Just some quick impressions of this song please, I know my voice sucks and that it's overall a bit rough but it gets the gist across. My main instrument is guitar but I play bass too, the drums are garageband presets.
Now I'm walking the empty solemn streets
Casting down the shadows of my defeat
You look at me as if I'm throwing my life away
Well I'll tell you now, I'm not a fucking hyperbole.

Very nice man, great lyrics, only crit would be the formentioned vocals... try some double tracking and bring them forward in the mix a smidgeon.