#1
I try to sleep, but there is something stopping me. I'm still not sure what it is that keeps me awake, but i'm pretty sure its you. I lay with my eyes unable to close, trying to think of ways i could a better person. For you. Not for me, not for anyone else. Just for you. For months I've been trying to prove myself and hide myself at the same time. I never once thought of the consequences, until now. I never even wondered whether or not doing that was even possible, until now.
I've come to realize that rolling the dice and hoping for doubles is better than sitting and waiting for an unfound courage to give you the strength to take a gamble.
As hard as it is for me to get up and out of bed with all of these heavy feelings of uncertainty, there is something that keeps me looking ahead. Maybe it's the thought of getting to see your face as it jumps out at me from fifty feet away. Or maybe it's anxiety from the thought of feeling your fingers intertwine with mine. Whatever it is, it's the best and worst feeling I've ever known.

I've never really needed any direction in my life. And now, after attempting to climb a monument of innocence, truths and emotion, i have finally been hit by a realization;
my blind eye may prevent me from seeing what's ahead and above me, but my functional eye points me to the ground and shows me a path that brings me to you. If I'm only right about one thing in this ****ed up world, it's this;

The path that leads me to you, is the path that will lead me home.