#1
This is my first post to this section of UG so here goes. Any criticism is much obliged.

Time Is...

An astronaut,
Alone for weeks,
Surrounded by nothing,
Except the infinite.

A dark moon,
Outlined by the night,
Waxing/full/waning,
A dark moon

A shadow,
On a sundial,
Circling around,
Always returning to start.

A passing-by/One second,
A fleeting glimpse/Two seconds,
A never-ending thought/Three seconds,
Four seconds/A missed opportunity.

An ocean tide,
Rising up,
Only to come back down again,
Only to break and be forgotten.

Forever.
#2
This was great, I really liked it. I liked how sparse this poem is but yet it is very intricate and paid good attention to detail, I feel. I didn't like how this ended with 'forever'. At first, I wasn't sure what to think of the last stanza, but the significance is there.

Overall, this was an enjoyable read. Stick around
#3
About the "forever" line, the idea was to end it abruptly with something that time is that can't exactly be explained like the other stanzas, if that really makes any sense. Other than that thank you. It was much appreciated.
#5
first stanza is weak, second one a little off to me ( i wouldn't repeat "a dark moon" not word for word anyway).
got a lot better from there.
i don't like the last word. pointless.
overall decent with sevidence of intelligence. keep it up
I want Super Saiyan abilities