#1
outside an irish pub in manhattan
i smoked two cigarettes
just to pass some time
spoke to a girl from st.louis
she had a husky voice
by the last drag she was close
and she asked me was i single
without thinking i told her
yes but i am in love with a girl
and she is lovely and amazing but
she will never really be mine so
i like to have sex with random girls
and dream about her every night
i waste with someone else in my arms.
and then i thought of you,

across the ocean telling your boyfriend
to guess what you wished for at 11.11pm
but he didn't dare to guess and so you never told him.


me.
#2
i thought this was great, man. of course you're talking about something thats very relatable to a lot of people but i thought the way that you executed it was exceptional. there was a tangible sadness in the directness of your words. you were simply narrating events and weren't making any judgments on them and i think it really created this isolated, distant feeling. the contrast between the feelings i know you must have about this situation and the way in which you presented them was jarring, if that made sense.

i have one qualm. the title. i feel it gives away too much. it took a little something away from my reading experience because i feel like i knew what you were going to get at before i even got there.

but other than that, this really struck a chord. great stuff
here, My Dear, here it is
#3
You are swiftly moving up the ranks of 'people to watch for', I think. Your stuff keeps getting better and better. I love the vividness of the scene you illustrate, and the emotional resonance that results. Great stuff.
kill all humans
#4
i can't say any more than the above two. they pretty much hit the nail on the head.

great piece.