#3
Lol.
Quote by Ville Valo
Hurting Linde is like hurting Bambi. You just can't do it.





You should click on those, I think.



I like My Little Pony. Come at me, bro.
#5
Quote by 'Leviathan'


First thing that came to my mind. Even if the thing isn't a weasel.



Seriously though
STಠ_ಠ
#7
It took me by surprise when they said he punched the man in the nose.

I thought he'd be all, "Go boy!" Then the weasel marten would jump down from his back and scratch the shit out of the victim.

I can't say I'm not disappointed.
#8
My friend was mugged by a guy with a cobra once.
Quote by Athabasca
My ex did the same. Cheated on me and then acted like I'd given her sister a facial. Women are retarded.
#10
'According to police, the male victim asked the alleged assailant "Why are you carrying a weasel?". The man replied, "It's not a weasel, it's a marten," before allegedly punching him in the nose.'

I don't know why that's so funny.
#11
Quote by AnAngrySquirrel
'According to police, the male victim asked the alleged assailant "Why are you carrying a weasel?". The man replied, "It's not a weasel, it's a marten," before allegedly punching him in the nose.'

I don't know why that's so funny.



I laughed uncontrollably when I read that.

Also. What the hell? Of course this guy would be from Washington.

We are a state famous for two things: grunge, and bestiality.
#12
Quote by superunknown
I laughed uncontrollably when I read that.

Also. What the hell? Of course this guy would be from Washington.

We are a state famous for two things: grunge, and bestiality.

I think we can conclude that the woman he was arguing with was...

His wife.
#13
Quote by triface
I think we can conclude that the woman he was arguing with was...

His wife.


they never did say how the marten died...


#14
I imagine the intruder had a hard time trying to weasel out of that one...
I'M IN THE FIGHT TO CURE CYSTIC FIBROSIS...MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!


Quote by JustRooster
I'm a straight man, but I'd put that surfcaster right in my mouth.



Quote by JD2k9
Well, life is like a penis.
Women make it hard.
Also, it's short but seems long when it gets hard.
#16
I'm thinking it was his pet martin, and either his girlfriend or her ex had killed it and he went looking for revenge by breaking into his girlfriend's ex's house, possibly he was going to leave it's body in his bed or something.

Or maybe his girlfriend was having an affair with her ex, it was her pet martin and he was planning on leaving it in her ex's bed for her to find.

Or maybe it was just some piece of roadkill that he'd found and was going to leave in his girlfriend's ex's bed because he just doesn't like him.
#18
Quote by AnAngrySquirrel
'According to police, the male victim asked the alleged assailant "Why are you carrying a weasel?". The man replied, "It's not a weasel, it's a marten," before allegedly punching him in the nose.'

I don't know why that's so funny.

I was gonna post the same thing

Teaches you to get your facts RIGHT!
#19
Also, let's not forget - let's *not* forget, Dude - that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city - that aint legal either.
If you do something right, no one will know you've done anything at all

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#20
Quote by blake1221
It was a marten bro, get your facts straight.


His facts are straight according to the news article. Ever heard of copy/paste? bro?
#21
Weasels don't kill people, rappers do.
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