#1
Inspired by my morning. Taking a greyhound to Ottawa and I missed my original train. The train I took got me to union at 6:20, with my greyhound bus leaving at 6:30. Thanks to an amazingly clutch taxi driver I got on my bus at 6:29.

So pit, share your stories of incredibly close calls. I need the entertainment, this trip is brutal.
#2
Well the phone rang once and the voice was like "r u wit my daugter!!?!?!" n i ask my grl n she lik "my dad is ded!!!" but then who was phone?


Quote by Våd Hamster
Find a dice and assign a number to each girl. Throw the dice.


The number you hope for at the moment you throw the dice, is the one you'll want to keep.
#4
Quote by MossyMan
Oh a greyhound is a bus company, now I get it

Yeah, I'm going from toronto to ottawa which on the bus takes 5 and a half to 6 hours. I tried sleeping but its too bumpy and shit, and my woman is already legit asleep.
#5
I was shaving my testicles once and slipped, lucky for me it was a minor slip and just cut a bit of skin, deffo didnt want my teste sliding across the floor......it was newly fitted.....the floor that is
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#7
Well, once me and my athletes group went to Milano, Italy for a week of intense training and when we were about to fly back we had lunch at a McDonalds at the airport and I had my plane tickets on the tray and then I had to go to the WC and of course I had forgotten that my tickets were there when I came back so I just threw them in the thrash along with all the other garbage on the tray. Then, 1 hour later, 3 minutes before we should board the plain I start looking for them and realise their gone, so I ask the nearby personnel what I should do and they tell me I have to go back all the way to the entrance of the airport to talk to somebody, well I rushed there as fast as I can, but when I came there they just said that it was too late and there was nothing they could do, I would have to buy new tickets and wait for the next plain to Finland which left the next day. In desperation I sprinted back to the boarding gate, getting stopped in the security control on the way, they probably thought I was some crazy bomber trying to run past them or something, anyways I make it back like 5 mins after the plane should have taken off and one of the personnel was really nice and called the pilot or something and convinced him to let me onboard and it worked! That was pretty damn close!
You'll Never Walk Alone!
#9
So I was standing near the phone and it rang, boy that was one close call.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#11
I was balls deep in the girl and I was about to ejaculate, but luckily I pulled out just in time.

That was a pretty close call.
#12
Quote by slash_GNR666
I was shaving my testicles once and slipped, lucky for me it was a minor slip and just cut a bit of skin, deffo didnt want my teste sliding across the floor......it was newly fitted.....the floor that is


Why were you shaving your testicles?

Ladies love hair.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#13
I woke up an hour late to work but my manager had a hangover and was 1 1/2 hours late


Now I am an hour late almost every Monday morning
#25 for top 100 UGer of 2009
UG's 2nd Funniest UGer and 3rd most likely to be a Serial Killer of 2009, 2nd of 2011
#14
Well today I went to the bus stop to catch a bus, and I was there 20 minutes early and the bus was 5 minutes late. that was a pretty close call in my opinion
Quote by jibran
I go to the pit only to just look at your creepy perverted username.


My Tumblr
#15
Quote by GbAdimDb5m7
Why were you shaving your testicles?

Ladies love hair.


I like to feel the wind
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#17
Quote by slash_GNR666
I like to feel the wind


So you walk around naked?

It is not like your testicles will be showing most of the time, you will be clothed.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#18
Quote by GbAdimDb5m7
So you walk around naked?

It is not like your testicles will be showing most of the time, you will be clothed.


doesn't everyone?
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#19
Quote by slash_GNR666
doesn't everyone?


Hairs on your testicles are a sign of manliness, me and my friends used to compare testicle hairs to see who is the better man, I won usually because I am very hairy.

You are not a man.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#20
testicles don't have hair.
You who build these altars now

To sacrifice these children
You must not do it anymore
#21
Quote by the bartender
testicles don't have hair.


I just checked, I'm pretty sure I have hair on them.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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Free Will Swanson
#23
Quote by shmikeyboy
You have hair on the scrotum

I checked, I have hair on the nutsack itself.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#25
Quote by Hasok
So...this is a testicles thread now?

A hairy testicles thread.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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Free Will Swanson
#26
Quote by the bartender
testicles don't have hair.


Mine does. Long, brownish hair.
I am a postmodern vegetarian, I eat meat ironically.
#27
Quote by Toolshed#9
Mine does. Long, brownish hair.

Is that a challenge?
I have more hairs then you.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


Free Jani92jani

Free Will Swanson
#28
Quote by GbAdimDb5m7


You are not a man.


you are not the man son, your 6 years younger than me
Quote by lambofgod127
btw im in hs and im almost 18 so if u do think she was flirting with me dont say that its wrong im almost a grown man.




༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ WE ARE ROB ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
#29
Both shaved and hairy ballsacks have their advantages. I don't know how you guys can put a sharp object near your manberries though.
#30
Quote by Thrashtastic15
Both shaved and hairy ballsacks have their advantages. I don't know how you guys can put a sharp object near your manberries though.


I would never risk such a thing as a razor near mine. But I trim on occasion, usually pre-party, when there's a very small chance of gettin' some.
#31
Quote by Thrashtastic15
Both shaved and hairy ballsacks have their advantages. I don't know how you guys can put a sharp object near your manberries though.

It's easy. I have the nerves of a surgeon, but the muscle spasms of someone with Lou Gehrigs disease.
#32
Quote by slash_GNR666
you are not the man son, your 6 years younger than me

I have the testicle hair of a 30 year old, son.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


Free Jani92jani

Free Will Swanson
#33
Quote by FrauVfromPoB
I would never risk such a thing as a razor near mine. But I trim on occasion, usually pre-party, when there's a very small chance of gettin' some.


I have shaved my balls with a razor several times.

What can I say, I have nerves of steel.
I am a postmodern vegetarian, I eat meat ironically.