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#1
(..i should say this is all completely true..i wish it were a normal situation, but its not)

So i met this American girl a month ago. Never met any American girls before. Very attractive, amazing outgoing personality..super intelligent, charity worker. Never met anyone like her..ever. After this, she tells me the next night on our second date she had 25 operations..had various organs removed etc. She cant have children. That night she also tells me she dated girls when she was at Uni. We go to a club and the whole place checks her amazing dance moves out..she tells me she was a stripper to pay for medical bills..now she is in 200k of debt due to not getting medical insurance.

She moves to Scotland where im at, to get free medical cover..her parents live here. Her ex cheats on her during her near death operations, and when shes here house hunting for them, tells her and keeps her possessions. She tells me during date 2, she wont have sex for six months due to the former betrayal.She asks me during our third date if i would go on holiday with her to New York.

So we see each other for another week or so..most days for a short time. Next, she asks me if i would move to the states with her. She tells me she was raped when she was 22. She says she couldnt date guys hene the girls dating, stripping and strongly feminist issues. She then tells me the next week she was also raped at 17..tied up and filmed etc.

So we are seeing each other for 3 weeks, she tells me her work are going to sack her due to her sick days due to medical conditions. She cant get any decent job due to her absence records in employment, so she is going onto benefits to help her. I am also in financial problems, so we decide to rent together for financial reasons. During this she tells me she loves me. We have sex..she freaks out during it due to the rape stuff.

So this weekend, she takes ill..cancelled all weekend plans to help her out. She goes to hospital, they put her on morphene and various other stuff. The conditions are chronic, and can at best be stabilised. She tells her friends she would like me to be the father to her foster children.

So now a month in, i am totally fatigued and havent told anyone i know, due to the highly personal situation. Ive never met anyone as nice, intelligent, talented, funny and beautiful physically as her. I do love her for who she is now, i would like to be with her for the rest of my life, and potentially have foster children with her. I can't be without her. However i have major worries and concerns.

What would you do?
Last edited by Sir-Shredalot at Mar 20, 2011,
#4
I really, really, don't know what to say.
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#7
Get the hell out of there. Seriously, it's only going to end badly for you.
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#11
You are a good man, but keep in mind. A situation like that never goes right. Eventually she's going to beat you with a dildo during sex then dominate you in the bedroom.
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#13
Quote by chaos13
Too crazy, not worth it.


+1

go ahead and fall in love. learn the hard way like everyone else did and will continue to do. but you'll kick yourself in the ass over this one day.
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#16
You should follow your best instincts, I suppose.
There really isn't very much anybody from The Pit can say, and probably nothing you should listen to.
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Last edited by bodyheatseeker at Mar 20, 2011,
#17
Quote by primusfan
+1

go ahead and fall in love. learn the hard way like everyone else did and will continue to do. but you'll kick yourself in the ass over this one day.

Everyone have to learn some day, they know it's going to end badly, they have to do it though.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#19
Think. Can you handle this? Now that you've been with her, can you be without her?

If you can handle the mountain of shit and don't want to be without her, then stay with her. If it's too much for you to handle, sit her down and talk to her. Tell her that you really do have feelings for her and that you've never met someone like her, but that you just can't deal with all of the issues. That's the truth, right?
#21
One night stand
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#22
Cynical me says "it's not worth the stress you're going to cause yourself trying to take care of her. You only live once and all this is going to interfere with whatever you're doing in life"

Hope in humanity me says "You only live once. You'd be doing her a big favor by giving her the attention she needs that most people would hesitate to give her. You'd be a good person"

I also remember there was a video documentary on youtube about some girl with a chronic disease. She only had a few months to live and some guy became her girlfriend and they did everything they could together. She died and the guy never regretted it. Of course they were teenagers though.
Last edited by metaldud536 at Mar 20, 2011,
#23
Quote by chaos13
Too crazy, not worth it.



nothing else needs to be said.
trying to piece his 2 and 2 together
#24
Allow it, she seems a bit fucked up.
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#27
How sure are you that she's not just full of shit?
You've only been together 3 weeks and you've moved in together?
She's probably just trying to get a visa
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#28
Its good that you listed her most serious problem first.

I stay away from american girls like the plague
#29
Quote by --ESTRANGED--
any chance you got to see said video?

I know you're joking, but that's an awful thing to say.
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#31
Quote by Sir-Shredalot
havent told anyone i know, due to the highly personal situation.


So you tell hundreds, if not thousands of angsty teens..

lol

But you might have to ditch this one.
Unless you have the soul and patience of a saint.
#32
That was well......wow......

But yeah follow what you think is right, you don't need a bunch of horny 13 year old's making important life decisions for you.
#33
Quote by Domino
How sure are you that she's not just full of shit?
You've only been together 3 weeks and you've moved in together?
She's probably just trying to get a visa


It's possible that she's full of shit, but it would be wrong to act on that possibility/assumption. A friend of mine was going out with a girl, and after a month she told him that her brother had raped her from age 9 to age 16. My friend liked her, but he couldn't handle it. It's okay to break up with her, but don't think she's lying, and don't assume the worst. Because in a situation like this, if you're wrong, you've done some irreparable damage.
#34
Quote by trueamerican
Think. Can you handle this? Now that you've been with her, can you be without her?

If you can handle the mountain of shit and don't want to be without her, then stay with her. If it's too much for you to handle, sit her down and talk to her. Tell her that you really do have feelings for her and that you've never met someone like her, but that you just can't deal with all of the issues. That's the truth, right?


i would like to be with her for the rest of my life, and potentially have foster children with her. I can't be without her
#36
First, i feel sorry for you. You're clearly going through a lot.


I can only tell you this: a couple years ago i dated a girl who has been raped when she was young. So i know what you mean, to a certain extent.

She had trouble getting intimate with me, and for me that's a really important part of a relationship.
So i told her exactly that and we decided to break up on mutual agreement. We're still friends, and we don't put aside the possibility of getting back together in the future, once she sorts out her problems.

My advice is, since you seem to really care about her, help her through this rough patch.
When things are stable, sit down and have an honest talk with her, explain to her your concerns, your plans for the future, etc.
Then make a decision together, based on your conclusions.
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#38
she sounds crazy. abandon ship.

she needs to work through some of her issues. youre not going to be able to help her with that. youre just going to get in the way of that.
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#39


She's allowed to be crazy if she's equally or hotter than her craziness on this scale.

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#40
Look out for number 1
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