#1
Through whatever means, either you've won the lottery or you've successfully killed a pirate captain and mated with his woman/cabin boy it doesn't matter you are now the alpha male/female/Dutchie on board said ship.

First things first, what do you change the ships name to?

Second things second, what do you do next? Purge the crew of any mutinous elements by making them walk the plank like the scurvy dogs they are? Pillage and plunder every port between here and Tortuga? Attempt to get other sea dogs under your command and form a mighty fleet?

Come on you bunch of land loving, yellow bellied gits what would you do with your newly aquired vessel?

and the first person who say's 'Your momma' is going to get keelhauled...in Antarctica...naked.
#2

I thought this was literal. Fuck you and your silly games.
dirtbag ballet by the bins down the alley
as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#3
Ship Name: Jenny

The crew is all female.

First thing is hot lesbian sex.



I'm a girl too.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


Quote by CrossBack7
Momie's like not even a real person, just an asian, lesbian spirit.
#5
I just watch Pirates of the Caribiean 4!


It's pretty entertaining!


Also, If I was a crew member on a pirate ship, I'd be the calm, senseable one who thinks we shouldn't head to the creepy cove with a scary, scary name like Dead Mans Cove, Skinless Pirate Cove or even... Horrific Castration Cove...

I'd also call the ship An Erection, so if my enemy, the damn British, spot my ship they'll be saying "Cap'n, theres An Erection on the horizon!!"

Worst thing to ever say on a ship full of lonely men...
Last edited by Moggan13 at May 18, 2011,
#8
Ship would be The Abyss.

All vessels sailing the seven seas would know and fear the name, and all other ships flying the Pit's flag would sail comfortably knowing they had her as an ally.
#9
Quote by Momentosis
Ship Name: Jenny

The crew is all female.

First thing is hot lesbian sex.



I'm a girl too.


Just because you want to dress up and act as one does not make you a girl.
#11
SS Anne.

Then I'll just chill in the harbour and have all the sex with all the pirate bitches.

Yes I'm aware of the contradiction.
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#12
Quote by TheBurningFish
SS Anne.

Then I'll just chill in the harbour and have all the sex with all the pirate bitches.

Yes I'm aware of the contradiction.


Teach me CUT!
#13
Quote by Momentosis
Ship Name: Jenny

The crew is all female.

First thing is hot lesbian sex.



I'm a girl too.



LIAR! YOUR MORE SAUSAGE THAT STUTGARD! I'VE SEEN YOUR PROFILE!
#14
Quote by blake1221
Teach me CUT!

I'll require a back rub
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#15
I sell the ship and buy a jazzmaster, mustang, Japanese jagmaster and a Fender Twin Reverb.
#20
Quote by fuzzpedal
I sell the ship and buy a jazzmaster, mustang, Japanese jagmaster and a Fender Twin Reverb.


With a pirate ship you could always plunder said guitar equipment, that's not to mention the ethical problems of putting 50-100 people out of work. Do you want that on your conscience?
#21
Quote by geanes

First thing I do is pillage New Jersey.



Guidos beat you to it bro.

OT: I'd name her Kate Middleton and siege London, just for the symbolic irony.
Quote by SonOfPest
Its the Lydian mode; formed in Eastern Arabia when the Persians invaded England.


Quote by Blind In 1 Ear
try the sexolydian scale.
#23
Quote by sakura'sdarkest
With a pirate ship you could always plunder said guitar equipment, that's not to mention the ethical problems of putting 50-100 people out of work. Do you want that on your conscience?

I will use the rest of the money to open a music store and employ the pirates, also, aren't there more ethical problems with stealing all that stuff than there are with putting a few people out of a job.
Last edited by fuzzpedal at May 18, 2011,
#24
I'd call my boat the SS Stutter, and we'd strike fear into the hearts of our enemies... Partially the first time, but completely the second go.
Do you feel warm within your cage?

And have you figured out yet -


Life goes by?
Quote by Hydra150
There's a dick on Earth, too
It's you
#27
I actually live on a boat unlike you landlubbers, so this would be sorta redundant for me...

Go to my profile AND TAKE A GOOD HARD LOOK AT THE MOTHERFUCKING BOAT!
I forgot how to play guitar. Q_Q
#28
Quote by BringMeTheDerp
I actually live on a boat unlike you landlubbers, so this would be sorta redundant for me...

Go to my profile AND TAKE A GOOD HARD LOOK AT THE MOTHERFUCKING BOAT!

But there isn't a boat in my garage.

I don't even have a garage.

This isn't right at all...

Hey, guitar website, live on a boat... Are you the dude who does the Bowie songs in The Life Aquatic?
The UG Awards exist only to instill me with existential doubt.


For me, the 60's ended that day in 1978...

Willies. Fuck the lick and fuck you too.
#29
Quote by fuzzpedal
I will use the rest of the money to open a music store and employ the pirates, also, aren't there more ethical problems with stealing all that stuff than there are with putting a few people out of a job.


Ah, but the people who you steal from will most likely have insurance so if you think about it stealing is a victimless crime in this case...just as long as you don't do anything stupid and get someone killed.
#30
Quote by TheBurningFish
But there isn't a boat in my garage.

I don't even have a garage.

This isn't right at all...

Hey, guitar website, live on a boat... Are you the dude who does the Bowie songs in The Life Aquatic?





No, actually...

The only sort of 'gig' i've ever done is play margaritaville for a bunch of drunk retirees...
I forgot how to play guitar. Q_Q
#31
Quote by sakura'sdarkest
Ah, but the people who you steal from will most likely have insurance so if you think about it stealing is a victimless crime in this case...just as long as you don't do anything stupid and get someone killed.

Well... when you put it that way, I'll set sail for Japan tomorrow and my ship will be named the SS Offset.
#33
Name: Serenity

I'd take my crew around the world, taking any job we can find.
#34
Call up Ishmael and Ahab. Get that ****in white whale once n for all!
Quote by ErikLensherr
Don't belittle it like that, your mom produces top quality stuff.



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