Poll: Can zombies get erections?
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View poll results: Can zombies get erections?
Yes
23 20%
No
92 80%
Voters: 115.
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#1
Simple question.

I have been in this debate for 3 days now. It started with my roommate but has now spread to my friends and coworkers.

I am saying no, as simply there is no blood flow or pulse to provide that bodily function, and zombies have one purpose, to feed.

The opposing argument so far that sex is a primal instinct, and zombies should still have basic instincts. Also, that since they have no blood flow, they shouldnt even be able to move, and whatever allows them to move, should allow them to get erections.


Thoughts?

edit: talking about old school out of the ground zombies, not the "infected"
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Last edited by DempseyPunk at Apr 27, 2011,
#2
I'd have to say no. They need to feed, to ease the pain.

However, in Braindead, zombies have children.
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#3
They have no blood flow or immune systems. they shouldn't move really.
You belong in a museum.

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#4
You have too much time on your hands. Obviously though, there are several different types of zombies and each different type would have different penile capabilities.
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#5
if the rest of their muscles can move, then yes

now if they can also have sperm and eggs, we have the problem of zombies breeding
"The man that hath no music in himself, nor is not moved with concord of sweet sounds, is fit for treasons, stratagems, and spoils. The motions of his spirit are dull as night, and his affections dark as Erebus. Let no such man be trusted."
#6
Let's hope not - zombie gang-rape is a factor no-one's accounted for in their zombie apoclypse plans.
Quote by ChadLikesGuitar
even now, an 8 year old could go download gorilla rape porn and jack off to it.
#9
They eat to feed the virus that drives them.

The virus doesn't want to ****.
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#11
Quote by 23dannybhoy23
Let's hope not - zombie gang-rape is a factor no-one's accounted for in their zombie apoclypse plans.


+1, well said
Quote by cagnius
I'd rather be spooning than doing my essay...
#14
Quote by WhiskeyFace
No. Zombies only have one desire: eat people.

I was always confused by this. They are supposedly driven only by primal instincts, and yet they are picky eaters. They will eat humans, but not one another. Also, after a human is bitten, they become a zombie. What the balls?
#16
I'm not going to actually answer the question, but seeing how zombie bites are how they spread, it would be pointless for them to have sex until every person on Earth was a zombie. Then and only then would there actually be a need for it.

Also, considering that zombies don't think cognitively, I can't say for sure that they would breed even if they could.

You, good sir, have not gone over to your friends house after a hard night of drinking to find 2 dudes passed out in the same room both holding their own flaccid cocks in hand, passed out, with porn on the tv.
#19
No, just because that would make them less scary. Just imagine a zombie walking slowly towards you going "Uuurrrghhhhhhhh-aaaaahhhhhh" while having an erection.
#20
Quote by captainsnazz
I can add this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_erection
Also, Death Erection would be an awesome band name.


Let's start a death metal band, bro. We'll tour with Dying Fetus and everything.

And I have no idea.

Although vampires can't, because they don't have any blood running through their veins according to Stephanie Meyer.

Fantasize that, you floppy-dick loving hopeless 13 year old girls.
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#21
Quote by sashki
I was always confused by this. They are supposedly driven only by primal instincts, and yet they are picky eaters. They will eat humans, but not one another. Also, after a human is bitten, they become a zombie. What the balls?

Duh because zombies aren't fresh!

There's the classic zombie (undead) or the modern zombie (virus).

Classic zombie = Eat the living
Modern zombie = Spread virus
#23
Quote by OldRocker
Zombies ain't real so does it matter?

OP has a Zombie rape fetish
#24
Quote by darkcheef
OP has a Zombie rape fetish

Is that so wrong?
>>-(ಠ_ಠ-<<
>>-(. Y .)-<<
>>> . (<<<
>>-( Y )-<<
Quote by dudetheman
Dude, your fucking sig creeps me out.

Quote by Kosh H
I just noticed his sig too...I feel uncomfortable now...

Quote by WantsLesPaul
Your sig killed my boner _


DIY SO-CAL PUNK LABEL
#26
No heartbeat = no blood pumping = no erection.

This was a stupid question.
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#27
Quote by OldRocker
Zombies ain't real so does it matter?

Zombie boners is srs bsns.
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#29
Quote by laid-to-waste
Let's start a death metal band, bro. We'll tour with Dying Fetus and everything.

And I have no idea.

Although vampires can't, because they don't have any blood running through their veins according to Stephanie Meyer.

Fantasize that, you floppy-dick loving hopeless 13 year old girls.

Are you aware of the twilight dildo? It's a dildo you can freeze.
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Wah pedal.

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That's got to be my all time favourite online death threat

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My chest hurts after that.
#30
Quote by strat0blaster
No heartbeat = no blood pumping = no erection.

This was a stupid question.


You could say the same thing about them being, uh lulz idk, functioning?


Quote by LastSlayerKing
Are you aware of the twilight dildo? It's a dildo you can freeze.

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#31
Quote by laid-to-waste
You could say the same thing about them being, uh lulz idk, functioning?



...it exists. Srsly. Google it
I'm selling an ernie ball wah pedal. Buy my ernie ball wah pedal.
...
Wah pedal.

Quote by 23dannybhoy23
That's got to be my all time favourite online death threat

Quote by smokeysteve22


My chest hurts after that.
#33
No they can't, they're dead dammit!
Some people just wanna watch the world burn. Wanna join me when I take my turn to pour the gas, light the match, see your world flip upside down and drop until it's inside out?
#34
Quote by LastSlayerKing
...it exists. Srsly. Google it


i have googled a lot of shit, man.

but this is a nono.
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#35
I think they could, like i bet the zombies from shaun of the dead could...

But id rather if they didn't, what if you woke up in a zombie Apocalypse and heard "garraaarwwawwrr i want to f&ck your brraaaiiiiinnnnsssss"
#36
Zombies pass their genetic code through their mouths, which means that their teeth are their boners.
.
#37
Quote by laid-to-waste
i have googled a lot of shit, man.

but this is a nono.

Dude, I could trick you into Googling some bad shit. This is an article :p
I'm selling an ernie ball wah pedal. Buy my ernie ball wah pedal.
...
Wah pedal.

Quote by 23dannybhoy23
That's got to be my all time favourite online death threat

Quote by smokeysteve22


My chest hurts after that.
#38
Quote by LastSlayerKing
Dude, I could trick you into Googling some bad shit. This is an article :p


Agreed.

Which is why I'm not googling your pseudo-porn.
Click here to hear my BOB DYLAN (Blowing in the Wind) out right now May 2k17
#39
Quote by Fat Lard
Zombies pass their genetic code through their mouths, which means that their teeth are their boners.

/thread.
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#40
Quote by laid-to-waste
Agreed.

Which is why I'm not googling your pseudo-porn.

Meh, your loss. Pretty sure I saw it on cracked...
I'm selling an ernie ball wah pedal. Buy my ernie ball wah pedal.
...
Wah pedal.

Quote by 23dannybhoy23
That's got to be my all time favourite online death threat

Quote by smokeysteve22


My chest hurts after that.
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