Shaharz
DAH KEWL GUY
Join date: Jan 2007
921 IQ
#1
Hi.

So, as some of you may know from my last thread , I am currenty working on a concept album.
It's going pretty well, but I'm currently stuck on song 8 and nothing I do seems to fit, so I decided not to force it and work on improving an older song in the album that I feel can use some work.

This is song 4 called "Will Of The King", the plot here is basically that the king wants to have sex with a beautiful woman in the kingdom, so he asks her and she refuses because she is married. Since the king is not used to refusals, he rapes her.

It's supposed to be a pretty-fast fun song with a bit of bad feeling in the air. Hope you like it.

C4C and all that.

EDIT (10/15/2010):
Version 2 is up. Due to popular demand the BRUTALLL part is out and I add a new thing instead. It's still kind of a draft but I'd like to know your opinion
Attachments:
will of the king.zip
will of the king2.zip
Last edited by Shaharz at Oct 15, 2010,
MobiuZ
Registered User
Join date: Nov 2009
1,119 IQ
#2
first of , i loled when i read the song description

As for the song , its great ! i love it ! really gave me a maidenish feel with the melodies and such , great work ! only thing i would change is the volume of track 2 in verse 2.

and the brutal part wasn't really my thing and didnt really fit in with the rest of the song imo , and the solo was a little generic

other than that there is not much to crit other than that its great !
Last edited by MobiuZ at Sep 27, 2010,
lanzaa
Feliz sería que hora
Join date: Jul 2006
745 IQ
#3
loved it. that is all.
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Kämpfer
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2009
736 IQ
#4
Quote by lanzaa
loved it. that is all.

Yeah, pretty much this.
Shaharz
DAH KEWL GUY
Join date: Jan 2007
921 IQ
#5
Thanx guys

MobiuZ, I actually like the fact that track 2 is taking over in the second verse, it kinda gives a static-noise feeling.

What didn't you like about the brutal part? The riff itself or just the hole idea of having a brutal part in there?
The riff isn't my best work, I know, but I kinda like it. And the brutal part is a must for concept reasons :P
Wquennasar
Melancholic
Join date: May 2010
423 IQ
#6
Haha, nice description.

I absolutely loved Riff 2 and the Chorus. Very Maidenesque/heavy.

Solo was pretty cool.

Love what you did with Track 6 after the solo.

I really disliked Verse 3 and above that, the BRUTALLL part. It just doesn't have any place in here. I know you have your theme/concept going on and all; but musically, it just makes a good song worse. The solo is dark-ish enough for your rape scene =P

The verse/chorus are very catchy, my favorite part(s) of the song.
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Kirborg
Registered User
Join date: Dec 2004
267 IQ
#7
I like it. However distasteful this may sound, the song fits in with the theme of rape and all those antics you described. Especially verse 3 you can almost picture the raping taking place right before your eyes.
ihavenoname93
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Join date: Aug 2008
1,222 IQ
#8
i liked it, but ive gotta say the brutal bit doesnt fit at all. i understand its in there for a concept, but it just doesnt work imo
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MetaIronForce
ULTIMATE-DISNEY
Join date: Oct 2009
904 IQ
#9
The "BRUTAL" part is horrible, maybe remove it and replace it with a guitar solo or something.
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Last edited by MetaIronForce at Oct 10, 2010,
Shaharz
DAH KEWL GUY
Join date: Jan 2007
921 IQ
#10
Alright, since pretty much everyone hates the brutal part, I created a different version with just some cool riffs and shit instead. Still pretty basic IMO, but I hope you like it.

Uploaded it to the first messege. And this is still C4C - But please post a link to your piece cause I hate looking for it ><
Kämpfer
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2009
736 IQ
#11
Aw, I really liked the brutal part

Checking out the replacement now...

EDIT:
HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. Dude. Way better. ****ing epic.
Shaharz
DAH KEWL GUY
Join date: Jan 2007
921 IQ
#12
Haha, thanks dude. Glad you liked it.

I'm still not sure about 2 things:

1. Should I add something on the keyboard for the new part or leave it like this?

2. The way the new part connects back with Riff 2 doesn't feel natural. I don't really have an idea what to do there. Sure I'll come up with something though.
kylendm
Baronboi
Join date: Aug 2006
8,191 IQ
#13
Lol I wish I could crit this better but it so good.

Bar 197 sounded kinda off though. But RAPE was totally my favorite part of the song.

Very bad ass!
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Eastwinn
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Join date: Dec 2008
3,131 IQ
#14
You gave me crit a while back that I never repaid.

This is not my style of music at all so I'm not fit to give proper criticism, but I did enjoy it. Riff 2 had a lot of energy, and RAPE had a good rhythm that really peaked my interests. The guitar solo had a few awkward spots but was way better than expect (solos on this forum rarely sit right with me). I hope this bump gives you a few more listens.
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