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#1
Ok Pit I need some major advice here: I recently learned that two weeks ago my friend who's a girl was basically sexually assaulted. I just got the full story out of her tonight, but I guess she was at her boyfriend(though not officially)'s house with one other guy late at night, they pulled out vodka, the two guys got totally wasted, she had two shots. Eventually she tried to leave but they told her not to drink and drive so she stayed, that's when shit got bad, they both climbed on her and started taking of her clothes. She resisted and now has two very large and prominent bruises on her arm and leg respectively. Throughout the whole thing she kept trying to leave, the other guy present not really taking part as much and seemingly on her side when the boyfriend left but then doing nothing to stop things either. I won't go into all the details but they forced into doing a lot of things she didn't want to, all of them ****ed up. She finally got away but not after her "boyfriend" snapped an undisclosed number of pics. Fast forward to last Friday when I first found out, evidently the boyfriend has threatened to release the pictures and the other friend forgot everything, although he heard about it afterwards. There's probably around 7 of us that know everything that happened, and we don't really know what to do. Half of me really wants to just beat the living shit out of both of them at school tomorrow but the semi-rational half knows that we need to do something more serious. The problem is, she wants us to do absolutely nothing and forget that it ever happened, but for me personally there's no way I'll be able to go to school with them for two more years without doing ****ing something. So what do I do, confront them with the people who know what happened and give them what they deserve, tell her mom and let her family deal with it or go to the school counselors or cops? Advice is much appreciated.


tl;dr, a good friend of mine was sexually assaulted two weeks ago by two guys I know, one has threatened to blackmail her, she doesn't want us to do anything, what should I do?
#2
is she hot?

Actually, use the evidence as EVIDENCE and call the cops.

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Last edited by WyvernOmega at Sep 6, 2010,
#3
just leave the part about her out and it turns into two guys having gay sex.


awkward
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Last edited by I am wet : Today at 03:26 XM.
#4
Quote by I am wet
just leave the part about her out and it turns into two guys having gay sex.


awkward

Why the fuck is everyone misspelling "ackward"?

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#6
Are the pics only on his phone? Steal his phone and smash it. If they're on his camera/computer, make friends with him and get close to his stuff and delete the pics. After the pics get deleted, call the cops. He'll get registered as a sex offender and have his life semi-messed up (which he deserves)
#7
Quote by guylee
you know, for a fee I can take care of this little problem for you.

i say you pay UG's ignorant bastard. just a feeling
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#8
Go to the cops. Blackmail and Sexual Assault, they'll have a custodial for that definetly.
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#9
Quote by I am wet
just leave the part about her out and it turns into two guys having gay sex.


awkward

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Your post was the only bright spot in this disgusting piece of thread.

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I waited for the rape.

...


...but the rape never came
#10
Police.


That is the only answer. Get their lives ****ed up for doing a terrible thing.
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#11
Quote by WyvernOmega
Use the evidence as EVIDENCE and call the cops.

This. Definitely this. Rapists are very high on my list of people who barely qualify as human, those two deserve whatever they get in prison.
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one of the best, educated and logical posts I've ever seen on UG in the Pit. Well done good sir.
#12
Do something. I have a friend who was being abused by her boyfriend. We pretty much have proof that it was going on but she kept insisting nothing was happening. They've broken up but I still bad for not taking some sort of action.

Don't let this turn into something you'll live to regret.
#13
Coppers definitely. If you do nothing they'll probably just do it again, and trying to beat them up won't solve anything.
#14
1. Get her to say she was molested to cops
2. Get search warrant
3. Find incriminating pictures
4. ???
5. PROFIT!

skip #2 if needed

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#15
Quote by zaidsharifi
Are the pics only on his phone? Steal his phone and smash it. If they're on his camera/computer, make friends with him and get close to his stuff and delete the pics. After the pics get deleted, call the cops. He'll get registered as a sex offender and have his life semi-messed up (which he deserves)

delete the evidence? what would the police go on then...
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#16
indeed, call the police and report him. if she under 18, thats child porn and sexual assault on a minor. hes ****ed.

if i was you id convince her to call the police herself.
#17
Alert the police.

I guess you could try and kick their ass, but really, alert the police. If you pull that kind of shit, then people need to know.
#18
wow.....people are really ****ed up man.
I feel bad for your friend, she didn't deserve that, but as to what you can do, it seems to me that you would have enough to get the little bastards thrown in jail.

If it really happened the way it did, and shes being honest ( im not calling her a liar but i wasnt there) then go to the cops man, have all your other friends who know about it go with you, tell them the truth and they will do something about it. both of them will be arrested, thrown in jail, and hopefully assraped by a large black man named citrus.
#19
He does have the pictures on his phone, I also have first period with him tomorrow so I could steal it then if I can restrain myself from punching his abusive ass in the face, but my friend is really adamant that we do nothing at all, I know it's for her own good that we turn them in but she's going to be right pissed if we do so. Is it worth possibly sacrificing our friendship for justice? as weird as that sounds
#20
Quote by :Vicious--
i say you pay UG's ignorant bastard. just a feeling


yessssss. they will go away for a long time.

GEDIT: TS, I was actually in a similar situation as you. I strongly advise you go to the police or her parents. She may hate you for a while, but eventually she will figure out that you did it in her best interests and it will most likely strengthen the friendship.

GEDITTHESECOND: Oh holy **** dude you live in Colorado too I really COULD help out.

for a minimal fee of course.
Last edited by guylee at Sep 6, 2010,
#21
Police as soon as possible, man.
As the one guy said, don't turn this into something you'll regret.
Even if she says don't do anything, I think you need to.

They should have their nuts nails to a tree stump and let the girl push them over.
#23
talk things over with her, let her know youre really there for her and if she doesn't seem to want help, tell her that your are going to tell her parents, in a non threatening way. she might hate you for it, but someday she'll know why you did it. its better that way than to be a lousy friend and just let it go. talk to her, her parents, and then the cops. talk it over with those people. it will be tough, but its probably best. hope things turn out ok for all of you.

(remember: if she was brave enough to tell you in the first place, she's asking for help. maybe she doesn't really realize it, but she is and she trusts you.)
Last edited by tweak24 at Sep 6, 2010,
#24
let him publish the pictures if you have to...sounds cruel and terrible but that would be the dumbest thing those two assholes could do. then they prove themselves that they have this evidence and incriminate themselves.

but before that i would go to the police...shit isn't right. if you say nearly 10 people know, you could do it anonymously.
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#25
i hope were not forgetting that extortion (blackmail) is a crime here, on top of sexual assault, i would just mention that to the kid tomorrow and see how quickly he deletes the pictures. i would refrain from "beating his ass" because nothing good will come out of it and its not really your battle to fight, especially if your friend told you to let it go
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#26
Theres really not much you can do. Telling the police and getting all that kinda stuff involved will just be harder on the girl. I have been in the same situation as you, TS, and although it sucks, it's a lose lose situation. There is no good outcome.
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#27
Quote by Porto
He does have the pictures on his phone, I also have first period with him tomorrow so I could steal it then if I can restrain myself from punching his abusive ass in the face, but my friend is really adamant that we do nothing at all, I know it's for her own good that we turn them in but she's going to be right pissed if we do so. Is it worth possibly sacrificing our friendship for justice? as weird as that sounds


Yes.
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#28
Notify the police, especially before something worse happens. if you say he has pictures then there is one big shot against him right there.
#29
Call the cops. They HATE sexual assault suspects. Hopefully they'll get jail time, where maybe they'll be the ones in her position next time. As for the girl, she'll most likely not want to involve anyone and try to "forget" it... That usually doesn't ever work out well for her. So do the right thing.
#30
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Yes.

Agreed. She'll forgive you eventually if you do, but good luck forgiving yourself if you don't.
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one of the best, educated and logical posts I've ever seen on UG in the Pit. Well done good sir.
#32
Alright thanks a ton you guys, I'm definitely going to the cops at some point but the other thing is she's now trying to play it down like "they didn't do any real harm" and "I didn't technically say no". And that bastard already asked her when she'd "do it again" >
But can I still get him on stuff if she's not willing to testify? Say worst case scenario is he deletes the photos and she doesn't say anything. I really don't wanna leave this guy out there to do the same thing to other people.
#33
Convince her to tell her parents, have said parents call the police, and every one of you who knows should then be there for her through all this shit.
#35
I cant believe all the jack ass comments here. someone has just been the victim of a violent crime that can/will change their life forever.

I was once in a similar situation with an old friend.

1 believe me i know you want to tear out the throats of the guys, but honestly that wont help. you will be marked as the bad guy. anything you say about the assault will be looked at as just an excuse to get out of trouble.

2 contact the police, with or without her. someone needs to do something, if nothing is done they get away with a disgusting crime, which in turn can lead to it happening again.

3 when you do call the police (there is no if you NEED to call) give them everything you can.
all the information about what happened, victims name, and of any evidence that you know about.

4 the longer she waits the worse it will be and some or all the evidence will be lost.
#36
Definitely go to the police. The sooner they know the sooner they can get their hands on the evidence. If she has any emails, text messages etc that incriminate him she needs to keep them as well. One thing though... are you absolutely sure that your friend's version of events is accurate?

EDIT:
Quote by Porto
Alright thanks a ton you guys, I'm definitely going to the cops at some point but the other thing is she's now trying to play it down like "they didn't do any real harm" and "I didn't technically say no". And that bastard already asked her when she'd "do it again" >
But can I still get him on stuff if she's not willing to testify? Say worst case scenario is he deletes the photos and she doesn't say anything. I really don't wanna leave this guy out there to do the same thing to other people.

This is why I asked the question. That does not seem like a great case to me. Although she should have to positively consent to the sexual contact, her story is getting less clear. He certainly doesn't seem to see it the same way you do. Is there a chance she was making up a story because she was embarrassed about what she did and the photos that were taken? May sound like an asshole question, but better to be asking it now than in court.
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Last edited by catempire at Sep 7, 2010,
#37
Do the right thing. Don't do what I did. Don't beat the kid up.
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#39
Quote by catempire
One thing though... are you absolutely sure that your friend's version of events is accurate?

What kind of question is that? This girl was clearly raped. You don't need to go stirring that up. TS, don't ask this question. It WILL make things worse if you do.

Edit: Sorry if I sound like a jackass; just I don't think asking this will help.
#40
I'm with everyone on this but if SHE doesnt want to say anything to the cops or admit anything to the cops there is nothing they can do. All they have is the word of a 3rd party not coming from the victim, and they are going to really press her for the details and that isnt going to be pleasant. Telling her parents, or a school counselor is a good idea but first i think you really need to talk to her get her to realize that what happened to her is a PROBLEM. If she is still really persistant about not doing anything then I would say tell her parents then you've at least done your part in making this known and maybe they can talk some sense into her about contacting the police. She's going to be mad at you but eventually she will realize that you only had her best interests in mind.
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