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#2
What, you didn't know this? What's next, you're gunna tell me you didn't know Jazz causes AIDS!?
I'm just like the Jonas Brothers,

I'm no longer relevant and write mediocre music.


#5
Quote by Weaponxclaws
Everything causes cancer now..


I wish somebody would just be smart about it and make a statement like

"Being alive increases your risk for cancer exponentially."

and let that be the end of it.
-----
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#6
Quote by TheBodomBullet
I wish somebody would just be smart about it and make a statement like

"Being alive increases your risk for cancer exponentially."

and let that be the end of it.

I'll do a scientific study on it. I'll compare the number of alive people who have cancer with the number of dead people who have cancer.
I'm just like the Jonas Brothers,

I'm no longer relevant and write mediocre music.


#9
Local pastor, Father Bill O'Connolly, has welcomed the results of the study, saying that science has finally proven religion right.


oh look, a pastor using science.
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Your post was the only bright spot in this disgusting piece of thread.

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You have balls. I like balls....(awkward silence)

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I waited for the rape.

...


...but the rape never came
#10
Quote by jetfuel495
If you two wrote a book together, I'd read it.

Nice. I'm also planning on writing a groundbreaking book on "The Woodchuck Theory". I'm developing a mathematical equation to see how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

OT: Metal = Cancer
I'm just like the Jonas Brothers,

I'm no longer relevant and write mediocre music.


#13
Sounds like a dodgy experiment. No control group mentioned? 30 years of research wasted then. Even if they were to find that there is a statistically significant relationship between heavy metal music and cancer, they would have to posit some mechanism which explains why there is a causal link rather than mere correlation.

Far from proving religion right, contrary to the good, and indeed ignorant, Pastor's comments. I'd also be curious to see an official publication of the studies.
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#14
Quote by Athabasca
Sounds like a dodgy experiment. No control group mentioned? 30 years of research wasted then. Even if they were to find that there is a statistically significant relationship between heavy metal music and cancer, they would have to posit some mechanism which explains why there is a causal link rather than mere correlation.

Far from proving religion right, contrary to the good, and indeed ignorant, Pastor's comments. I'd also be curious to see an official publication of the studies.


Dude, calm down with your "control" mumbo jumbo, they cited Led Zeppelin. They proved it correct.
#15
You know the study was done by a bunch of out-of-touch, old retards when they call Led Zeppelin "heavy metal"
PM me for newts
#17
so heavy metal makes u more prone to have cancer.............. what doesn't noways, really. I would worry about another million things before metal music, like stupid threads, yes, they give you cancer too.
#18
Quote by Meelad360
But they proved it.

Have you ever seen a dead guy with cancer? Bam.
-----
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Bugera 6262 212 120 Watt amp :

Coming soon:
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#19
"NOTE: These works are entirely fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, events or places is purely coincidental."

Just saying.
Kodiak bears make awesome bandmates.

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#20
Quote by Athabasca
Sounds like a dodgy experiment. No control group mentioned? 30 years of research wasted then. Even if they were to find that there is a statistically significant relationship between heavy metal music and cancer, they would have to posit some mechanism which explains why there is a causal link rather than mere correlation.

Far from proving religion right, contrary to the good, and indeed ignorant, Pastor's comments. I'd also be curious to see an official publication of the studies.


I didn't read anything about a causal link guess it has something to do with the way of living, which makes the subjects more vulnerable to cancer.

That being said, pastor should shut up and go back to praying.
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You sir are a dick!
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And then again, Wildthang, "You're probably NOT one of them clean Socialists, either"

Wat.
#21
Quote by Cocolate
so heavy metal makes u more prone to have cancer.............. what doesn't noways, really. I would worry about another million things before metal music, like stupid threads, yes, they give you cancer too.



You should probably just go on hiatus for a while.
#22
In other news, recent studies show living has raised starving childrens chances of dying over 9000% percent.
╘MESHUG╦G╗AH





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#23
Quote by CPDmusic
What, you didn't know this? What's next, you're gunna tell me you didn't know Jazz causes AIDS!?


Don't be silly. Jazz cures it.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

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#24
Quote by genghisgandhi


You should probably just go on hiatus for a while.

so... we meet again
Last edited by Cocolate at Jul 11, 2011,
#25
Quote by necrosis1193
Don't be silly. Jazz cures it.

Jazz curses everything.
I'm just like the Jonas Brothers,

I'm no longer relevant and write mediocre music.


#26
Quote by CPDmusic
Nice. I'm also planning on writing a groundbreaking book on "The Woodchuck Theory". I'm developing a mathematical equation to see how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

OT: Metal = Cancer

According to the research I have been working on (government funding, aww yeah), if a woodchuck could chuck wood, it would chuck all the wood that a woodchuck could. If of course, a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Technically speaking
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Dude, your fucking sig creeps me out.

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I just noticed his sig too...I feel uncomfortable now...

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Your sig killed my boner _


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#28
The article lost all hope of validity when Zeppelin was considered heavy metal. These people should take a few high school statistics courses and learn about lurking variables -.-
Maybe "heavy metal"/Zeppelin listeners tend to smoke more than people who don't listen to "Satanic music" and that is the true reason these people have cancer.

Orrrr I guessssssss it could be because when Jimmy Page sold his soul to the devil, the other part of the deal was that whenever people listened to his music, microscopic organisms were spontaneously generated in mid-air that would then flow into the listener's ears, into the brain and bloodstream, and infect the listener with cancer
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You are amazing. The fact that you have paramore next to disturbed shows how awesome you are.
Here, an awesome medal. It's made out of awesomnite.
:extends medal:


Quote by Fallen_Seeker
Thank you!
I would give you an awesome metal, but
I can't find any awesomnite.
#29
You could say that a lot of people that listen to heavy metal smoke and drink alcohol which also gives you a bigger chance to develop cancer. But I think that wasn't taken into account when they did this "research".
"Don’t be a guitarist. Be a musician."

Steve Howe
#30
Note how that was a blog?
Blog=/=Legitimate Information

Most people that listen to any kind of metal smoke, drink and do drugs... I believe those all cause Cancer.
..I was watching my death.
#34
well this is stupid
I'm not a James Hetfield fan
My username is "hames jetfield" because "farty mriedman" sounds weird.

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#35
REALLY hope everyone posting in here knew that this article was complete and utter bullshit.

Even so, as a metal head, when I listen to metal, it relives stress. Less stress = better health. Better health = less cancer. Less cancer = good thing.
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To attempt to have intercourse with a hornet's nest is a very bad idea,

Voted UG's worst cross dresser.
Also voted #95 on UG's Top 100 2013. Like it means anything....
#36
Quote by muffinduck01
REALLY hope everyone posting in here knew that this article was complete and utter bullshit.

Even so, as a metal head, when I listen to metal, it relives stress. Less stress = better health. Better health = less cancer. Less cancer = good thing.

no. moar cancer=moar metal\m/
I'm not a James Hetfield fan
My username is "hames jetfield" because "farty mriedman" sounds weird.

Quote by laid-to-waste
i have rabies from licking my pet rat's face


Jackson DK2M
Digitech RP255
Vox DA5
Casio CTK-6000
#37
citizens of the world, this is your leader, dont worry about drinking, smoking or whatever messed up thing you do, just please, please stop listening to led zeppelin's heavy metal music now before it's too late
#38
Quote by DempseyPunk
According to the research I have been working on (government funding, aww yeah), if a woodchuck could chuck wood, it would chuck all the wood that a woodchuck could. If of course, a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Technically speaking

Yes, as we all know, I wood chuck cannot chuck would and this is simply theoretical.

Two things that must be considered are the mass of the wood, which I have given the variable m, as well as the amount of wood, which I have given the variable a. That's all I've got so far...
I'm just like the Jonas Brothers,

I'm no longer relevant and write mediocre music.


#39
Quote by CPDmusic
Yes, as we all know, I wood chuck cannot chuck would and this is simply theoretical.

Two things that must be considered are the mass of the wood, which I have given the variable m, as well as the amount of wood, which I have given the variable a. That's all I've got so far...

Come to my lab on Wednesday. We shall continue working this out there. Bring your segway.
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>>-(. Y .)-<<
>>> . (<<<
>>-( Y )-<<
Quote by dudetheman
Dude, your fucking sig creeps me out.

Quote by Kosh H
I just noticed his sig too...I feel uncomfortable now...

Quote by WantsLesPaul
Your sig killed my boner _


DIY SO-CAL PUNK LABEL
#40
Quote by Wesseem

But basically...everything causes cancer. everything!


Prrrrrrrrrretty much.
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I don't do things small


Except children.
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