#1
I made this awhile ago but haven't really showed it to anybody for crits yet, so I figured I would take it here and see what people think. It a faster, rushed sounding song and I like it, but we'll see what some of you may think.

A forewarning: The drums may sound a tad repetitive (hi-hat abuse) and weird sometimes because I was trying to experiment with more linear style patterns. The drums as a whole need a bit of simplifying as well but I like how they sound right now anyways.

EDIT: I've made some small adjustments to the song. Most of it is just for me, like fingering adjustments to make things easier for me to play, but I changed the 'chorus' to make some of those wacky notes sound better and cleaner in general.
Attachments:
19-2.zip
Last edited by Dregen at Jun 6, 2011,
#2
I found it to be a bit astounding. The drumming can be overwhelming, but that's part of the charm.
The chord voicings and leads are what really caught my attention. The song is incredibly catchy for it's frantic nature. You've done quite well with what could've easily amounted a incoherent, nonsensical mess.

I don't really think this needs much of a reworking. Maybe a more dramatic/defined exit, but with vocals, I think it could work as is.
A great song, I must say.
#4
Quote by huevos
I found it to be a bit astounding. The drumming can be overwhelming, but that's part of the charm.
The chord voicings and leads are what really caught my attention. The song is incredibly catchy for it's frantic nature. You've done quite well with what could've easily amounted a incoherent, nonsensical mess.

I don't really think this needs much of a reworking. Maybe a more dramatic/defined exit, but with vocals, I think it could work as is.
A great song, I must say.


Catchy wasn't really one of my intentions when I made this, but I'm not complaining, haha. I find that a bit surprising to hear. My intention with this song was primarily to experiment and destroy certain patterns that occur with my writing. And to express emotion, obviously haha. I like controlled chaos and I think this song is probably a good example of it. And yeah, the ending is pretty shite. I don't know what I'm going to do about it yet.

I have to say thanks for your input. It's made me feel a bit more confident with my writing now. I remember I couple other times I posted songs here like a year and a half ago and to say that the reception wasn't very good is an understatement. I was a pretty terrible writer. To have someone who I see do good album reviews regularly on UG give some positive feedback for my song makes me feel all tingly on the inside haha.

Quote by STONESHAKER
Dude I thought it was sick.


Thanks. I'm glad you liked it.

Also, I've made some small adjustments to the song. Most of it is just for me, like fingering adjustments to make things easier for me to play, but I changed the 'chorus' to make some of those wacky notes sound better and cleaner in general.
Last edited by Dregen at Jun 6, 2011,
#5
Thanks for your crit. C4C'ing now.

Overall it's a really strong piece, some great guitar work and the structure is more or less OK. I really liked the 'urgency' created at the beginning and how that feeling sort of evolves throughout the piece. As huevos said, it's really catchy despite how frantic it is which is awesome.

I loved the drums in the 'verse' part (72 - 136) the drumming for the rest of the song is a little over the top, of course that could be due to the midi sounds, perhaps a recorded version with more mixing or reverb or something would change that, but anyway. I also thought the 'extra' guitar in 105 - 121 was a little unnecessary, I'd be playing something more subtle tbh, just so as to counteract the other guitar, contrast is good.

The only problem with the verse part is that I don't think the buildup fully worked, and it felt like it was going to lead into a new 'theme' (if you will) rather than just another chorus, something more epic should go there, like a solo or something.

As for the outro, I actually quite liked the outro riff, I just don't think it really worked as an outro, I'd try and fit it in somewhere else.

So yeah, work on the outro, simplify the drums as you said and I work a bit on the second chorus and the buildup into it.

Overall, it's a really solid song, should turn out great.

edit: Oh and thanks again for the crit on my song.
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#6
I thought the drums detracted from the song far to much, to the point where I'd actually say it ruined the song. I also think in general the tempo was too high. The clean bridge section was really nice.
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