#1
Pretty gross topic, almost didn't post it, but then remembered it's the pit.
Anyway, who's had them before?
I'm currently dealing with one.
In fact, I'm seeing a doctor about it tomorrow.

So who here has any tales of cured hemorrhoids to make me feel better about it?
Help me put all my problems behind me
#2
...get the fuck out.
I shall grant you three wishes.

None of which will work.


Does the above post enrage, offend or confuse you?

Good.


I like my women how I like my guitars. Curvy and like it when I finger them.
#3
Have fun with that dude. :|
Quote by SlackerBabbath
My ideal woman would be a grossly overweight woman who would happy go jogging, come home all sweaty and let me put my dick under her armpit while she shuffles a pack of cards.

Stay classy, pit.
#6
now i feel good about myself for never having hemorrhoids, thanks TS
#8
Symptomatic hemorrhoids affect at least 50% of the American population at some time during their lives, with around 5% of the population suffering at any given time, and both sexes experiencing the same incidence of the condition. Good thing I don't live in America
#9
I had one recently... just sit down kinda sideways and you won't irritate it so bad. Unfortunately they go away so gradually that you don't get much of a sigh of relief, you just forget about it.
I'm rgrockr and I do not approve of this message.
#10
I had them for two years. My last outbreak was last year but since then I havent had an outbreak. I changed my diet considerably.

Drink at least 2 litres of water a day.
Increase fibre content dramatically.
Eat more fruit and veg, lay of foods high in fat.
Exercise more.
Sat in a lab, curing diseases. They actually LET me play with chemicals!
#11
Quote by Guitardude19
I had them for two years. My last outbreak was last year but since then I havent had an outbreak. I changed my diet considerably.

Drink at least 2 litres of water a day.
Increase fibre content dramatically.
Eat more fruit and veg, lay of foods high in fat.
Exercise more.


I had one a few years back, not even painful, and it went away pretty quickly.
This one, however is bleeding, which is why I'm seeing a doctor tomorrow.

Im drinking a heap of water at the moment, and I'm considering eating a bowl of bran right now.
And I had to stop exercising over the last few days because of the strain it put on my butthole.
#13
Quote by tyler_j
I had one a few years back, not even painful, and it went away pretty quickly.
This one, however is bleeding, which is why I'm seeing a doctor tomorrow.

Im drinking a heap of water at the moment, and I'm considering eating a bowl of bran right now.
And I had to stop exercising over the last few days because of the strain it put on my butthole.


Ive been there dude. I feel for you. I hope yours hasnt prolapsed. Thats the worst pain ever. Once it heals, all you really need to do is eat more fibre and drink more water. Its the not drinking enough water that causes you to become constipated, strain and pop a blood vessel in your butt.
Sat in a lab, curing diseases. They actually LET me play with chemicals!
#14
I had one sometime last year.

It puts a lotta strain on your righteous A.
May the Force be with You.
Carmel is hawt
#15
Quote by Guitardude19
Ive been there dude. I feel for you. I hope yours hasnt prolapsed. Thats the worst pain ever. Once it heals, all you really need to do is eat more fibre and drink more water. Its the not drinking enough water that causes you to become constipated, strain and pop a blood vessel in your butt.



It's not too painful, so I'm not worrying about prolapse yet. But it's just bleeding lightly, but constantly.
But thanks for the advice, man.
#16
Okay, I didn't know what Hemorrhoids was so I had the brilliant idea to check wikipedia and Googlepics...
#17
Quote by PotBellyShogun
is that like the sequel to asteroids?



OT: Shit dude, don't know much about them but good luck man.
#19
Quote by Guitardude19
Ive been there dude. I feel for you. I hope yours hasnt prolapsed. Thats the worst pain ever. Once it heals, all you really need to do is eat more fibre and drink more water. Its the not drinking enough water that causes you to become constipated, strain and pop a blood vessel in your butt.

dude, kidney stones are the worst pain ever...

i've had to piss a 7mm one out along with having lithotripsy on 2 more.

hemorrhoids are something i'd rather have than kidney stones.
Belief is a beautiful armour but makes for the heaviest sword.
#20
Wow, that sucks bad. I've had mine flare up twice, both stress related. In both cases, they lasted no more than a week. I hope yours isn't anything serious. Good luck!
Quote by Duv
Oh, and for resonance just play unplugged and see if it's loud. And smack an open A chord and hold the body and see if it vibrates like a middle-aged woman's best friend.
#22
Quote by willhurley82
Wow, that sucks bad. I've had mine flare up twice, both stress related. In both cases, they lasted no more than a week. I hope yours isn't anything serious. Good luck!


Oh wow, can they be related to stress too?
I've got bad stress, actually. Like, I stress so bad I get occasional tremors.

I'm hoping it clears up soon; heading overseas in a week and I don't want to be worrying about it the whole time.
#23
ITT:fat asses who eat all the time without working out and when they take a shit it hurts.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


Free Jani92jani

Free Will Swanson
#25
Quote by GbAdimDb5m7
ITT:fat asses who eat all the time without working out and when they take a shit it hurts.


You know nothing of this.
And besides, I work out daily, work weekends and I like to think I eat pretty well.

Quote by ali.guitarkid7
You've doomed us all!

Avert your eyes, fellow pit monkeys!


And basically this.

Quote by GbAdimDb5m7
So you are one of the few who suffer from it because of stress, but you know most people don't.


Yeah, that seems to be the only thing I can think of.
Last edited by tyler_j at Jul 7, 2011,
#26
Quote by tyler_j
You know nothing of this.
And besides, I work out daily, work weekends and I like to think I eat pretty well.

So you are one of the few who suffer from it because of stress, but you know most people don't.
Quote by tattyreagh
He's the hero The Pit deserves but not the one it needs right now. So, we'll hunt him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian. A watchful protector. GbAdimDb5m7.


Free Jani92jani

Free Will Swanson
#27
Maybe you're just too healthy for your own good TS.

I suggest you take up smoking, eat a few burgers and then go out and buy some hard drugs.
They will save your ass, sir.

AEDIT: Pun unintended
Last edited by ali.guitarkid7 at Jul 7, 2011,
#28
Quote by ali.guitarkid7
Maybe you're just too healthy for your own good TS.

I suggest you take up smoking, eat a few burgers and then go out and buy some hard drugs.
They will save your ass, sir.

AEDIT: Pun unintended


Using the pun that no one picked up on earlier,
That ought to put all my problems behind me
#31
Quote by GbAdimDb5m7
ITT:fat asses who eat all the time without working out and when they take a shit it hurts.

Actually I've had them and I weigh 124lbs. They were stress related.
#32
Thanks to you, I googled 'Hemorrhoids' for images. I am not a happy man right now


Gozd in gora poj,
silen ženimo hrup,
uboga gmajna, le vpup, le vkup,
le vkup, le vkup z menoj,
staro pravdo v mrak tulimo,
da se pretulimo skozi to zimo