#1
I'm not really sure where to post this seeing as it's more of a problem between two people rather than musician advice. SO

Okay, I've been in a band for over a year we started out as the 3 best friends you can have. It just seemed amazing that the 3 best friends could have a band and we were all into the same music and everything. BUT...
Since the band has started we've noticed our drummer was pretty far behind us musically. For example, he does the same fill in every song. It's the only fill he is capable of performing (most of the time). He simply can't roll in any way or form on time, he is extremely stiff armed and has no emotion for his instrument, just being an extremely stiff, poorly performing robot almost. The worst part is, even on the most basic snare/high hat beats that almost anyone can pick up in an hour, he can rarely keep time on. He's been playing for 3 years, there's really not much getting better on that. SO, if that's not bad enough, he can be extremely immature, he will randomly snap on us for the most random thing, getting to the point of screaming and yelling, then just becoming extremely quiet or mocking us the rest of practice, leading to an even poorer show. Me and my bassist/singer have discussed it, everyone I've talked to thinks if we ever want to have a chance of being really successful, he needs to be gone. I agree. He's a good friend, but he can be a real pain to have in a band. My singer is on the edge about it. He doesn't want to lose one of his best friends but also thinks he is a terrible musician and knows he wants something better, but ultimately doesn't want to sacrifice having a best friend. We know a drummer who would love to join our band in a heart beat who is 10 times better than the our drummer now. He knows how to play his instrument well, puts emotion into it, and doesn't become a problem.

I'm really getting over it, him snapping and taking 3 months to write drums for a 2 minute song that me and my bassist/singer wrote in a day at the most, all 3 parts. My question for you is. What would you do? How would you go about doing it? Any advice for how I might convince my singer to see it my way? Any advice on how to let him go without him hating us forever? Any input will do. Thanks guys.
#2
At least talk to him first, you owe him that.
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#3
It really comes just down to which you would rather have, a friend, or a good band. Pick which one is more important to you.
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#4
I was in a band where people didn't want to put in the practice to become better as well. They were all a little pissy too when it came to disagreements.

This sounds cold, but if you're going to have a band you have to turf him. I understand he's your friend and all, but your band will go absolutely no where with that kind of influence around. Everyone's going to get fed up and leave eventually anyway.
#5
No matter what, me and my bassist/singer are sticking together. That's all.
It's not a matter of putting in time to practice, trust me we've put in plenty. It's a matter of him simply not being cut out for music. Some people just aren't. Simple as that. He should be at an intermediate level of drumming after 3 years, but I know people that play drums better than him that don't even play drums. It's sad. We're stuck between a major rock and a hard place. But I know I want to move on to something better. But I don't want to sacrifice all the songs I've written guitar to by leaving the band. Me and my bassist/singer have a connection musically. The other possible replacement drummer has a connection with us musically too and we know because we've played with him before. It's a major difference.
#6
Sounds like an incredibly shitty bandmate. Frankly, your band will go no where with him in it. You have to choose, him, or a good band.
#7
Definitely let him go, everyone will be happier including the drummer. You WON'T be sacrificing your friendship.
Just say "nothing personal" and replace him with the guy who is a much better fit.

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#8
listen dude...i had the same problem with my shit singer. i just did it myself and took the heat off the rest of the guys. someones gotta go down, might as well be the one whos least close to him
#10
If he stops being your friend for it, then he shouldn't be one of your best friends.
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#11
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If he stops being your friend for it, then he shouldn't be one of your best friends.

This. Your band isn't major, and bringing in big bucks so he has no reason to be pissed at you. especially since he doesnt sound very motivated
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#12
"he will randomly snap on us for the most random thing, getting to the point of screaming and yelling, then just becoming extremely quiet or mocking us the rest of practice,"

Woah, that's some friend you've got there, are you sure you don't want to lose his friendship?
#13
Dumpsville - Population : 1 drummer.

Had to do that before.
Our drummer was also my roommate for 3 years.
He drank to much. Which in itself wasn't a huge problem because we all did. But never before a gig except for maybe a few beers. But no more.
But when he drank anything besides beer, his timing went to total shit.
Last edited by CodeMonk at Jul 19, 2011,
#14
Get a drum machine brah
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#15
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#16
Your situation is almost identical to one I was in around 15 years of age.

Although I started to really hate them and eneded up leaving the band telling them I would be happy never seeing any of them again.

We're still good friends though.
#18
I have the EXACT problem with my bassist. Let me know what you decide!
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