#2
Cool stuff here man! Only a few gripes that I feel I should point out: the intro just wasn't anything strong or interesting, it's definitely the weakest point in the song and I feel it needs some work. Also, I notice you tend to take an idea, tweak it/vary it in some way, then repeat the more simple version again. This works out really well, but the fact that you do it for almost every riff in the song makes it wind up stale and doesn't keep things as interesting.

Overall, good and it has a lot of potential. Nothing new for the genre, but it sounds nice. 7.5/10

C4C?!
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1355368
We can only guffaw at all the humbug we are told about martyrs.
#3
Where are all the comments for this song?

I agree with the intro needing some tweaking. Maybe you could keep the breakdown but have one of the guitars play something a little different, even if it's just for the last 8 bars. Just a suggestion.

The chorus is definitely the best part of the song, it flows really nicely and the two guitars harmonize well. Then you've got that awesome lead that is first played at 25, it fits extremely well and just sounds perfect.

I don't really get the build-up part, it just feels like a big waste of space that interrupts the song, but maybe that's just me. I can see it being fun to do live at least. Nice melody afterward though.

c4c if you'd like https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1357217
You will bow at my feet or I'll rip out your knees

and make of your face all the carnage you crave
#4
ok, the intro is pretty standard.good drums

chorus sounds good, wait, a genre change ? i dont understand it but it still ends up sounding good.

the breakdown sounds good but the chug chug after it, you really want it?
it almost is sounding like coldplay with lamb of god, if u know what i am talking about.

build up, as someone said, is waste of space, maybe use fillers ?

circle of pit is veryyy good part and flows into the chorus/outro smoothly.

c4c ? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1357307
#6
I really like the lead around the chorus part. I think you nailed that riff spot on. The start of the song left me a bit uninterested, but the chorus definitely caught my attention. Definitely think it could start of a little better. Solid drums man. Props on that. The breakdown would definitely get to pit moving. I liked it, it just needs more OOMPH, though i'm not quite sure what exactly that is. haha. I really dug it though, not trying to give off the impression that I didn't.

Oh, mind dropping by my thread and giving me an honest opinion?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1358380
Last edited by metalfanatic at Sep 6, 2010,