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#2
A kid walked to the front of my class and took a shit on the floor, picked it up and threw it at some hot girl in the front row. I threw up all over the ground.
grok it.

SKREAM!

Listen to jazz, it's good for you...
#4
me and some friends made fun of my teacher's family today. it was hilarious although him and his wife were there.
E-married to BlessedRebel15
Most Attractive Female 2011 ^^
Dark Black Rivers in the WinterTime
Quote by CrunchyRoll
I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but everything is against the rules at UG
#6
A bunch of black kids stood around a piano and started playing and singing and got the entire cafeteria singing along.
Schecter Hellraiser C7 FR/Bareknuckle Cold Sweat/Liquifire
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#7
Quote by :Vicious--
me and some friends made fun of my teacher's family today. it was hilarious although him and his wife were there.


My friends and I.

Maybe if you spent a little time learning instead of being an ass to your teacher...
Keep you doped with religion and sex and TV
And you think you're so clever and class less and free
But you're still fucking peasants as far as I can see

A working class hero is something to be.
#10
My history teacher told me in depth about snorting some cocaine at a Grateful Dead concert in the seventies.

I've only know him for two days.
#12
Quote by shaggydogJV
A bunch of black kids stood around a piano and started playing and singing and got the entire cafeteria singing along.

Why did you have to point out they were black?

But uh, seeing my head teacher fall over was fun. Personal highlight so far, picture the scene:

In Maths class, it's about a week before our final exam but we're doing random mental exercises. Our teacher is a huge, overweight Jamaican man. Lots of the class weren't doing any work, not seeing the point. This includes young Simon; a small, ginger, glasses wearing nerd. All of a sudden, our teacher loses his temper and bellows at Simon: "SIMON! Why ya not doing ya work Simon!?!?!". Silence fell for a split-second but from the back of the room you hear quite boldly, Simon shout "Because it's bollocks!!!".

The class erupted with laughter...
#14
Quote by Epicbizzjizz
My friends and I.

Maybe if you spent a little time learning instead of being an ass to your teacher...

lol nah. isnt that what they are there for?
E-married to BlessedRebel15
Most Attractive Female 2011 ^^
Dark Black Rivers in the WinterTime
Quote by CrunchyRoll
I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but everything is against the rules at UG
#17
Quote by Epicbizzjizz
My friends and I.

Maybe if you spent a little time learning instead of being an ass to your teacher...



dude its the internet. **** grammar, and **** grammar nazis


does my, lack of correct punctuation confuse you!


anyways mines not really funny, you'd have to see it

me and some friends(take that grammar nazi!!) were talking and we proved the teacher wrong somehow(it was a few years ago, i dont remember how) and then the teacher sat at his computer for the rest of the period with a depressed look on his face. and did the same thing for the next 2 days.

again, not really funny... whatever.
#19
Quote by JacobTheMe
So I assume that you are from a country that stops its education after third grade right?



america? yes, yes we are.
#20
Quote by rickyj
dude its the internet. **** grammar, and **** grammar nazis


does my, lack of correct punctuation confuse you!


anyways mines not really funny, you'd have to see it

me and some friends(take that grammar nazi!!) were talking and we proved the teacher wrong somehow(it was a few years ago, i dont remember how) and then the teacher sat at his computer for the rest of the period with a depressed look on his face. and did the same thing for the next 2 days.

again, not really funny... whatever.


No, but it makes me not respect you.


And I'm not a Grammar Nazi, but if he's being a complete jerkoff to a teacher and can't even type, maybe he should contemplate pulling his head out of his ass.
Keep you doped with religion and sex and TV
And you think you're so clever and class less and free
But you're still fucking peasants as far as I can see

A working class hero is something to be.
#21
Quote by Epicbizzjizz
My friends and I.

Maybe if you spent a little time learning instead of being an ass to your teacher...



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#23
not the funniest but still pretty hilarious...

this kid in my german class kept farting. so of course the whole class kept laughing, but he kept doing it. the teacher was laughing at the kid too (sadly) but she didnt know what to do because he was disrupting the class, but she couldnt really tell him to leave the class because of a perfectly normal thing.

she even said " hahaha i really dont know what to do right now, they never trained me for a situation like this "
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Quote by crazydiamondII


hendrix was good but he did nothing to change popular music's path.
#25
Quote by Epicbizzjizz
And I'm not a Grammar Nazi, but if he's being a complete jerkoff to a teacher and can't even type, maybe he should contemplate pulling his head out of his ass.

dude, i was doing it for fun, not be an idiot. my teacher's pretty cool and let things like this slide. im not asking for any problems or anything, so lets just chill.
E-married to BlessedRebel15
Most Attractive Female 2011 ^^
Dark Black Rivers in the WinterTime
Quote by CrunchyRoll
I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but everything is against the rules at UG
#26
Quote by :Vicious--
dude, i was doing it for fun, not be an idiot. my teacher's pretty cool and let things like this slide. im not asking for any problems or anything, so lets just chill.

Your teacher is in the fetal position right now drunk of his ass on whiskey, probably after abusing his wife. You feel good now?
#27
Quote by genghisgandhi
Your teacher is in the fetal position right now drunk of his ass on whiskey, probably after abusing his wife. You feel good now?

Don't forget about molesting his sweet, delectable children.
Tonight I kill your fucking face.
I killed your face.


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#28
Our computer teachers PRIVATE computer is at the back of the lab. One day he was checking peoples projects and he'd seen mine..... so he was looking at others and i wandered around and happened to come to his PRIVATE computer which happened to be on at the time, and the only computer with internet in the lab. So i just glance at the monitor..... He's downloading Twilight. What the hell. I might just add here, he's the thickest teacher in the whole school.
Signatureless. And this doesn't count. Because I said so.
#29
Me and my friends used to shit and piss on the senior jocks lunch table. Then our other friends in their grade used to tell us how they would go to class and hear them complain that their bags smelled.
lol guitar
#30
I took AP music theory this past year. We had a class of 6. I kid you not, the day before the AP exam, during some final review, this conversation took place between the teacher and someone in the class who just didn't get it.

Teacher: "How many sharps are in the key of C?"
*Silence*
Teacher(surprised):"Well?"
*Long pause*
Student:"6?"
Teacher's facial expression is one of absolute shock
Student:"uhh... 2! Dammit!"
Other student:"How many squares are there in the key of C?"
*Everyone in the class is, at this point, chuckling slightly at the question, which was an obvious joke
Student:"3!"
We took the AP test the next day. I got two 4's and a 5. I feel like I don't have to ask him what he got.
#31
Quote by RipeFlesh
Don't forget about molesting his sweet, delectable children.


Quote by silent caution
When i was younger i used to pee in peoples shoes and blame their dog
#32
My friend broke the front grille of his truck while demonstrating how another friend miraculously had done a jump roll across the hood while it was moving without breaking anything.

Last year my astronomy teacher blew up a water bottle with dry ice and water in a trash can outside... every single class period for 2 days. The boom could be heard throughout the entire school.
#33
A guy was pissing about in class, so the teacher told him to go and stand by the door for the rest of the lesson. After a while, he lifted the door off it's hinges and walked off with it.
🙈 🙉 🙊
#34
i was in the back of french class, and was bored, in my own world. for some reason, i was staring at my ruler, which said "shatter resistant" on it, and for some reason i doubted the manufacturer's honesty, so i bent both sides down to see if this would happen, and it snapped in the middle; shattering and being projected across most of the room (i was at the back). Everyone turned round and asked what the hell happened, and i just said that clearly companies can't be trusted ith promises they make.

Not that funny, you'd probably have to be there...more making an arse of myself, but w/e. school wasn't that funny for me
they're coming to take me away
ha-haaa
Last edited by Banjocal at Sep 1, 2010,
#35
Quote by Epicbizzjizz
My friends and I.

Maybe if you spent a little time learning instead of being an ass to your teacher...


Maybe if you spent a little time doing something useful with your life instead of being a grammar Nazi on the internet...
#36
It's sad how innocent threads end up as arguments. get a f*cking life.
they're coming to take me away
ha-haaa
#37
a shop teacher set fire to the school by sucking up saw dust into the ventilation, and this kid i know feinted during the moment of silence during remembrance day, it was so ****ing hilarious
#38
Quote by dubstar92
A kid walked to the front of my class and took a shit on the floor, picked it up and threw it at some hot girl in the front row. I threw up all over the ground.

awful
#39
We were back in the dorms, and I threw out this old battery that wasn't working anymore. My friend picked it up and started messing with it, he got his scissors and was prying it open.

He eventually got the metal covering off, we heard this loud CRACK and the battery falling onto the floor, and him clutching his hand going "ooooowwwww".

Funny shit.
An Augmented 4th or a Diminished 5th?


Quote by I.O.T.M
You, fine sir, have impeccable taste.


Ahhhh Yuck Fou.
#40
2 years ago a guy ran across the stage during assembly wearing a tutu and a pair of short shorts only and and yelling "FREEDOM!!" in front of a high school of 1600 people.
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