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#1
I just got attacked by this huge ass venomous spider in my kitchen:



I was barefoot and almost stepped on it before I saw it and nearly shit my pants. The body was about as large as a golf ball and legs almost as big as cigarettes. And it was a pretty tough little ****er too, I had to hit it 4 times with a broom with all my strength before it finally died.

So pit, any interesting stories about huge spiders or other vile little beasts getting into your homes?
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epic win. total, epic win. this is probably the best OC ever created on UG.

kudos, sir.

kudos.
Last edited by blindfatkid23 at Jul 5, 2011,
#2
...


Sounds like you were the one that did the attacking.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/LYZyCdp.gif[/img]


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Last edited by Momentosis at Jul 5, 2011,
#5
Quote by Momentosis
...


Sounds like you were that did the attacking.


It was me or her buddy. Also the spider was the one to break into my home so I had every right to act on account of legitimate defense.
Quote by fail
Either you're safe or you've won the whole damn thread.


Quote by CoreysMonster


epic win. total, epic win. this is probably the best OC ever created on UG.

kudos, sir.

kudos.
#6
The bite of that kind of spider is not deadly. It would probably have caused a small lesion that would be prone to infection, so getting medical treatment immediately would be advisable, however, not deadly.
#7
i ****in hate those things. last week i was watchin tv in the dark, and a big ass spider was crawling across my leg then i noticed it, jumped up and hit it with a shoe.
I smoke like Rasta, got hair like pasta
I be sippin' on them shots then bustin' rhymes like Busta


Load up the bong, crank up the song, let the informa call 911
#9
Quote by StewieSwan
Wow you're not pathetic at all.


At least I don't play in a band called Chameleon
Quote by fail
Either you're safe or you've won the whole damn thread.


Quote by CoreysMonster


epic win. total, epic win. this is probably the best OC ever created on UG.

kudos, sir.

kudos.
Last edited by blindfatkid23 at Jul 5, 2011,
#10
Why didn't you use a shoe or something, or I don't know actually step on it. The broom was just an ineffective weapon.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#11
Do you know that the spider was venomous? If so, you were justified; if not, you just murdered a poor, misunderstood creature.
#13
Quote by blindfatkid23
At least I don't play in a band called Chameleon



Ah so you can't read either. Cool.
Check out my band Disturbed
#14
Quote by metal4eva_22
Do you know that the spider was venomous? If so, you were justified; if not, you just murdered a poor, misunderstood creature.


Yeah I checked online. It said it was, unless maybe it was just a spider that looked like that but I'm pretty sure that's the one. It looked just like that and it's said to be found in the region I live in.
Quote by fail
Either you're safe or you've won the whole damn thread.


Quote by CoreysMonster


epic win. total, epic win. this is probably the best OC ever created on UG.

kudos, sir.

kudos.
#16
i almost die of laughter every time Eric_Fail makes a new thread, but you don't see me making a new thread every time it happens.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#17
Spiders are a pretty cool guy, he kills other bugs and doesn't afraid of anything.

Seriously, should have put it outside. The only thing i kill is roaches: hate those ****ers.
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#18
Quote by CG Man16
Spiders are a pretty cool guy, he kills other bugs and doesn't afraid of anything.

Seriously, should have put it outside. The only thing i kill is roaches: hate those ****ers.


Roaches are harmless.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#20
Quote by StewieSwan
Ah so you can't read either. Cool.

Touché.
Quote by fail
Either you're safe or you've won the whole damn thread.


Quote by CoreysMonster


epic win. total, epic win. this is probably the best OC ever created on UG.

kudos, sir.

kudos.
#21
Live and let live. Spiders do more good than harm. I always take them outside. It's just bad karma to kill them, dude.
#22
Quote by tayroar
Roaches are harmless.


but roaches will survive the nuclear apocalypse, and i'll be damned if those little douchebags are gonna outlast me.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#23
Quote by tayroar
Roaches are harmless.

I know. I just hate them.
Quote by severed-metal
Come to think of it, my penis should've listened to more death metal.


Quote by Morphogenesis26
So my question is. Can Pre-Cum fluid pass through my underwear, my jeans, onto and through her jeans, through her underwear, and impregnate her?
#24
Quote by theogonia777
but roaches will survive the nuclear apocalypse, and i'll be damned if those little douchebags are gonna outlast me.


People will too, we're probably more adaptable than roaches, we just adapt through technology.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#25
Roaches are not harmless. They harbour countless diseases. They are nasty. If I had them here, they would die.
#26
I saw a roach on its back struggling to flip itself back onto its legs this morning. I laughed to myself and thought of how superior I am, then I peed in the toilet and walked away lololol
LARGE TEXT
#28
Quote by tayroar
People will too, we're probably more adaptable than roaches, we just adapt through technology.


it doesn't matter how well we adapt, cause radiation poison will kill us. it takes about 400-1000 rads to kill a human, where cockroaches require about 6400.

though that is pretty wimpy compared to other insects. fruit flies, for example take about 64000 rads to kill. *source*
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#29
Quote by Holy.
I saw a roach on its back struggling to flip itself back onto its legs this morning. I laughed to myself and thought of how superior I am, then I peed in the toilet and walked away lololol


Just think how pantshittingly terrifying that would be to be that small and have some giant walk over you while you are totally helpless. I wonder how bugs cope with our existance. I sometimes wonder if they think we're like gods.

I also **** with bugs by moving them like a hundred yards away. That has to be like moving across an entire country for them, that shit would be crazy.


Quote by theogonia777
it doesn't matter how well we adapt, cause radiation poison will kill us. it takes about 400-1000 rads to kill a human, where cockroaches require about 6400.

though that is pretty wimpy compared to other insects. fruit flies, for example take about 64000 rads to kill. *source*



Where there is a problem there is a way around it. Life wouldn't be amazing but I guarantee you there will be people on this planet until the day it can no longer hold life. We already have ways of living in high radiation environments, it's just a matter of mass production and getting it to people. Underground bunkers are also an option with enough warning. There's a way, and some people will use it, and these people will reproduce, alas humans will continue living.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
Last edited by tayroar at Jul 5, 2011,
#30
Quote by tayroar
Just think how pantshittingly terrifying that would be to be that small and have some giant walk over you while you are totally helpless. I wonder how bugs cope with our existance. I sometimes wonder if they think we're like gods.

I also **** with bugs by moving them like a hundred yards away. That has to be like moving across an entire country for them, that shit would be crazy.


That literally just made me see the unseen.
Don't mess up.
#32
When I see a spider I try to get it on my hand and lead it outside. If it's too much of a pussy I put it in a napkin.

*awaits the treehugger comments*
^^ Hahah, I'm just kidding.. or am I?


Don't click this.
#33
Quote by Dash49
When I see a spider I try to get it on my hand and lead it outside. If it's too much of a pussy I put it in a napkin.

*awaits the treehugger comments*


you dirty treehugger! why don't you go hug a tree or something!
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
#34
Quote by HitTheLights81
That literally just made me see the unseen.


I just imagine they damn me to hell, and then begin an epic quest to get back to their family. They probably wrote their own version of the Odyssey about a bug I moved. When I was younger I bounced golf balls on my front porch and if I saw rolly poleys I'd bounce it all around them to freak them out before it'd inevitable fall on them.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#35
Ugh, just imagine if you had stepped on it and then a hundred babies came out... Happened to me once when I was 7 and obsessed with killing bugs, y'know. Scary stuff right there.
#36
What's a spider?
*-)
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i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

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#37
Quote by theogonia777
it doesn't matter how well we adapt, cause radiation poison will kill us. it takes about 400-1000 rads to kill a human, where cockroaches require about 6400.

though that is pretty wimpy compared to other insects. fruit flies, for example take about 64000 rads to kill. *source*
I've played fallout enough to know how to get rid of radiation, thank you very much!


and damn it TS! You thwarted my plan of letting a poisonous spider in your house for you to get attacked by and die a slow, painful death. Til we meet again!
[img]http://cdn.gs.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/v.gif[/img]
#38
Quote by element4433
What's a spider?


What are you serious? Do they call spiders other things in other english speaking countries?
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#39
Quote by tayroar
Just think how pantshittingly terrifying that would be to be that small and have some giant walk over you while you are totally helpless. I wonder how bugs cope with our existance. I sometimes wonder if they think we're like gods.

Not only that, but I whipped out my dick like 4 feet away from it. Right as I left the bathroom I called my cat in and I think you pretty much know what happened next.
LARGE TEXT
#40
Quote by element4433
What's a spider?


a spider is a creature, usually between 10-40 inches tall, weighing between 10-100 lbs, that emits a cry so awful, just hearing it can be fatal.
There's no such thing; there never was. Where I am going you cannot follow me now.
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