sense to put in a sing, why wouldn't it? It's just that it ends rather abruptly. You could add something to it or just take e.g. the last 4 lines from your first verse ("always being" to "could get around") and add at the end and I'd say you have a finished set of lyrics.
#5
it does make sense but i really dont know wat the "no ace" line was suppose to have meant and ya the ending needs some changes. overall its good! keep on writing
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I write poetry
And it sucks.
#6
Quote by leafwhisperer
it does make sense but i really dont know wat the "no ace" line was suppose to have meant and ya the ending needs some changes. overall its good! keep on writing


Obviously about a poker game where the player lost because he didn't have an ace. Duh!
#8
Quote by Riffdex
Obviously about a poker game where the player lost because he didn't have an ace. Duh!


hahaha wonder why i didnt think about that
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I write poetry
And it sucks.