#1
A Poem inspired by a friend who's going through a tough time, a similar tough time to one I think we've all had so it conjured up some memories. I quote Steve Coleman in this piece, I am not trying to pass his work off as my own.

A Poem About Hannah

I can't sleep anymore.
Not that I can't fall asleep,
but each time I do she invades my dreams,
keeps me awake in fantasies till my eyes are red.
Eyes are spent.
Can't open eyes but to see her,
faintly,
for a second.

Laying in my bed I imagine her next to me.
Her arm over my shoulder, her
breath on my neck. It feels so real
I turn to kiss her but;
eyes don't meet.
Eyes don't sleep how they used to anymore.

Her eyes may be blue forever but
Perhaps being blue isn't such a bad thing.
Blue is the colour of the sky, and so
it is the colour of the sea. You see,
Blue is the colour of reflection.

And as much as I wish it would
my reflection never grows a partner,
no matter how much it deserves one.
She never stems from my chest where I planted her.
Legs like winding roots won't ever ground themselves next to me,
Leaves like fingers never run through my hair.

Green is the true colour of love.

And so I stare at blue reflection.
My body, now just eyes becomes a pupil.
These green arms hold up my green heart
and I learn what love feels like.

As I stretch in dim sunlight
She holds my chest in one hand and
lays her head above it.
Resting again I see that she,
and the seed that rooted her in me,
have escaped into the ground.
#2
This is a very beautiful love song. Great imagery, great imagination, and you set the mood very well.

But there is one thing that I think you may have looked over:
"Legs like winding roots won't ever ground themselves next to me,
Leaves like fingers never run through my hair."

You seem to reverse the simile on that second line. Shouldn't it be "Fingers like leaves"?
#3
That was semi-intentional. I just typed it out wrong when I was writing it at first but, I just preferred it that way round when I corrected it.

It still kind of makes sense in that, leaves, like fingers, never actually do run through my hair. But I can see how that may throw people off the image. I just personally liked the image of leaves moving through hair in the same way fingers do.