#1
In working and waiting;
pouring; running;
walking;
subsisting,
there is little to no room
for time travel and
vivid evocation.

In bringing ends together
to conjure new ones,
we are sunburned
and ill.

“Holy water for
holy people,”
I’ve got a well of it,
I swear.
Close your eyes and hold out your hands,
part your lips,
give away solace,
please.

Revere a landscape
of all and any kind
because it’s better
than this.
Last.fm


"Art is always and everywhere the secret confession, and at the same time the immortal movement of its time."


#2
In working and waiting;
pouring; running;
walking;
subsisting,

This totally throws off the beginnig for me. Maybe i'm just not reading it right. But i feels like it should rhyme but just can't find a way. But it's not my piece so i don't entierly know.

there is little to no room
for time travel and
vivid evocation.

I absolutely love these lines, the word choice is terrific

In bringing ends together
to conjure new ones,
we are sunburned
and ill.

Same as above, great word choice and awesome imagery.

“Holy water for
holy people,”
I’ve got a well of it,
I swear.
Close your eyes and hold out your hands,
part your lips,
give away solace,
please.

I see nothing wrong with this at all. I like the lines, "I've got a well of it, I swear."

Revere a landscape
of all and any kind
because it’s better
than this.


Over all this piece is great. Rough start but that might jsut be me. Props mate!

My piece;
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1433706