#1
hey kiddos dis sum spoke word will record soon. also, listen to my new EP: http://atlantistheluchador.bandcamp.com/ free download. download it to do me a favor haha


lesbians
ex took the wind out of your sails when she said she was a lesbian lets just be friends lets just sing about the thrill again killed again on long island for the zodiac reincarnation wonder how the hookers will live in the next life wonder how you're going to treat your future wife tonight its three days til your wedding day seven months sack of joy to pave the way to a god forsaken future of late bills nba playoffs meaning more than your own family score measles of sympathy from the women in your daily double dose of pornography (but its the only thing that keeps me going) ex put your railway cart in the wrong tracks its what you gotta tell yourself when the anxiety attacks your heart wall is thinning like your hair line but in the queen bed your only kinship kingship of solace is a quantum of wholeness is a rapping on the frosted window she turns the glass door handle in your dreams the second story house quiet is deafening without the burglars of your youth ex ex oh ghetto gospel brought you from the brink now you're turning hat tricks to stop the subtle wink to the devil all around you like smog from your home city that used to be a valley before mr. monsantopoly raped that country girl into a bourgeois lady ex you find out relationship status on facebook wanna tie every woman that you see to a semi's hitch hook energy spent keep your roided muscles light in mic check one two is this thing on teargas mode park your car at the strip club and go spot go cry until you got no more im telling you poet man (its the only thing that keeps me going)
Last edited by #1 synth at May 27, 2011,
#3
runs a little long- but the ending is necessary. excellent flow without breaking too heavily in any spot.
#4
..solace is a quantum..

didn't like the james bond reference here..
..mr. monsantopoly raped..

nobody likes monsanto, but I didn't like this in this piece either

aside from those two, perhaps the 'its the only thing that keeps me going' could be repeated more than twice.. it seems to be a theme throughout, but it's only said twice.. not sure about that though.

But aside from those 3, I liked this, especially the flow,.. you could say that this should be in single lines, instead of one block of text, but I don't really mind either way.. I was thinking that this could be recorded, spoken, over a backbeat of some sort
#5
one hundred percent amazing.
agreed on the monstanto relation, but personifying it as mr. monsantopoly against the country girl
really brilliant synth
i am going to read everything you've done in the past year
super impressed. and looking forward to recordings. recordings are sweet.
#6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-Mw4UdoG-w

if yall are interested (specially those interested in spoken word or rap). got rough at the end but didnt want to rerecord. leave comments, show your friends, etc.

will be uploading more similar spoken word/rap on this channel over the next week or so that ive written over the last year so stay tuned if you want to.
love, Dylan.