#1
I have been told a story here, and I can not get my mind from it, because, basically... It makes the same sense as 5 year old retard kid. Nevertheless,

So it starts as any old-baltic countries folklore starts.
There have been a Grandma and a Grandpa. The story revolves around Grandpa.
Grandpa was a fisherman, quite a professional fisherman. And it was cold, it was winter.
Ignoring the weather outside, Grandpa stepped outside to do what he always does, fish.
Arriving at lake, getting on ice, he tries to make a hole inside it. Bad weather and shitty
luck stroke Grandpa with thunder. Melting the ice below him and analogous paralyzing him,made him fall deep deep into the depths of the lake. As the lights from his eyes started flickering, a mermaid approaches him. And telling him in the language the Grandpa speaks '' Come with me, I will save you'' after those words, she touches his head, and momentously he starts breathing underwater. Following the mermaid, the pair arrives at a rare kind of underwater cave, that is not covered in water and filled with air. As Grandpa climbs into the cave, the mermaid talks '' I will go find something to eat. Do Not start a fire, there is not much air here to begin with.'' Saying those words, mermaid vanishes into water.
Was it because he was freezing or just he was indifferent to what mythical creatures have
to say, Grandpa did the opposite. As the flicker turned into flame, and flame into fire,
lightness filled the dark cave, presenting Grandpa a generous number of skeletons. The
rapid rush of blood into his head made him orientate himself into the situation. And as the
mermaid surfaces out of water, he blows a critical hit into her head with a skull he found
lying around.
Due to the fact that the lake was frozen, until the winter will end he had no chance of
returning back to village. Therefore he did what any person would do in his situation,
he made a steak out of mermaid and was feeding himself with anything he could find,
until winter passed.
After reappearing at the village, after answering the villagers question where he was , and
after hearing everyones disbelief about what happened, he persuade his daughter to come
with him into the cave and witness the mermaids skelet. The daughter does just that, and
as they arrive at the cave, and as she sees the skelet, and after she says she now believes
him, they follow their way back to village to tell everybody. But before the daughter
plunges into the water, she takes the ring which was wearing the mermaid and tries it on.
After what she transforms into a mermaid and suffocate her father and brings him back
into the cave to devour him.

Thats the end.
#2
Redundant title is redundant.
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#3
Yeah... Umm... Cool story bro.

Ok, so the story makes no sense, but it was a good story I guess. What it basically means is not to go fishing while there's a thunderstorm in freezing weather and not eating mermaids.
Last edited by BlacksailsTippa at Apr 24, 2011,
#4
Quote by BlacksailsTippa
Yeah... Umm... Cool story bro.

Ok, so the story makes no sense, but it was a good story I guess. What it basically means is not to go fishing while there's a thunderstorm in freezing weather and not eating mermaids.



2 minutes of my life I will never get back.
#5
Quote by K Reyn
2 minutes of my life I will never get back.


For a lesson I already knew.
I'm so happy. I get to eat a muffin.
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You are so happy to eat a muffin it's kinda scary.
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#8
I think there can be three variation on the morality of the story.

1) Do not kill the mermaid that saved your life, even if she wants to eat you. Because karma is a bitch.

2) Grandpa- The Government. Thunder- Financial Crisis. Depth of the Lake- Deep shit into which the Government fell. Mermaid- is Russian Oligarchs from London, that want to help. Batcave - agreement of withdrawing sums of money from offshore to Government. Skeletons- The doubts of government and their uncertainty as to the trustworthiness of Russian Oligarchs. Murder of Mermaid- breach of the contract. Daughter- President, which was initially good, and then read the agreement, became sad and tried the ring on ( corruption), and became bad. The morale- Start thinking when you go voting.

3) Dont Pick up hookers and bury them in shallow caves.
Last edited by Arel at Apr 24, 2011,
#11
Quote by BlacksailsTippa
I didn't even know thunder strikes during winter, I have never witnessed this


And canibalistic mermaid is an average thing in your line of work?
#12
Quote by Arel
And canibalistic mermaid is an average thing in your line of work?

Yes, yes they are. Except they all have space suits on, and they fly around ON UNICORNS WITH LASERS!


#13
amazing.
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#14
Quote by BlacksailsTippa
Yes, yes they are. Except they all have space suits on, and they fly around ON UNICORNS WITH LASERS!




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#15
Here is another story I want to share, the story follows the adventure of my friend Andrew. I will be saying from the start that the story is real.

Andrew has good married neighbors: Mary and Vanea. To whom he got acquainted one year ago.

Vanea and Mary got married 6 years ago. Mary - Is a gorgeous thing, and in addition is working as an engineer with a relative high salary.
Vanea- Is a CEO, in a company involved with transportation of heavy object, and earns even more.
From an outside perspective, everything is perfect in this situation, and in most parts it is. But Vanea and Marry has an irritating hitch . They can not have children. Marry has some kind of disease and Vanea because of it started drinking, which made the situation even worse. Even Marrys' parents were getting vexed, to a point where they said, that Vanea does not screw their daughter good enough.

Andrews' relation with Marry and Vanea are friendly and even gregarious. They occasionally take their dogs out, and Andrew constantly helps them with their computer problem.

So, one day Vanea went to Ukraine on a business trip. And afterwards things went as in a ridiculous joke:

Marry called Andrew to fix occasional computer problem. Marry got in a sexual intercourse with Andrew ( with no protection[ with her disease ,where is the need?]) . Marry got pregnant.

When Vanea gets to know that he will become a father, he stops drinking, starts earning more money and virtually begins to shit with rainbows and butterflies. That is how happy he is.

As for our protagonist, he will become the Godfather of the child. Which leaves a stain on his conscious. On the one hand, he made a person happy, on the other hand the act was far from honorable.
#16
Sounds like it's straight out of some drama movie. Except it's only almost near the end. Because... other guy still needs to find out about all this. Or not, it's a cliffhanger. It's in the sequel.
#17
.......tell another one TS.

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#18
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.......tell another one TS.


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#20
Okay story, bad English.
E-married to ilikepirates

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#22
This one lacks the mysterious element:

Whenever anyone asked him about Zen, the great master Gutei would
quietly raise one finger into the air. A boy in the village began to imitate this
behavior. Whenever he heard people talking about Gutei's teachings, he
would interrupt the discussion and raise his finger. Gutei heard about the
boy's mischief. When he saw him in the street, he seized him and cut off his
finger. The boy cried and began to run off, but Gutei called out to him. When
the boy turned to look, Gutei raised his finger into the air. At that moment
the boy became enlightened.
#23
I believe that, In the end the boy realized Gutei uses his index finger, not his middle finger. Gutei took exception to the boy using his middle finger.
#25
Quote by Arel
I believe that, In the end the boy realized Gutei uses his index finger, not his middle finger. Gutei took exception to the boy using his middle finger.

I lol'd.

In what way did the opening story not make sense? It just...isn't believable. That's all.