Too much distortion!!!! And... you're playing the actual song so loud that I can't really tell what you're doing... besides the fact that all I hear is distortion. I don't know if you doubled over your guitar in some places, or if you just don't line up in some places, confuses me a bit.
I used Amplitube 3 to record it, maybe it sounds so loud because i was making this with non monitors.
" Living the world as the music makes me feel "