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#1
I always end up saying something lame when I'm offered, like "Nah sorry man, I don't smoke", which is always a conversation killer.

Some people I hang around with a lot often percieve non-smokers as boring and a bit elitist - I have absolutely no problems with people wanting to smoke straights, rollies, weed, whatever I've done it all anyway, but saying something like the above always seems to put me on a different page to them.

Pit, what are some funny and interesting things I can say when offered a fag, and use to initiate conversation.

Bring it.
#3
i eat fags for breakfast and smoke cigars like they are fags
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#4
Quote by demon.guitarist
I always end up saying something lame when I'm offered, like "Nah sorry man, I don't smoke", which is always a conversation killer.

Some people I hang around with a lot often percieve non-smokers as boring and a bit elitist - I have absolutely no problems with people wanting to smoke straights, rollies, weed, whatever I've done it all anyway, but saying something like the above always seems to put me on a different page to them.

Pit, what are some funny and interesting things I can say when offered a fag, and use to initiate conversation.

Bring it.


"Hey, do you want a smoke?"
"How about, do YOU want a smoke?"
"....."
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I do genuinely love her, and not just because I like her breasts you know?
#6
No, but let me tell you some smoking FACTS! Over 25,000 people blah blah cancer, tar, money etc etc. Now you can have an argument!
#8
"I prefer not to die."

is one I pull out whenever someone offers a cigarette, whenever I just say no it just ends there...a lot of my smoking friends and people who smoke have self pity for themselves and high regard for people who don't, then again everyone I know who smokes has a degree of maturity about smoking so they don't care either way.
yo.

I BELIEVE
#9
Jesus, I wish I got offered smokes...... would save me money

Edit: I don't know what to say, probably something with 'your mum' attached to the end
Quote by lambofgod127
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#10
"No thank you good sir, I don't enjoying inhaling smoke into my lungs. Say, did you know that Tobacco is the single largest cause of preventable death worldwide? And that according to figures published by the WHO, tobacco caused 5.4 million deaths in 2004 and 100 million deaths over the course of the 20th century?"

Should get the conversation flowing nicely.
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Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


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I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
#12
Shoot them in the face.
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(´・ω・`)


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#13
Quote by Teh Traineez0rz
"I prefer not to die.".


Yeah because you won't die anyways, right?

Just say "I have cancer" and expect the blank look of the other guy.
#15
Sorry, I'm gay.
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#18
I usually go with:

"Naaahh, I probably shouldn't. I mean, when I get drunk I tend to smoke if others are. Or if you have to smoke in order to be in the outdoor part. So, I mean, I probably shouldn't, you know."

Usually by the end of that sentence I have a cigarette in my mouth.
#19
Chisel your teeth out, then say you wouldn't want to discolor your teeth.

Or start yelling about them being a pedophile.
#21
I can't, there's a petrol station nearby, we could all explode. YOU'RE ENDANGERING EVERYONE'S LIVES.

Even better if you're in the middle of a forest, or the ocean...
Check out my Tumblr
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#27
"No thanks, smokers are jokers!"
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Tobysaurus is one sexy man.

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I think I love you Tobysaurus!

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God damn, you've given me a boner Toby!
#28
If I wanted something in my mouth I'd fellate myself right now.
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that'd be slightly creepy if i didn't find it so amusing.
#30
I don't want a fag, gimme Clay Aiken, that's how I roll
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Let me get this straight. You're asking a bunch of people who are sitting at their computers, likely due to boredom, what to do for fun.



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Wise words
#31
Nah, I get more smoke from my fog machine.

PSPSSSHHHHH


el oh el meme.....
#32
If anything, this thread has shown me (and hopefully everyone else) that there is simply no funny way to decline a smoke.
#33
"No thanks, I'm the designated driver"
sometimes I see us in a cymbal splash or in the sound of a car crash
#34
No thanks. I'm an enchanted golem made from dry twigs and firelighters.
I'LL PUNCH A DONKEY IN THE STREETS OF GALWAY
#36
Answer:"Would you like a smoke?"

Reply:"Would you like my foot up your ass?"
Father of ilikepirates And icesk8erqueen8
every man on here who tries to touch them will get his dick chopped off.

E-married to Shyne <3



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#37
Quote by Antis0cial
Answer:"Would you like a smoke?"

Reply:"Would you like my foot up your ass?"

wut
#38
Quote by Antis0cial
Answer:"Would you like a smoke?"

Reply:"Would you like my foot up your ass?"


SO COOL
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as i walk through the chalet of the shadow of death
everything that you've come to expect


#40
No one gets my vague reference to that 70s show

Sad times
Father of ilikepirates And icesk8erqueen8
every man on here who tries to touch them will get his dick chopped off.

E-married to Shyne <3



Officialy has OddOneOut as e-sexslave
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