#1
Just a question that popped into my head?


Personally I think that too much attention is worse.
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#4
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Something tells me that nothing that has "too" in front of it is good for you.


Right but think of it as the lesser of two evils.
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Nah he's too busy feeling like a big man hitting women he knows to 'put them in their place'.
#5
Too little.
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#7
I think they're equally awful.

Too much:
Pros: you're more likely to develop social skills.
Cons: you're more likely to be narcissistic.

Too little:
Pros: you develop your own independent personality much easier
Cons: less able to interact with the world.
#8
I'd rather have too much. I wouldn't like to feel neglected.
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#9
Quote by trueamerican
Too little:
Pros: you develop your own independent personality much easier
Cons: less able to interact with the world.

That's me, bronut.
#10
Too much. It's sorta similar to the idea that it's better to regret doing something than not doing it. It's better to have yourself out there, whatever may come, than remain in obscurity.
#11
As is everything in life, you have to get the balance right. Too much attention can turn someone into a ****, and too little attention can break someone.
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#12
Depends on how you look at it, but personally I'd have to go with too little.

Yeah it's definitely better to have too little.
Last edited by ali.guitarkid7 at Jun 18, 2011,
#13
The only people I can think of that could possibly get so much attention to the point that it's harmful or disturbing to them are stars and hot chicks.

Since for mere mortals getting too much attention is a virtual impossibility, I'm gonna go with not enough attention being worse.

In the end, it's the choice of what you like better: running away or running after people.
I'm going with running away.

EDIT: actually, now that I think about it, strike that and reverse it. I just realised it pisses me off every time somebody knocks on my door, I'll take my solitude and privacy, after all
Last edited by CoreysMonster at Jun 18, 2011,
#14
too little is better.
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#15
Too much. I just want to be left alone.


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#17
Some of the coolest, most well-rounded people I know have benefit from too little attention, as they had the time to develop a genuine personality. Some of the most insecure and conniving people I know have turned for the worse from too much attention, and continue to act ridiculous to maintain it.
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#18
Quote by CoreysMonster
The only people I can think of that could possibly get so much attention to the point that it's harmful or disturbing to them are stars and hot chicks.

Since for mere mortals getting too much attention is a virtual impossibility, I'm gonna go with not enough attention being worse.

In the end, it's the choice of what you like better: running away or running after people.
I'm going with running away.

EDIT: actually, now that I think about it, strike that and reverse it. I just realised it pisses me off every time somebody knocks on my door, I'll take my solitude and privacy, after all


Yeah, but too much attention starts with family members. If you're spoiled rotten as a kid, that counts too.
#20
Quote by trueamerican
Yeah, but too much attention starts with family members. If you're spoiled rotten as a kid, that counts too.

Kids are a different story, though.
Giving kids not enough attention is FAR worse than giving them too much. If you never spend time with your kids they will develop at a much slower rate than normal kids and will struggle for a very long time with the simplest things like speech and reading.

Sure, spoiling kids rotten will turn them into self-centered brats, but they will be advanced enough to eventually realise that and change it, if they wish to, or use their brattiness to their advantage.
A child who is slow because his parents never taught him anything will be lost with very little chances.
#21
The choice is between being an arsehole and being lonely. i'd rather be an arsehole, so I'd rather have too much.
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#22
Quote by CoreysMonster
Kids are a different story, though.
Giving kids not enough attention is FAR worse than giving them too much. If you never spend time with your kids they will develop at a much slower rate than normal kids and will struggle for a very long time with the simplest things like speech and reading.

Sure, spoiling kids rotten will turn them into self-centered brats, but they will be advanced enough to eventually realise that and change it, if they wish to, or use their brattiness to their advantage.
A child who is slow because his parents never taught him anything will be lost with very little chances.


Nah man. You're looking at neglect vs. giving your kid a lot of attention. What I'm talking about is actually reinforcing your child's belief that he is the center of the world. That can be as bad, or worse, as neglect, in terms of development.
#23
Quote by trueamerican
Nah man. You're looking at neglect vs. giving your kid a lot of attention. What I'm talking about is actually reinforcing your child's belief that he is the center of the world. That can be as bad, or worse, as neglect, in terms of development.

How so?
#24
Quote by trueamerican
Nah man. You're looking at neglect vs. giving your kid a lot of attention. What I'm talking about is actually reinforcing your child's belief that he is the center of the world. That can be as bad, or worse, as neglect, in terms of development.

Nahh

Overly confident kid > feral kid
#25
It's not "overly confident." Narcissists and the like do tend to function well within society, but that doesn't mean that they aren't severely ****ed up. Not knowing about it doesn't make it less worse. Suicidal people tend to hide their thoughts from everyone and put on a mask. That doesn't make the awfulness of the situation go away.
#27
Quote by trueamerican
It's not "overly confident." Narcissists and the like do tend to function well within society, but that doesn't mean that they aren't severely ****ed up. Not knowing about it doesn't make it less worse. Suicidal people tend to hide their thoughts from everyone and put on a mask. That doesn't make the awfulness of the situation go away.

Actually, from a quick look at Wikipedia, narcissistic personality disorder doesn't just happen with kids who were just spoilt, it can also be caused in kids who weren't praised enough or had extremes in their rewards and punishments.

Also, an interesting list of NPD symptoms:

Pointers
Thomas suggests the following pointers may indicate the presence of someone with narcissistic personality disorder.
They expect others to do the day-to-day chores as they feel too important to waste their time on common things.
They very rarely talk about their inner life - for example their memories and dreams.
There tends to be a higher level of stress with people who work with or interact with a narcissist, which in turn increases absenteeism and staff turnover.
They feel that rules at work don't apply to them.
Their sense of self-importance and lack of empathy means that they will often interrupt the conversation of others.
They get impatient and restless when the topic of conversation is about someone else, and not about them.
They constantly use "I", "me" and "my" when they talk.
They lack empathy and this colours everything they do.
They love to delegate work, and then interfere by micromanaging it. If it goes well they take the credit (plagiarism); if it goes badly, they blame the person they delegated it to.
Blame others for their actions and misfortunes.
During a conversation, no matter what topic is being discussed, they usually end up talking about themselves.
They will always cheat whenever they think they will get away with it.
Virtually all their ideas or ways of behaving in a given situation are taken from others (mirroring).

Sounds like most of the bosses I've ever worked for
#28
Quote by trueamerican

Cons: you're more likely to be narcissistic.


I didn't say "you're more likely to be a narcissist" for a reason. It's not necessarily NPD itself, it can easily manifest itself in narcissistic personality traits.

And having done extensive research on NPD for a huge ass term paper, I can most definitely tell you that people with NPD are completely dependent on praise. It's their drug (one of them). Much like psychopaths, they can adjust very well to society (at least phenotypically). They're often in great shape, intelligent, etc. But they don't give a **** about anyone else. They're unable to form real relationships. And worst of all, because of the great adjustment and the nature of NPD itself, the vast majority of cases go untreated.

With NPD, you're basically ****ed. You'll be dependent on others' praise, while simultaneously disregarding the inferior opinions of inferior people, while agreeing with their praise, while needing more, without anybody they're actually close too, among tons of other shit.

At least depression can be treated much easier.
#29
Quote by trueamerican
I didn't say "you're more likely to be a narcissist" for a reason. It's not necessarily NPD itself, it can easily manifest itself in narcissistic personality traits.

And having done extensive research on NPD for a huge ass term paper, I can most definitely tell you that people with NPD are completely dependent on praise. It's their drug (one of them). Much like psychopaths, they can adjust very well to society (at least phenotypically). They're often in great shape, intelligent, etc. But they don't give a **** about anyone else. They're unable to form real relationships. And worst of all, because of the great adjustment and the nature of NPD itself, the vast majority of cases go untreated.

With NPD, you're basically ****ed. You'll be dependent on others' praise, while simultaneously disregarding the inferior opinions of inferior people, while agreeing with their praise, while needing more, without anybody they're actually close too, among tons of other shit.

At least depression can be treated much easier.

huh. interesting. What about people who never got praise from their parents but then started getting praise for getting famous or whatever?
#30
Too little. I prefer to be let be.
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#31
Too much; if you get overwhelmed you can always find ways to avoid at least some of it, even if you have to go slightly out of your way to avoid certain people.
On the other hand, if you get too little attention it's considerably harder to just get more (without doing something colossally stupid).

Then again, I'm a very independent person so I can cope perfectly well with little/no attention.
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#32
Quote by CoreysMonster
huh. interesting. What about people who never got praise from their parents but then started getting praise for getting famous or whatever?


Well these things are rarely black and white, so it could go a few ways (and many other ways I don't list):
-being completely unsure of how to accept praise, it being completely new to them, they could reject it due to the insecurities that haunt them from their childhood.
-they could completely reject their childhoods and parents. Kind of a "**** you Dad you never believed in me, but everyone says I'm awesome so I must be!" It becomes pure overcompensation.
-drugs. Lots of drugs
-Utter confusion. Neither acceptance or rejection of the praise, just a complete inability to process it.
-Ignore it. Since their parents never praised them, they simply adjusted to that, became independent much quicker, and learned to live without the acceptance of others. Therefore, praise simply doesn't mean much.
-Nothing. Some kids can completely overcome their childhood.
-Inner peace. Not being praised can cause some shit. So getting acknowledged later in life could cure that crippling feeling of inadequacy and help them move on.

Personally, I think that for people who were just ignored as kids, the first one makes the most sense.
#34
Too little because I like to have one deep relationship over a few Ok ones, to much because I am a people person and cant expect a small amount of people to provide enough people.

They both suck.

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#35
Try being on the receiving end of both sides of the stick. I just don't really give a **** anymore

To be honest the only thing I've ever really benefited from is music. People seem to confuse the shit out of me all the time.
#36
I would probably rather get too little attention. I enjoy going out as much as anyone, but doing it too much wears me out, so if I was constantly bombarded by admirers I would probably go insane. Then again, it would be much easier to start a cult, which would be pretty awesome.
#37
Too little.

Then you can see what idiots the ones with too much are.
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