does anyone have recomendations for a small, cheap electronic practice drum kit or something for a drummer to practice on thats not too loud?

my metal band practices in our dorm and the drummer has been using bongos, and we want to give him a somewhat more legit instrument. any recommendations?

Nope, no drummers there.
They made me do push ups in drag

I'm gonna have a really hard time if we're both cannibals and racists.

Don't dress as a whore, he'll thump you.

I'm a firework, primed to go off
No, all the drummers were killed in The Great Cleansing.
...Stapling helium to penguins since 1949.