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#1
What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.


examples:

Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he was hit by a bus.


a atheist and a christian walk into a bar,
they are good friends and enjoy their conversations.


A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.


A man walks into a bar, he is an alcoholic and is ruining his family.


Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle?
Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human.


How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.


How many jews does it take to change a light bulb?

Two, one to change it and the other to hold the ladder so the first man won't fall and hurt himself.
Last edited by aCatinAuschwitz at Jun 4, 2011,
#4
So, this Irish guy walks past a bar.

There was a bigger bar around the corner.
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oh my god! guitarViking is a genius... respect !!!

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#5
Why are my threads so awesome?

Because I am awesome.
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He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


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#8
Q: How many Jew does it take to change a light bulb?

A: A lightbulb cannot be changed, it either is or isn't. Do you mean replace a burned-out bulb with a new one? With design, logistics, manufacturing, marketing of just that single bulb- there are many people involved. It could be argued that we all play some small part in the process.
#9
why can't hellen keller drive?

because she's dead.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

the holocaust.
Sent from my iPad.
#10
Okay, now a serious anti-joke (if such a thing exists):


A GERMAN, a JEW and a BLACK GUY walk into a forest.
They come to a magic tree that can talk.
The tree says: "Each one of you has three wishes."
So all three say: "Shut up, trees can't talk!"
#12
or Why did the girls who stripped an 11 year old boy not go to jail?

because...the American government is racist, stupid, bigots, racist on the low key, hate immigrants, are rich and hate poor people, try to control what you think, try to make you think you have a choice, know that the electoral college is money bag, use fillibusters to stop people from proving bad points, get appointed in california although they are washed up movie stars and nasty fat girls baby daddys with no political knowledge. dont fund stem cell research bc it is unholy although they all cheat and their wives and have sex tapes.

should i keep going?

Third eye....out.

Get it??? thats funny right?

BTW im a natural US citizen and like my hometown.
Last edited by treysonpwaters at Jun 4, 2011,
#13
What's 12 inches long and hangs in front of your ass?

Bill Clinton's tie.
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Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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I also have to do that. Cottaging this weekend
#14
Quote by treysonpwaters
or Why did the girls who stripped an 11 year old boy not go to jail?

because...the American government is racist, stupid, bigots, racist on the low key, hate immigrants, are rich and hate poor people, try to control what you think, try to make you think you have a choice, know that the electoral college is money bag, use fillibusters to stop people from proving bad points, get appointed in california although they are washed up movie stars and nasty fat girls baby daddys with no political knowledge. dont fund stem cell research bc it is unholy although they all cheat and their wives and have sex tapes.

should i keep going?

Third eye....out.

Get it??? thats funny right?

BTW im a natural US citizen and like my hometown.



close, the us government has been highjacked by offshore banks and almost every politician is on a power trip. and stage events and cover them up to complete there agenda and hoping you go along with it and watch oprah and american idol.
Last edited by aCatinAuschwitz at Jun 4, 2011,
#15
Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.
#16
why didn't i laugh?

because there was no punchline
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#17
Quote by aCatinAuschwitz
close, the us government has been highjacked by offshore banks and almost every politician is on a power trip. and stage events and cover them up to complete there agenda and hoping you go along with it and watch oprah and american idol.


hey man, that was my joke lol....

the pit (UG) doesn't have enough bandwidth for this to keep going..
#18
If I don't find it these funny, is it because it truly was an anti-joke?
But if a anti-joke is supposed to be funny...

DO ANTI-JOKES TRULY EXIST?


DO I EXIST?
A penny for my thoughts?

A bargain I say!

I'll give you a dollar

Take them all away...
#19
The best one I think I seen on here ...

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile?

Robin, get in the Batmobile
Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.

- Berthold Auerbach


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Wow, being surrounded by all of these humourless, pussy-whipped virgins is starting to make me sick.

Check out my band!
#20
Quote by borntorock2112
If I don't find it these funny, is it because it truly was an anti-joke?
But if a anti-joke is supposed to be funny...

DO ANTI-JOKES TRULY EXIST?



DO I EXIST?


I hope not or I will die of irony poisoning.
#21
Why does the 5-year old have a Gibson Custom guitar?

He is spoiled.
HILT!

Where's Waldo?

#22
Why can't stevie wonder read?

Because he is black duh...

Well if he can't read why is he always smiling?

ummmm

he doesn't know he is black..


lol...im black btw so shove off...

again folks..i am african amercian...don't start a race war...just a joke i heard and thought was funny...I can laugh at funny stuff no matter the content...after all comedy is the true uniter. watch some comedy break stereo types over the ages....happens all the time. just havin fun.
Last edited by treysonpwaters at Jun 4, 2011,
#23
Quote by treysonpwaters
Why can't stevie wonder read?

Because he is black duh...

Well if he can't read why is he always smiling?

ummmm

he doesn't know he is black..


lol...im black btw so shove off...

Why are black people the only people who are allowed to make black guy jokes?

Because they are racist
HILT!

Where's Waldo?

#24
Quote by OliOsbourne
Why are black people the only people who are allowed to make black guy jokes?

Because they are racist


what do you call a monkey in a tree....

top branch executive...idk a homeless guy told me that..gota love the strip....

on another note do they have strips in the uk?
#25
So they're so not funny they're funny? Is this along the same lines of forcing something that's the most unrelated thing you can think of and calling it random, though the process of thinking of it shows it's not random at all?

[IN PHIL WE TRUST]


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#26
Quote by SteveHouse
So they're so not funny they're funny? Is this along the same lines of forcing something that's the most unrelated thing you can think of and calling it random, though the process of thinking of it shows it's not random at all?



yes and no....

more like telling a joke with an obvious answer and coming back with a not so obvious punch line....we r getting a little off track..

like..

why is this the best thread in the pit?

bc, it is soooo funny...get it.

have some fun you are over analyzing it.
ie: i am bored and have nothing to do right now.
Last edited by treysonpwaters at Jun 4, 2011,
#27
Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.
#29
Quote by aCatinAuschwitz
Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.


botched.. i hope...otherwise...explain. I see where you are going and it has potential..but...

YOU SUCK! lol.
#30
did you seriously just register to post this thread? also, *insert searchbar joke here*

so a duck walks into a bar. upon seeing the duck, the barkeeper calls animal control and they come and remove the duck from the bar. they then relocate the duck to a pond in a local park and they all live happily ever after.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#31
Quote by aCatinAuschwitz
How do you stop a black person from drowning?

You toss him a flotation device.



and the correct repsonse is........drummmm roooolllll
take your foot of his head...

how it it I have better racist jokes?

my friends suck lol...
#34
so a black guy (me) walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder...

and the bartender says "HEY may where did you get that thing????"

and the PARROT goes...Africa! they are everywhere!
#36
John got shot... He died
HILT!

Where's Waldo?

#37
You guys, you guys, I figured it out.

Anti-jokes are just jokes that're humourly handicapped, which is why you shouldn't laugh at them. Shame on you.
A penny for my thoughts?

A bargain I say!

I'll give you a dollar

Take them all away...
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