#1
Ok, so.

Last night, I took my mate out in my car (The UGer 'thenextkirk92') and we were cruising around town. At an intersection, some lights went red, so I stopped. There were some prostitutes to my left hand side, but i thought nothing of it.


The lights went Green and I stalled my car. They all laughed at me I got laughed at by a bunch of chlamydia ridden meth addicts

I felt like an idiot. When was your last time?
RIP Tom Searle.
#3
The lights went Green and I stalled my car. They all laughed at me I got laughed at by a bunch of chlamydia ridden meth addicts



If a hooker laughs at you, all you have to do is gently remind her that she will never find love due to her line of work.
Quote by pielover375
So last year, I put some potatoes in this jar and forgot about them. Today, I found them, and when I opened the jar, there is a puddle at the bottom and it smells like alcohol. If I drink this, do you think I will die, or have I made potato vodka?
#5
nothing yet but my friend and i were at a party and they said they were sophomores and my friend said oh cool me too and after a little while of talking to them he turned and whispered "oh shit they meant college" lol after i proceeded to lol and we got really really drunk
#6
yesterday in my calculus class.

Today was better..
Grammar and spelling omitted as an exercise for the reader.
#7
All day, every day.
R.I.P. M.C.A.
Tweet at me bro
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that joke regarding your username was NOT originally posted by blake1221. That was a Gunpowder original.

I INVOKE SOPA TO SMITE YE FOR THIS FALSEHOOD.
#9
After we broke up, i felt stupid since i actually thought i still had a chance after a so called "brake" took place.

and on the lighter side, cought myself double checking the fridge for drinks...three times in like 10 minuts *facepalm* like it would fill up in some magical way and suddenly juice would turn up
Listens to Jazz

Quote by Local666Union
each time I piss in the dark I'm afraid that some wierd plant is going to eat my dick



#10
When I cut myself shaving.


"Hey man what happened?"

"Well I sliced open my face by accident, no big deal."
Blog Of Awesome UGers.
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I seem to attract girls.
Which is annoying, cos I'm a girl and I like cock.

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Being an idiot should be illegal too.
#11
everyday. stupid stuff happens to me all the time.
E-married to BlessedRebel15
Most Attractive Female 2011 ^^
Dark Black Rivers in the WinterTime
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I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but everything is against the rules at UG