#1
For all the burned books and
burned buildings and burned cities
and their ashes all their ashes
all their ashes underground layered between rock
(the rock signifies peace)
(or the rock signifies lack of fuel)
(or the rock signifies that everyone's killed their enemies
or the rock signifies that fire doesn't exist yet
or the rock signifies a stoning)


(or the rock signifies a colder type of hate)


, for all these burned things and all these burned
people(and people things),

what is human thought

what is human thought

what is human thought

whatishuman

(but the rocks will one day give them diamonds)

, but burning or a colder type of hate?
Today I feel electric grey
I hope tomorrow, neon black
#2
Interesting, for sure.
Treble>Epiphone Prophecy EX - MXR micro Amp - MXR Blue Box - MXR Fullbore - MXR Noise Clamp - Vox AD30VT
Bass>Ibanez BTB505 - MXR Blowtorch - MXR D.I. - Peavey MaxBass 700 - Peavey TVX410
#4
Quote by Ganoosh
For all the burned books and
burned buildings and burned cities
and their ashes all their ashes
all their ashes underground layered between rock
(the rock signifies peace)
(or the rock signifies lack of fuel)
(or the rock signifies that everyone's killed their enemies
or the rock signifies that fire doesn't exist yet
or the rock signifies a stoning)

My one gripe with this is that I can't read it without rambling in my head due to the lack of punctuation. If you meant to give it a sense of urgency, or perhaps the feel of a rambling nut, amazing job. If not, I'd add some punctuation. (Not saying it's bad either way, I just have trouble finding a flow.) I especially like the parts in parenthesis.


(or the rock signifies a colder type of hate)

Strong, simple line. Classic Ganoosh.

, for all these burned things and all these burned
people(and people things),

what is human thought

what is human thought

what is human thought

whatishuman

(but the rocks will one day give them diamonds)

, but burning or a colder type of hate?

I love the "and people things" bit. But I feel like the last line is a little weak after such a strong, strange piece.


An awesome piece as usual. You've really gotta stop hoarding all the talent, you've got plenty to share!

Anyway, not much else to criticize here. Keep up the always great work.
#6
I'm not too fond of this.
You've a unique style that I've come to know and love, but this is a bit exaggerated.
To the point that it's just a mess.
#8
Quote by Ganoosh
For all the burned books and
burned buildings and burned cities
and their ashes all their ashes
all their ashes underground layered between rock
(the rock signifies peace)
(or the rock signifies lack of fuel)
(or the rock signifies that everyone's killed their enemies
or the rock signifies that fire doesn't exist yet
or the rock signifies a stoning)


(or the rock signifies a colder type of hate)


, for all these burned things and all these burned
people(and people things),

what is human thought

what is human thought

what is human thought

whatishuman

(but the rocks will one day give them diamonds)

, but burning or a colder type of hate?



I lol'd.
#9
reading the next few. youve got something bubbling in your stomach, i can feel it
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