#1
Hey everyone, I just wrote this and wanted to see what people think. I wrote it and arranged it in about an hour so I'm not really sure what to make of it, I'm not much of a lyricist, just trying to write more/improve and such. It came out in a simple rhyming pattern, but once it started to take shape I wanted it to a bit childlike if that makes sense.

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Letter’s to Myself

Letters to myself
These words upon a page
Writing from so long ago
I wish I could have changed

Letters to myself
A life I surely lost
These feelings have been buried
Collected in the dust

Letters to myself
Another sleepless week
As the white fades into black
I force myself to speak

Letters to myself
My crooked voice begins
“You should have died long ago,
A price for all your sins”

Letters to myself
Gathering steam again
Everything I’d known
Was shattered by that dream

Letters to myself
Parading on a stage
Dancing around in front of me
Filling me with rage

Letters to myself
If only I had known
I see a piece is missing
For my heart is made of stone

Letters to myself
I have become a living shell
A man encased in crystal
A cold and lifeless hell

Letters to myself
Flooding me with guilt
Making me tear down
Everything I have built

Letters to myself
Tears fill my eyes
All the days of crying
Have left me almost blind

Letters to myself
My very last request
Flowers on my gravestone
Upon my place of death

Letters to myself
Staring up at me
As the blood escapes my body
They slowly drift away

Letters to myself
I can barely see
The night has taken over
And I have been set free

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Spiraling Up Through the Crack in the Sky...

...Leaving Material World Behind...


SOUNDCLOUD

GT - Elite Curbstomp
#2
i believe having some sort of refrain would be beneficial to have. its good. but a refrain would keep it from being somewhat of a run-on song.
Quote by Pillo114
In all seriousness though, man up. What do you want us to do? Sue them for hurting your heavy feelings?
#4
The lyrics are really nice, well done.Maybe a melody of a sad ballad would go well with them.It does seem a bit hard to make a song to these lyrics, but give it a try.Or have you already done that? xD
#5
Haha, its more of a poem, at first I wanted it to be a song, but I realised with all the repeats and stuff it probably wouldn't work
Spiraling Up Through the Crack in the Sky...

...Leaving Material World Behind...


SOUNDCLOUD

GT - Elite Curbstomp
#6
poem or no-poem i actually like it alot. i like how it is childlike
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I write poetry
And it sucks.